Fries – Page 6 – The Saboscrivner

Rosati’s Pizza

I watch a lot of TV, but I like to think I only watch good shows — well-made, well-written, well-acted. And if I watch a sitcom, it’s going to be legitimately funny, not one of those cringeworthy canned-laughter multicams. One of my newest TV discoveries is South Side on Comedy Central, a sitcom set in the South Side of Chicago, created by the insanely talented and hilarious Bashir Salahuddin and Diallo Riddle. This showrunner duo also has an even funnier show on IFC called Sherman’s Showcase, which will certainly end up in my Top Ten Shows of 2019. I highly recommend jumping into both shows while you can, since their first seasons are still airing, and you can catch up on the Comedy Central and IFC websites I linked to above, or maybe on demand.

Anyway, in last night’s episode of South Side, the lead character Simon made the controversial claim of not liking Chicago’s famous deep dish pizza because “It’s just a lasagna with crust.” I too have joked before that “It’s not pizza; it’s a casserole!” I’ve found deep dish pizza to be far too greasy, dense, and heavy — both by weight and how it sits in my gut afterwards. But my wife loves the stuff, the same way I swear by Sicilian pizza, like the kind they serve at one of my local favorites, Pizzeria Del Dio.

But fate intervened yesterday, in the form of one of my Orlando Foodie Forum friends posting that Rosati’s (https://myrosatis.com/), a Chicago pizzeria known for its deep dish, was opening at the intersection of University and Goldenrod where the Lucky’s Market is, not far from where I work. Still chuckling over the “lasagna with crust” comment, I mentioned it to my wife during the South Side commercial break, and since she loves it so much, we decided to go today. It was the second day this Rosati’s location was open for business, but they were ready for us, and they made an excellent first impression. It was even more of a treat after eating everything in our fridge and freezer for most of the last week, expecting a hurricane that never made it here.

Rosati’s opened in a very small space. It is set up mostly like a takeout pizzeria where you order at the counter, but they do have two tables that can each seat four, as well as a counter with some high-top stools. We had every intention of eating there, so we could try the pizza hot and fresh. As you can see, they also offer appetizers, wings, salads, pasta dishes, sandwiches, and desserts. It’s probably much easier to read the menu on the website above, but this way you can see some prices.

We ordered the 10″ deep dish with sausage, the smallest one they make, which can feed two to three people. Even though we were hungry, we know this is rich and heavy pizza, and a little goes a long way. It came out in about 15 minutes, and it was great! It didn’t have the greasy, buttery crust that Giordano’s and Lou Malnati’s pizzas are known for. (We had Lou’s on a Chicago trip about five years ago, and Giordano’s near the Orange County Convention Center in “tourist town.”) This crust was light and fluffy, with a nice crispy outer layer that wasn’t burnt or dry. It reminded me more of the brilliant and easy cast-iron skillet pizza recipe I have perfected over the last year, created by Bon Appetit’s delightful and creative test chef Claire Saffitz. The tomato sauce was much chunkier than typical pizza sauce, in typical Chicago deep dish fashion, the cheese was melty and had a nice pull to it, and the sausage was flavorful and not overly greasy either.

Rosati’s only had paper plates available because they were still getting situated, but that was totally fine with us. Here’s a single slice from the pizza that looks small, but it’s a lot of food. I ate two slices and my wife just had one, so we have plenty of leftovers to warm in our toaster oven tomorrow.

But surprise of surprises, Rosati’s sells three kinds of pizza: deep dish (apparently a bigger hit among Chicago’s tourists), a thin-crust pizza that many locals prefer, and a hand-rolled “double-dough” pizza. You can order single slices of the double-dough (though not the thin-crust), so I had to try it as well. It’s a large slice, not unlike a typical New York-style slice, but thicker and softer, without the thin crispiness of New York pizza. I asked for pepperoni on this single slice, and as you can see, they were extremely generous with the pepperoni. I also appreciated that each slice of pepperoni didn’t curl into a crunchy little grease-cup, which is why I’m sometimes hesitant to order pepperoni on pizza. Blasphemy, you say? I prefer my pepperoni cold on a sandwich, but this was a good example of a slice of pepperoni pizza. And just so you all know, I cut this slice down the middle and have only eaten half so far.

