Noodles – The Saboscrivner

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles

Back in 2019, when I took my wife to New York City for our tenth anniversary, one of the many delicious restaurant meals I had was takeout from Xi’an Famous Foods, a casual restaurant specializing in hand-ripped biang biang noodles and spicy braised meats from the city of Xi’an in northwestern China. It was like no other style of Chinese food I’ve ever had before, and I’ve been saying for years that even with Orlando’s breadth and depth of various regional Chinese cuisines, we have desperately needed a place like that. Well, we finally have one!

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles (https://www.instagram.com/slap.noodles.usa) opened back in November 2025, at 6532 Carrier Dr Ste B, Orlando, FL 32819, right off International Drive, a little north of Sand Lake Road. It has been a popular destination ever since, with influencers aplenty sharing videos of chefs slapping and stretching dough to make perfectly long, chewy noodles from scratch and diners slurping them up. I’ve been wanting to try it ever since it opened, and I finally made it over there yesterday with my best friend, after surviving yet another MegaCon. (We went to The Whiskey two years ago and Fogo de Chao, which I somehow still haven’t reviewed, last year.)

I’ve been so good lately about not drinking my calories, but I figured our food would be spicy, so I treated myself to a sweet drink from SLAP!’s beverage cooler, this interesting-looking honey pomelo drink. After I chose it, I found a small English language label on the back that described it as honey grapefruit tea. It was so sweet and refreshing and delicious, and I loved it, especially as a nice treat after a grueling day.

It was way too hot for bowls of soup, so my friend and I both chose chili SLAP! noodle bowls, sans soup. He got the signature three-way chili SLAP! noodles, which we learned was a combination of three of their other bowls that can be ordered separately: sliced pork, tomato and egg, and vegetable (which included cubed potatoes, celery, and carrots at the bottom. They also included bok choy, bean sprouts, and lots of chili oil and chili powder. It looks fiery, but believe it or not, it was a lot milder than it looks. There were a bunch of those perfectly al dente biang biang noodles under there, don’t worry!

I got the beef short rib chili SLAP! noodles (no soup for me either), because short ribs are up there with oxtails and lamb shanks as rich, flavorful, unctuous cuts of meat I have a hard time turning down. It has the same kind of seasoning and also included bok choy (which I like) and bean sprouts (which I don’t care for, so I’ll know to ask them to hold the bean sprouts on future visits). I loved that they included a pair of kitchen shears for cutting the short rib, which I wish more restaurants would give you. A few well-placed snips separated all the tender meat from the giant bone, and a few more cuts turned it into bite-sized pieces. I got two meals out of this giant portion, which I’m getting so much better at.

I forgot to get a good picture of the actual hand-ripped biang biang noodles at the restaurant, but here they are in my leftovers, back at home. At the restaurant, we only ate with chopsticks. These noodles are awe-inspiring, and the chili seasoning is addictive. I suspect these dishes would still be too spicy for my wife, parents, brother, and in-laws, who hate anything beyond “mild,” but I think most people will find the taste pleasant and the spicy level nowhere close to overwhelming.
By the way, watch how you dress at SLAP!, because it is too easy to splatter a good shirt with that chili oil. I’ve been wearing the same beloved shirt to comic book conventions for 25 years to pose for pictures with comic writers and artists, a running gag that only I appreciate. Luckily, I had the foresight to pack an expendable T-shirt to change into when we got to the restaurant to protect The Shirt.

I was also excited to try one of the “crispy pancake” sandwiches at SLAP!, and I went with cumin lamb. Lamb is probably my favorite protein of all time (not including cured Italian meats), and I still remember the spicy cumin lamb “burger” I got at Xi’an Famous Foods in 2019. In that earlier review, I described it as being served on “a crispy flatbread bun that was like a cross between a pita and an English muffin, in terms of texture.” Here at SLAP!, the flavorful lamb was served on roujiamao, which is more like a flaky paratha or roti, a flatbread I’ve described many times as being the love child of a croissant and a flour tortilla. This roujiamao was much flakier, with more crispy layers, than the typical roti you may have had at Hawkers Asian Street Fare (which you can also buy frozen, as I suspect Hawkers does). This didn’t have that rich, buttery flavor either, but it complimented the cumin lamb very well, and it was fun to eat it.