Since there is often talk about Chicago’s beloved Italian beef sandwiches on the Orlando Foodie Forum, I saw Rosati’s offered them and had to order one for later. This was obviously a lot of food, and you haven’t even seen it all yet! The Italian beef sandwich came with fries, and we did eat most of them at the restaurant, since cold fries are a shande (a shame) and an abomination. They were crinkle-cut fries, very well-salted, and served with packets of Red Gold ketchup, a brand you hardly ever see around here. (Maybe it’s also a Chicago thing.) My wife loves crinkle-cut fries, so that was a nice little bonus.

We chatted with one of the gentlemen in charge of opening up this Rosati’s location. He told us he is based in Chicago but travels around the country for the company, opening up new restaurants and training the staff. We talked a little about different regional pizzas and the food scenes in Chicago and Orlando, and we wished him well as he got this location up and running.

And he couldn’t have been a nicer guy, because while we were still elbow-deep in pizza and fries, he came out with this box of zeppole for us, little nuggets of pizza dough, crispy on the outside and fluffy-soft on the inside, dusted with powdered sugar and served with a big dipping cup of gooey Nutella. This was completely complimentary, just for us being so enthusiastic on their second day. We were very touched by the unexpected gift, and my wife was over the moon because she loves desserts like this. They’re kind of like beignets. This was a giant portion, and we haven’t even made a dent in half of it.

So we came home with lots of leftovers:

And I unwrapped the Italian beef sandwich and heated it up for dinner. For those who are unfamiliar, an Italian beef is a famous Chicago street food, served at establishments like Portillo’s (which has expanded into Florida but not Orlando yet) and Buona Beef. The sandwich is stuffed with thin slices of seasoned roast beef, served on an Italian roll, often with au jus and topped with sweet peppers, hot pickled giardinera vegetables, or a combination of the two. If you think I asked for the combination, you’d be right. I also paid a $1 upcharge to get my Italian beef on garlic bread, because I am grateful to be gainfully employed and don’t have to worry about such things anymore.

Here it is with the au jus, which I opted to get on the side in a cup, rather than have it poured over the sandwich (“dipped,” another option, but it would have made a real mess since I ate it several hours later).

It was very tasty and good quality, but extremely salty. Between our pizza lunch and this sandwich for dinner, I have drunk several glasses of water and a big bottle of Gatorade today. I love a good roast beef sandwich, but I think I prefer mine cold, with rare roast beef, some kind of cheese, some kind of onions (grilled, sauteed, or caramelized), horseradish, mustard, and a creamy sauce to tie it all together. That’s not to say there was anything wrong with this Italian beef. I haven’t had one in many years, and Rosati’s nailed this quintessential Chicago classic, as synonymous with the Windy City as the Blues Brothers and da Bearss (and hopefully one day, South Side). But like the deep dish pizza, you have to be in the mood for it. You have to be ready. You might want to set aside some time for a nap, and to have some Gatorade on hand to rehydrate due to all the salt.

So that’s Rosati’s. We liked it, we’ll definitely go back, and I hope they stick around and are successful. We don’t have many options in Orlando for deep dish pizza or Italian beef sandwiches, so if you’re from Chicago and missing your old favorites, or you just love the new and novel like we do, pay them a visit and give them a warm welcome to Winter Park!

CLOSED: Chain Reactions: Hopdoddy Burger Bar

Note: On May 18, 2020, the Orlando Hopdoddy Burger Bar I reviewed announced it has permanently closed.

Hopdoddy Burger Bar (https://www.hopdoddy.com/) is a chain that comes to us from Texas. The first Florida location opened earlier this year in the Pointe Orlando shopping center on busy International Drive, and it definitely worth a stop if you’re catching a movie at the Regal theater, a stand-up comedy set at the Improv, or attending MegaCon, our massive pop culture convention, in May. That’s where my best food friend and I were coming from when we popped in for lunch before a showing of John Wick 3.

Hopdoddy is a fast-casual burger chain, so if you’ve been to BurgerFi, Shake Shack, or Fuddruckers, you know the score. You order at the counter, and they bring the food to your table when it’s ready. The burgers are larger and much better quality than fast food, but the prices are much more reasonable than most table-service restaurants.