My friend and I each took a few bites, and we still had some left over that I finished for lunch today. This was a hit, and you can also order the crispy pancakes with braised beef or braised pork. Next time! And yes, there will be a next time.

Finally, we also tried some skewers, because we know how to party, and how often will be able to make it back here? It’s across town from me, and my dude lives in Miami! Homestead, actually! All the skewers at SLAP! are served in orders of four for a very reasonable $5.99 each, but you can’t mix and match. That’s how we ended up with a dozen skewers. The four on the left are Chinese sausage, which was both of our favorites. They were grilled and coated with the same chili spice blend, but they weren’t like the chewy and slightly sweet lap cheong I expected, which I love in fried rice.

The four skewers in the middle are beef, which were also grilled and coated with the same chili spicy powder. They were chewy and not terribly tender, and not juicy at all, but at least they tasted good. The four crispy chicken skewers on the right were disappointing, though. My friend was spot-on when he called them “basic.” I’ve had spicy chicken nuggets from Wendy’s with more flavor, so at least I know to skip them on future visits. The sauce on the right side that looks like it’s about to spill (we didn’t let that happen) was reminiscent of Thai sweet chili sauce, but not nearly as sticky or sweet. That sauce and the chili spice on the left helped make the crispy chicken skewers somewhat more interesting, but I’d still order something else next time. Maybe an order of dumplings, which you can get with lamb, beef and onion, pork and cabbage, or pork, shrimp, and chive.

Vegetarians, there aren’t a ton of options for you at this meat-centric restaurant, but you can safely get the vegetable chili SLAP! noodles, vegetable noodle soup, and a couple of different skewers: enoki mushrooms with tofu skin, cilantro with tofu skin, or “fish tofu,” which I’m assuming is tofu reminiscent of fish, and and not a combination of fish and tofu. If you are ovo-vegetarians, you could also do the tomato and egg chili SLAP! noodles or tomato and egg noodle soup.

And since I always check (on behalf of my wife), there are a few half-booths along the side wall at SLAP!, in addition to plenty of tables. Napkin dispensers hang from the ceiling above each table, which you’ll appreciate due to needing a lot of napkins for meals like this, and also for the space they save on the tabletops. (Short people, your mileage may vary).

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles is definitely worth all the hype. I would have liked to get there sooner, but better late than never. Now I look forward to returning, but I wanted to publish this review as soon as possible, for the handful of you out there who haven’t already jumped on the bandwagon. It’s another treasure for Orlando, especially when the options along International Drive are so chain-centric. As if there was any doubt, SLAP! slaps.

Sushi Island

Sushi Island (https://sushiislandwinterpark.com/) is a new all-you-can-eat sushi restaurant in Winter Park, at 227 S Semoran Blvd, just south of University Boulevard near Full Sail University. The owner completely remodeled what used to be a (bad) sports bar/restaurant called Arooga’s, and the dining room is modern, spacious, and welcoming.

I met a good friend and former work colleague for lunch here on a recent Saturday, and we had a grand time, catching up after far too long. He has lost a bunch of weight doing the low-carb, high-protein keto diet, and I recently started a weight loss plan myself, trying to eat fewer carbs and smaller portions. We both figured we would do our best to “be good” here, and neither of us ate ourselves into uncomfortable food comas (which I usually do in all-you-can-eat situations). I figured that alone is decent progress for me.

That freezer in the front contains single-serving cups of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry ice cream for dessert, but I can’t imagine saving enough room for ice cream. My friend and I definitely didn’t.