My buddy went with a classic cheeseburger, topped with Tillamook cheddar, “Sassy Sauce,” and the traditional lettuce, tomato, and onion. He said it really hit the spot:

It was cooked to a perfect medium:

I ordered the Good Night/Good Cause burger, which got its name from Hopdoddy donating $1 from every burger ordered to a local charity. It includes Angus beef, Tillamook cheddar, caramelized onions (I’m always a sucker for them on anything), jalapeños (nice and fresh and crunchy and spicy, not the pickled ones from a jar), caffeinated barbecue sauce, “Sassy Sauce,” lettuce, and tomato. It was a very tasty burger, and I give both of them bonus points for being served on fresh-baked brioche buns, lightly toasted on the griddle.

I almost always request my burgers medium rare:

The hand-cut regular fries were fresh and hot, dusted with herbs and served in a huge metal bowl:

We had to try those regular fries as a “control,” to fully appreciate these massive chili cheese fries. These were awesome — topped with a hearty, beanless chili that had lots of flavor but wasn’t spicy, melty queso, diced green onions, jalapeños, and dollops of sour cream. The forks were appreciated.

Sauces included honey mustard, caffeinated barbecue sauce, and slightly spicy ketchup. I’m all about sauces, dips, and condiments, and these did not disappoint, especially as we took on those heroic portions of fries.

I’m hardly ever down on I-Drive. In fact, I try to avoid that side of Orlando. I might not even be back in the area until MegaCon 2020 (or unless a comedian I like comes to the Improv first), but I’d totally return to Hopdoddy Burger Bar next time I’m down that way. It’s a fantastic new option and a great value amid the pricey, upscale chain restaurants and basic bar food of Pointe Orlando, and who doesn’t appreciate a tasty burger?

Chain Reactions: Krystal (the all-you-can-eat adventure)

When it comes to food, almost everyone has a guilty pleasure. Maybe yours is Cadbury Creme Eggs (wisely bought on sale after Easter and saved in the depths of your freezer so you can enjoy one every month of the year that follows when nobody else has any), or trashy frozen French bread pizzas that remind you of hanging out at your friends’ houses in high school, or possibly even intimidating sandwiches you painstakingly assemble using two of those French bread pizzas in place of a sub roll, like a true sandwich artiste (particularly going for that self-destructive streak too many artists share). It might be something as simple as ice cream, or fries, or fries dipped in said ice cream. You might have a love-hate relationship with these foods. Indulging might make you feel bad physically after the initial rush of excitement and joy, but you can’t help yourself. Or they might bring you to a happy and comfortable place at the time, but then you feel shame or depression later on, like so many dysfunctional relationships.

After a disastrous attempt at the keto diet back in 2017, I now firmly believe we should eat whatever we want, just maybe a little bit less of it at each sitting, and maybe not indulge quite as often. But life is full of pain and suffering and misery and unhappiness, and it’s all over much too quickly. I say we should just take our pleasures where we can find them — ideally with some modicrum of moderation — and not feel too guilty.

Of course, that’s easier said than done when when of your (by which I mean my) guiltiest food pleasures are cheese Krystals, tiny little cheeseburgers served with mustard, onions, and a pickle slice on soft steamed buns. Krystals (sometimes colloquially referred to as “sliders”) are the signature item from the fast food chain Krystal (https://krystal.com/). If this sounds familiar, you might be thinking of White Castle, a fast food chain located throughout the Northern U.S. We don’t have White Castle here (and I’ve never had a chance to go to one), but Krystal is the Southern equivalent. Founded in 1932 in Chattanooga, Tennessee, Krystal’s website claims it is the second-oldest fast food restaurant. Locations are decorated in white and red and have a bit of a retro feel to them, and they’re usually sparkling clean and bright.

As you might guess, the Krystal burgers are very cheap (being a product of the Great Depression), remaining one of the better fast food values today. They are meant to be consumed in mass quantities, and as you might also guess, they are not exactly health food. I usually only go to Krystal once or twice a year, and luckily I have to drive out of my way to go to one, keeping it a rare indulgence. When I go, I usually order a dozen cheese Krystals, and each soft little slider is lovingly tucked into a cardboard sleeve with one open side. I’ll reach into the bag on my passenger seat and wolf down several of them before I even make it home. Hey, I’m not proud.

But perhaps in an attempt to reach out to people like me, Krystal recently instituted an all-you-can-eat deal, offering unlimited Krystals and fries for $5.99. (This deal is for dining in only. You can’t get it to go, and you can’t leave and come back later and hope to get more.) I had to try it, for the sake of this food blog and my dozens of vaguely-interested readers. I figured I would live-blog my experience as I ate more and more sliders, perhaps chronicling my physical and mental decline, and to see how long I could stay in the restaurant, how many they would be willing to serve at a time, whether I could beat my previous Krystal record of eating twelve, and whether or not I’d wear out my welcome before I tapped out. I love the state of journalism in 2019, don’t you?

Here’s a twist: I don’t think Krystal’s fries are anything special, so perhaps for the first time in the very short history of their all-you-can-eat deal, I asked them to hold the fries and just give me cheese Krystals. (The incredulous cashier said “Are you sure? The fries are included!”) Just so ya know, the cheese is a $2 upcharge, but I think it’s totally worth it, as long as we’re indulging. I also ordered a drink, a Sprite slushie for $1. Hey, big spender!

So instead of giving you a tray laden with a precarious leaning tower of burgers like an old Jughead comic book cover, they start you out with four at a time. If I had wanted fries, they would have given me a regular order of fries to begin with as well.

Well, these sliders slide down real easy, so it wasn’t long before I went back to the counter and asked for a re-up. Luckily they weren’t busy. You can tell some time has passed because I drank about a third of the Sprite slushie with the first round. Here’s round two: four more cheese Krystals.

I took my time with those soft, squishy, oniony, mustardy, cheesy little monsters, but I wasn’t ready to surrender to the sweet embrace of oblivion yet. Like I said, my record for Krystals consumed had been twelve — sadly my usual order for the once or twice a year I drive through. Whatever happened, I wanted to at least top that. Why, you ask? I couldn’t really tell you, dear Saboscrivnerinos. Bragging rights? I hardly think this is anything to brag about.

So I asked the nice lady for an order of five more, just so I’d have thirteen in all, and I could reevaluate my options after that. She didn’t even argue with me. I was clearly a man who came to play, who meant business, who could hold his sliders with the best of them. Here they are, the Furious Five with no Grandmaster Flash in sight, and one-third of the slushie remaining.

In case there was any doubt remaining, I inhaled them.

And you know what? After that, I made what might have been the smartest move I made that day — I called it a day. Walked away while I was still on top (so to speak), quit while I was ahead (arguably), didn’t foolishly try to hit some arbitrary new Krystal milestone like 20, or doubling my old record with 24.

I ate thirteen of those things, and they were delicious, and I got it out of my system (pun very much intended). I don’t need to return to Krystal for a while now — I’m good! By the time I make it back, this dangerous all-you-can-eat deal will probably be over, and that’s fine with me. I did the unthinkable that day, fearless readers, and lived to tell about it. It was an intense 15 minutes that afternoon, let me tell you!

Luke’s Kitchen and Bar

Luke’s Kitchen and Bar (http://eatatlukes.com/) is in a beautiful, modern, comfortable location along 17-92 in Maitland, nestled between Winter Park and Casselberry, and easily accessible via I-4. The restaurant location has been a few other things over the years, including a Steak & Ale location for the longest time. However, Luke’s owner/operator Brandon McGlamery (who also runs the tony Luma and Prato on Park Avenue in nearby Winter Park) has the business skills and culinary talent to make Luke’s a success.

I recently visited Luke’s for the first time with some colleagues, just in time for happy hour. Fun was had by all, and I would definitely return. Dear readers, please keep in mind I did not order nor eat all of this food. This was everything that five people shared.

Fresh potato chips served with a high-class version of French onion dip (that might have had a bit of bleu cheese blended in). These were a crowd-pleaser. The chips were thin, light, and crispy; not greasy at all, and not too crunchy like kettle chips.