Sushi Island launched its website after our lunch a few weeks back, but I made sure to take clear, legible photos of the menu since they weren’t widely available online yet. Since we went for lunch on a Saturday, we got the dinner menu and dinner price of $34.95 per person. In addition to all the sushi on the other side, you can order appetizers, soups (including udon noodle soup), fried rice or noodles, tempura-fried chicken, shrimp, and vegetables, hibachi-grilled meats and vegetables, and breaded, fried chicken, pork, and salmon katsu.

Here is half of the sushi menu, including salads, appetizers, sushi and sashimi, and simple rolls, which are also available as cone-shaped hand rolls (which I’m never as big a fan of).

And here are all the sumptuous specialty rolls:
Just as an FYI, there are a few sushi rolls on this dinner menu that aren’t available on the weekday lunch menu, so check the website for the differences.

My friend started out with an order of three crispy fried gyoza dumplings. He ordered me one, but I passed. He liked them!

He also got this hibachi steak, a relatively small portion of cubed grilled steak with teriyaki sauce. I had one piece, which was more done than I prefer, but I didn’t come to Sushi Island for the steak.

I picked some of the fishy apps for us to share, starting with yellowtail jalapeno. This was just two thin slices of yellowtail over mixed greens with a dash of dressing and two slices of fresh jalapeno on top. We each had one piece of yellowtail, and it was a nice start to the feast of fish to come.

This was the similar tuna jalapeno, which we also liked:

This was tuna tataki, two lightly seared pieces of tuna with a peppery crust:

And this was the delicious mango salmon appetizer. I love raw salmon and I love mango, and I could have ordered a few of these.

This was the snow krab salad, made with shredded surimi (artificial crabmeat made out of pollock or cod), mixed with some mayonnaise and topped with crispy panko bread crumbs, served chilled. I really enjoyed this, but I already like the sweet taste of surimi a lot.

These were two green mussels, topped with spicy mayo. Mussels are one of my favorite shellfish. Don’t worry, these were cooked, not raw.

I ordered four pieces of smoked salmon sashimi and four pieces of saba (mackerel) sashimi, which is one of my favorites. When it comes to sushi or sashimi, mackerel is always lightly pickled, so it has a sweet, vinegary tang like my beloved pickled herring. I’ve never seen any sushi or sashimi garnished with a strawberry before, but I’ll allow it!I was expecting just the thin slices of fish because that’s what I recognize sashimi to be, but these were served with small balls of sushi rice underneath each one, so they were more like nigiri. I ate the rice because I ordered them, and I never like wasting food. Now that I know, I will request sashimi without the rice next time.

We each ordered two rolls. My buddy got the top two, and I got the bottom two. The top one was the Cow Boy roll, with shrimp tempura and spicy krab, topped with paper-thin slices of medium rare steak, scallions. The second one down is the Bubba Gump roll, with tempura-breaded and fried shrimp and snow krab inside, topped with steamed shrimp, avocado, spicy mayo, and jalapeño sauce. He was kind enough to share a piece, and it was a good combo with a blend of nice textures. The bottom two were mine, both recommended by our lovely server Leah: the Fat Boy roll and the Spicy Girl roll, which could be perfect descriptions of me and my wife. The Fat Boy roll (third one down) contains spicy tuna, shrimp tempura, and cucumber and is topped with tuna, salmon, avocado, spicy mayo. and eel sauce. The Spicy Girl roll (last but definitely not least) contains spicy yellowtail, spicy tuna, and avocado and is topped with spicy salmon, masago, white sauce, and eel sauce. I absolutely loved them and could have eaten far more than I did, but I really am trying my best to eat less these days, folks.

Finally, this was my last hurrah: the Naruto roll, with spicy tuna and avocado served in a beautiful, paper-thin spiral of cool, crispy, peeled cucumber, topped with masago, scallions, and ponzu sauce. This was such a nice treat, and since I already ate more rice than I hoped to, I was glad to find this good roll without rice. When I return to Sushi Island (and I WILL return), I will probably order several of these Naruto rolls. You can get them with different fish, too: regular tuna, salmon, yellowtail, or krab.