French fries with thyme, rosemary, and sea salt. I didn’t order these. They were perfectly okay, but I will always choose chips over fries.

A mid-Atlantic take on a chilled shrimp cocktail, with the shrimp seasoned with Old Bay:

This was my wee little fried oyster po’boy. It was on the happy hour menu for the shocking price of $4, so I figured “How could I go wrong?” Well, it was delicious, but it was the size of a slider. Maybe I should not have been surprised, but it was so tasty I wasn’t disappointed.

Following the trend of wee foods, Luke’s supposedly has amazing deviled eggs. I didn’t feel like a whole order of them, so I was overjoyed when our patient server said I could order just one, to try it. It was one of the better deviled eggs I’ve ever had, garnished with excellent crispy shallots and tasty shishito pepper jam that was the shi-shit.

Roasted eggplant dip (AKA babganoush), served with cucumber, mint, and multigrain toast. I don’t think I even tried this one, but my babaganoush-loving co-worker was really happy with it.

A very good and very thicc cheeseburger, from the happy hour menu. Served simply with lettuce, tomato, PICKLED onion (niiiice), and I think there were pickles on it too (which I’m getting better at eating and enjoying). It came out a perfect medium-rare, and was extremely juicy. I offered my friends a chance to try this one, but it ended up being all mine.

I ordered these for the group, because I am a class act: outstanding fluffy Parker House rolls, served with the most delicious caramelized honey butter (spread onto the wooden serving board in the background). You can never go wrong with Parker House-style yeast rolls.

And the coup de grace: mussels, which I ordered to share with everyone, but these were most decidedly NOT on the happy hour menu, so they cost around $20. They did, however, come garnished beautifully with tomato, fennel, purple basil, and grilled, oil-rubbed sourdough bread. They were great, but we all would have been fine without them.

So Luke’s is definitely a solid choice for happy hour, or lunch or dinner if you prefer. It could be a great destination if you’re planning to catch a movie afterwards in Winter Park or at the Enzian, our beloved art-house movie theater right near the restaurant in Maitland. Luke’s location is perfect if you’re considering a romantic after-dinner stroll around lovely Lake Lily, essentially across the street. Happy hour would be ideal for that, since the park stays open until sunset.

Luke’s has a large menu, attentive staff, and my colleagues who ordered cocktails seemed over-the-moon pleased with them. Chef McGlamery and his crew seem to be doing everything right. Whether you’re there to hang out with friends, celebrate with family, impress a hot date, or just decompress after a long work week, I think you will agree. I hate to be the guy that says this, but Luke’s, the Force will be with you… always.

Chain Reactions: Zero Degrees

EDITOR’S NOTE: At some point in late 2022, Zero Degrees in West Orlando closed, but another location near Orange Blossom Trail and Sand Lake Road remains open.

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The other day I drove further west than I’ve ever driven before, in my almost 15 years in Orlando. There’s a whole “Chinatown” west of downtown, even past Taste of Chengdu, with lots of Asian markets and restaurants, as well as a Caribbean supermarket. It felt like I unlocked a new level in a video game, venturing to an unfamiliar new area and discovering all kinds of exciting, even legendary places to eat and explore in the future.

I went out that way on a quest for a certain kind of hot sauce, after coming up empty at three much closer Asian markets. I finally found it at the Tan Tien Oriental Market, and a few doors down from it, I stumbled upon Zero Degrees (https://zerodegreescompany.com/). It immediately felt like a Southern California sort of place due to a lot of Mexican and Asian fusion food and beverages, and the website confirmed it was founded in (that other) Orange County.

Zero Degrees has an eclectic menu full of frosty, sweet, refreshing (non-alcoholic) drinks, including fruit slushes, sweet shakes, limeades, milk teas (including Thai iced tea), green teas, Vietnamese iced coffee (with sweetened condensed milk, so good!), and Mexican horchata (sweetened rice milk), which can all be ordered with or without chewy boba pearls made from tapioca. They even have a Splitcup: a cup split down the middle into two separate compartments, so you can order two drinks in the same cup without having them mix together, for $5.50.

The food menu is snack-focused, featuring different variations of fries, nachos, elotes (Mexican street corn), chicharrones (pork rinds), and macaroni and cheese with a variety of toppings, including cheese, carne asada beef, and crushed Flamin’ Hot Cheetos. I knew carne asada fries is a real L.A. thing. They also have wings and crispy popcorn chicken bites, in salt and pepper or honey barbecue flavors.

I was in a hurry and had a hard time deciding, but I went with the garlic noodle dish (a larger entree, but still only $6), stir-fried in butter and garlic, with melty Cotija cheese and topped with grilled carne asada beef (a $3.50 upcharge). You can also get it with shrimp (also $3.50) and/or an egg ($1.50). It was great. Really rich, probably horrible for me, but it hit the spot. The beef had a hint of lime to it, and I’m sure it would be great over the other items on the menu, like the fries.

I also ordered Zero Degrees’ signature drink, the Mangonada ($6), a fresh mango slush with chamoy (a salty-sweet-sour sauce made from pickled plums or apricots that made its way to Mexico from China), Tajin (a spicy chili-lime spice powder that is popular sprinkled on fruit in Mexico), and topped with chunks of fresh mango. They asked me if I wanted my Mangonada spicy or not spicy, and I chose spicy. It has a lot of nice flavor, but it wasn’t “burn your tongue” spicy in the least. We have a bottle of Tajin at home, and we’ve found it is great on certain fruit, especially melons. It worked beautifully with the mango in the drink. And this was my first experience trying chamoy, so now I want to try it in other things, too!

If that straw looks weird, it’s because it is coated with spicy-tangy-fruity-sweet-sour-salty-chewy tamarind candy, making a unique sensory and taste experience. The tamarind candy straw was also a $1 upcharge, but I figured “Why not?”, especially since I live so far from this place. I admit the straw was more hassle than it was worth, especially since it didn’t extend past the plastic lid when touching the bottom of the cup. Also, it was messy, sticky, and hard to bite the chewy candy off the plastic, especially while driving. I don’t think I’d bother to get that straw again, but I’m glad I tried it.

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I returned to Zero Degrees a few days later, even though it’s quite a distance away, because I wanted to explore the Chinatown area further. (Stay tuned, Saboscrivner Society of America!) I also really wanted to try the strawberry limeade and strawberry horchata, so the SplitCup was the perfect solution to my dilemma. Apologies for the pic, dear readers — it was an unseasonably hot January afternoon, and I drank most of the limeade before I got it home to take a (not even that) decent photo. They used fresh strawberries in both beverages that tasted just like my homemade strawberry smoothies do, with no extra sugar or sweet syrup added to them.

I also brought my wife an ube milkshake. The purple yam, popular in Filipino desserts, tasted more like vanilla to both of us, but it was a beautiful purple color (her favorite color), so I knew (hoped) she would like it. It came garnished with a toasted marshmallow (she loves those), some rainbow-colored sour belt chewy candy, and glittery purple sugar. If I actually used Instagram like a normal food blogger in 2019, this would be the kind of thing I’d be ‘Gramming about. But instead, you’re hearing it here first!

I don’t know when I’ll return to Zero Degrees because it’s literally across town, but I’m so glad I accidentally discovered it and took the time to try it twice in the same week. I’d love to go back and get the mac and cheese covered with Flamin’ Hot Cheeto dust, but I’ve done enough damage for this week. Eating healthy in 2019, yea yea!

Chain Reactions: Arby’s

Wait a minute! Is he really reviewing ARBY’S? (https://arbys.com/) He’s only had a food blog for two months and he’s talking about a fast food chain, and a critically-derided, notably un-hip fast food chain?

I try to be good. I try to support local restaurants AND avoid fast food as much as possible, but I’m only human. I’m a sucker for Krystal sliders, I have a nostalgic fondness for McDonald’s breakfasts (and was thrilled when they started offering all-day breakfast, even though I rarely partake), and Arby’s hits the spot more often than not (although I almost never go). Sure, I think of obnoxious little Sherri from The Simpsons (or was it her twin Terri?) whining “I’m so hungry, I could eat at Arby’s!”, which I think ruined it for a whole generation. But the truth is, Arby’s is cool. It’s always trying new things, taking risks, adding crazy new menu items, and killing it with social media marketing — and these gambles are working! Arby’s is the quirky, likable guy in a rom-com who might not end up with the girl, but he has a full and rich life with friends, hobbies, a good job, and you rooted for him and know he’s going to be okay.