I was so glad to catch up with this friend of mine, who I have watched progress from dedicated law student to esteemed attorney to beloved law professor and head of an important department at my previous institution. He is one of the best people I know, and I kvell with pride to consider him one of my friends (and to be one of his!) — and that doesn’t even get into his skills as a drummer! And we could not have chosen a better place than Sushi Island, especially since we’re both eating less and eating healthier these days. I know I could have eaten a lot more sushi, but we both left satisfied, without being uncomfortably stuffed and bloated. That means we are making progress in every aspect of our lives! But Sushi Island was so good, and I am thrilled to have a place like it on my side of town, without schlepping down to International Drive for very similar all-you-can-eat sushi at Sushi Yama.

Pho Bar Vietnamese Kitchen

Pho Bar Vietnamese Kitchen (https://phobar.co/) has two locations in South Florida and one in Boston, but I didn’t label this review of its relatively new Orlando location with my “Chain Reactions” tag because it doesn’t feel like a chain… at least not yet. I recently went to Pho Bar for the first time, looked at the menu in person, but ordered everything as takeout to bring home to my wife.

She always wants summer rolls from any Vietnamese or Thai restaurant, so I brought her these two HUGE spring rolls (that’s what Pho Bar calls them, even though I think of spring rolls as the crispy deep-fried ones), with shrimp, pork, shredded lettuce, bean sprouts, and basil wrapped in rice paper and served with a peanut-hoisin sauce for dipping. These were much larger than most restaurants’ versions of summer rolls, and they came individually wrapped in plastic wrap. I should have waited for her to unwrap them before snapping this picture, but oh well.

I thought we would both enjoy splitting the grilled satay squid, which is always an impressive dish to me. The presentation is eye-catching for sure, with the grilled squid sliced into perfect rings and separate tentacles. It was seasoned with a chili soy marinade, and while I liked it, she didn’t love the flavor of this squid. It was chewier than we are both used to, and I give the edge to the similar-but-superior grilled squid at Z Asian Vietnamese Kitchen, just a few minutes east on Colonial Drive. The two sauces that came with the squid are ginger fish sauce, which was on the pungent side, and “green chili sauce,” which I really loved. It had a kick, but also a cool sort of flavor. I admit I used most of that sauce on some pork loin I marinated, roasted, and sliced very thin.

Like any good Vietnamese restaurant, Pho Bar packed our pho broth separately, so the rice noodles wouldn’t turn to mush while sitting in the hot brother. Unlike a lot of pho places, Pho Bar makes their rice noodles fresh in-house, and you can see they are wider than the traditional dried “rice sticks.” But for purists, they also offer traditional rice vermicelli instead. My wife always orders pho tai, with beef eye round, sliced paper-thin. It is always served rare, because it cooks in the steaming broth.

I will usually order pho dac biet, which comes with thin-sliced eye round, sliced brisket, chewy beef meatballs (nothing like Italian meatballs!), beef tendon, and tripe. But at Pho Bar, I was tempted by a more expensive option, pho suon bo, with brisket, meatballs, and short rib, which is a cut of beef I always love. Here’s my bowl before I added broth to it, but the short rib was too large to fit:

That was a whole meal in itself, so I ended up with the short rib standing alone at the end! It was a huge piece of meat, rich and marbled with fat, and the long bone slid right out. We had so much extra broth left over, I cooked up some noodles (the knife-cut Taiwanese noodles with fluted edges that I always keep in the pantry, not proper rice noodles for pho) and got a whole extra meal with that giant short rib.

And as we’re about to experience some unseasonably cold days here in the Orlando area, I still have even more of Pho Bar’s pho broth left over, so I have since bought some rice noodles for when I heat up the rest. This is going to be perfect weather for pho, which is why I’m publishing this review today, of all days.