I went twice in 2017, which was twice as often as I had gone in the previous decade. Once was to try their porchetta sandwich while it lasted (surprisingly good), and the other time was to try their venison steak sandwich the one special day they offered it (incredibly good). Yes, this is a fast food chain people regularly crack on, but they’re rolling out porchetta, a pretty classy Italian pork preparation that you rarely even see on menus at Italian restaurants and takes some real talent and patience to make at home, and venison, which is almost impossible to get unless you’re friends with hunters. They’re not just adding bacon or chips or (eurgh) sriracha (sorry, it’s nasty!) to the same tired old offerings. They’re introducing people to entirely new meats, which is a noble and ambitious undertaking!

So yesterday, my best friend sent me this entertaining and insightful essay about the new golden age of Arby’s, and I was impressed by the writer’s obvious passion and enthusiasm, something I always try for here on The Saboscrivner.

He touched on all my thoughts more eloquently and at greater length than I would, so I’m not even going to try to top it. But I am extremely suggestible when it comes to food, so of course that means I had to try Arby’s again. I went today for lunch, and I have no regrets.

Their current limited-time special is the Smokehouse beef short rib sandwich, served with melty cheddar cheese, crispy onions, and barbecue sauce on Texas toast. I’m always happy to find Texas toast, whether it’s made into garlic bread, served as a sandwich, or just lightly toasted and buttered and served with some Zaxby’s chicken tenders. This sandwich was a real winner. I have to admit, it was better than some sandwiches I’ve had from barbecue restaurants. It was a decent size, with lots of flavors and textures going on, and the shredded, smoked short rib was very tender and tasty. The Texas toast held everything together well. I’m always disappointed when some barbecue places serve their wondrous, lovingly-prepared, low-and-slow-smoked meats on the cheapest buns or white bread, but not so here.

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I had also recently been advised to try Arby’s gyro and their onion rings, a combo I enjoyed at Theo’s Kitchen earlier this summer (see my recent review here). I knew they had a gyro, but it never occurred to me to try it until a few people vouched for it. And like I said, there’s no such thing as a bad gyro, right? Well, this one was better than some I’ve had from dedicated Mediterranean and Middle Eastern restaurants. It certainly wasn’t the best gyro I’ve ever had, but it was far from the worst, and only $3.99. This was the good kind of pita bread — nice and soft, like you get from actual gyro shops but never find at the supermarket. They included a generous portion of thin-sliced, processed gyro meat, which is usually a salty, garlicky beef and lamb combo, plus tzatziki sauce, shredded lettuce, sliced tomatoes, and thin slices of onion.

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I can’t say the same for the onion rings, which had that craggy, crumby breading that mostly fell off. I can’t Ring the Alarm! in good conscience for these rings. At least Arby’s has some good dipping sauces in pumps: their legendary Horsey sauce (creamy horseradish), very decent three-pepper sauce that is more like a spicy-sweet barbecue sauce than an actual hot sauce (which is more than fine with me), and a creamy Dijon mustard sauce.

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Finally, because this was a hectic week and we’re heading into our busiest and most stressful time of the year at work, I treated myself to an orange cream shake, because orange shakes are hard to find, and I freakin’ love them.

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I also brought back a Jamocha shake for one beloved co-worker and two cherry turnovers for another one. Food gifts are some of the best gifts, if you ask me.

So yeah, Arby’s. If you haven’t had it since you were a teenager, or if pop culture has conditioned you to think it can’t possibly be any good, think again, and try it again. Even if you don’t love their old-school roast beef sandwiches (tasty, but super-salty), they have a ton of newer menu options including the limited-time Smokehouse beef short rib, and I definitely vouch for that. Their seasoned curly fries might be the best in the game, and I wish I had gotten those instead of the onion rings. Nowadays they have Italian subs, Reubens, smoked brisket sandwiches, and even some healthy-looking options! Seriously, try it, and I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.