I still contend the pho at my beloved Pho Huong Lan is the best in Orlando, and I am more likely to return there than to Pho Bar. But I’m certainly glad I tried the new place. It wasn’t bad by any means, even if neither of us loved the grilled squid. If you’re planning to dine in at Pho Bar, the restaurant itself is much nicer than Pho Huong Lan — less cramped, modern decor, comfortable booths. I expect it will do well in the Mills 50 neighborhood, even with so much competition within the same few blocks. It feels like more of a “date place,” complete with full bar (hence the name). The website lists a whole menu of cocktails in addition to beer, wine, and sake, or as hipster foodie influencers prefer to call it, a “cocktail program.”

Thailicious

Thailicious (https://thailiciousfl.com/) is a very casual Thai restaurant in the suburbs of Longwood. The building looks like a house, complete with outside tables on a covered, screened-in front porch. My wife and I have gone three times so far, and we really like it, enough to already consider ourselves semi-regulars. I want to work our way through the entire menu, but their dishes are so good, it is hard to not default back to past favorites.

My best advice for going for dinner is to arrive early, because it always gets super-busy. The people of Longwood know what’s good, and they also may not want to drive far and wide for newer, trendier Thai restaurants, knowing they have a wonderful, well-kept secret in their own back yard.

On all of our visits, my wife starts out with sweet, cool, creamy, slightly smoky Thai iced tea, her beverage of choice:

She usually orders summer rolls, one of her go-to favorites at any Vietnamese or Thai restaurant. Thailicious’ version comes with shrimp, rice noodles, carrots, and Thai basil leaves, wrapped in fresh rice paper for a chewy texture and served with a sweet peanut sauce.

On our first visit, we also ordered a crab rangoon appetizer, just for the heck of it. I hadn’t had crab rangoon in years, probably not since the days of the all-you-can-eat China Jade buffet on East Colonial Drive near Fashion Square Mall, but these were better than I remembered. They were fried to crispy perfection, not greasy or heavy at all, with sweet cream cheese inside (but nary a hint of crab, as usual).
These were so good, we got them again on our third visit.

The first time in, my wife ordered her go-to noodle dish, pad Thai, since we are now on a quest to discover all the best versions of pad Thai in and around Orlando. This was one of the best versions either of us have tried around here. The rice noodles were sauteed with pork (but you can also choose chicken, tofu, or beef or shrimp for a small upcharge), eggs, ground peanuts, bean sprouts, and green onions. The sauce was actually kind of tangy and citrusy for a change. A lot of places serve pad Thai that is too sweet, and it never has that tangy funk that I love.

I ordered my own go-to noodle dish, pad kee mao, also known as drunken noodles. These are wider, flatter noodles, sauteed with onions, bell peppers, carrots, zucchini (a nice touch that nobody else seems to add), fresh basil (so important to the overall flavor of this dish), and scallions, and I asked them to hold the bean sprouts. I also got pork as my meat of choice, and it was a wise choice. This was a delicious version of drunken noodles. The dish is always sweet, but I ordered mine medium-spicy, because I like my Thai noodles like I like my women, sweet and spicy. Next time I’ll try Thai-spicy, now that I know I can more than handle the medium-spicy baseline.
Well, my wife was brave enough to try the drunken noodles, and she loved them so much that she ordered them (mild, of course) on our second visit, and again on our third! I tell ya, this dish is a crowd-pleaser. If you’ve never tried them before, either at Thailicious or your Thai restaurant of choice, give them a chance, and you won’t be sorry. She wasn’t.

I tried something completely new and different on our second visit: a noodle curry dish from northern Thailand called khao soi, made with egg noodles, napa cabbage, pickled sweet peppers, and pork (instead of chicken or tofu). The noodles came in the creamy, medium-spicy curry kind of like a thick soup, and our very friendly and patient server gave me chopsticks with it, utensils you don’t usually get at Thai restaurants. It was nice gambling on a brand new, unfamiliar dish and enjoying it so much. I’d totally order it again, but that would also defeat my purpose of making my way through the Thailicious menu, as I intend to do in the months and years to come.

Get ready for the noodle pull!

It was so good, it inspired me to start ordering this dish elsewhere, to compare other restaurants’ versions to the first khao soi I’ve ever had here at Thailicious. You know what they say: You never forget your first time!

Then we got coconut sticky rice for dessert on visit number two, which we never order, but we loved it so much that we wondered why. What a delicious, sweet treat, especially topped with a huge scoop of creamy coconut ice cream! We haven’t been living right, avoiding sweet sticky rice, but better late than never.

On our third visit, I ordered the laab gai, a dish of ground chicken seasoned with lime juice, shallots, roasted rice powder, and scallions, served at the hot spice level, on a bed of fresh, crunchy iceberg lettuce. I am still relatively new to laab (sometimes called larb) after being introduced to an incredible version with ground pork at Isan Zaap Thai Cafe last year and then trying a chicken version at Lim Ros Thai Cuisine earlier this year. I would rank this one between the two.

I also got the spicy basil from their traditional spicy Thai dishes menu, with sautéed pork, sweet basil leaves, onions, zucchini, and red and green bell peppers, at a hot spice level. It came with a bowl of jasmine rice on the side, which I mixed in to soak up the delicious flavors. They always get the pork so tender here at Thailicious. In fact, not only are the flavors fresh and strong, but everything is the perfect consistency.

It was delicious, but I always return to noodle dishes, so I’ll give the edge to the fabulous drunken noodles, pad Thai, and that amazing khao soi from visit #2. Now that I’ve written a review with a good bit of variety, I will start returning to those old favorites, because I will definitely return to Thailicious.

Orlando has several Thai restaurants, many of which are new, hot, and trendy. This Longwood mainstay isn’t hot or trendy, but it is so damn good, without any pretension or attempts to be the new influencer-illuminati destination. That makes me love it even more. It’s a friendly neighborhood sort of place with next-level food, comfortable booths, and warm and welcoming service. Just don’t get there too late on Friday or weekend evenings, because the locals know what’s good, and you will have to wait!

Art’s Sandwich Shop

Art’s Sandwich Shop (https://artssandwichshop.com/) is another local legend — a family-owned restaurant that opened in 1972. As far as I’m concerned, that makes it a historic restaurant here in Orlando. When I recently visited its Orange Blossom Trail stand-alone building, it looked like very little has changed in the 50+ years since it opened, and I mean that in a good way — see also other venerable sandwich institutions like Beefy King and Gabriel’s Subs.

Longtime readers, the stalwart Saboscrivnerinos, know I will order an Italian sub wherever they are available. Art’s version is called the Stinger, and it comes with genoa salami, ham, capicola, provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato, onion, and vinaigrette dressing on a lightly toasted white sub roll.

It’s not the biggest or the fanciest Italian sub, but it really hit the spot. I liked how the roll was soft yet crispy from being toasted, along with the additional crunch of the shredded iceberg lettuce and onions, and the tangy sweetness of the dressing tying it all together and acting as a “sandwich lubricant.”

They offer homemade chili, which is something else I always feel obligated to try anytime I see it on a menu. Everyone’s version of chili is different, and as far as I’m concerned, there is something unique about every cup, bowl, or pot of chili that makes it worth sampling. Shredded cheese was a 50-cent upcharge, a no-brainer as far as I was concerned. It was a good, basic chili, the kind you might whip up on a cold day with some ground beef and stuff in your pantry and spice drawer, and there isn’t anything wrong with that!

I’m also a sucker for pasta salad, and I was surprised that Art’s pasta salad uses linguini noodles rather than something like elbows or twists, tossed in the same tangy-sweet Italian dressing with fresh diced tomatoes. That’s honestly a first for me.

I also ordered the cheesesteak, with thin-sliced (“flaked”) sirloin steak cooked on the flattop grill with onions and Art’s own special seasoning (I have no idea what the special seasoning is). I asked for grilled onions and hot peppers to be added on (they use banana peppers), and I enjoyed this one back at home.

I heated it up in the toaster oven, and it was tasty.

I still give the award to Cavo’s Bar & Kitchen and John and John’s – A Pizza Shop for serving the best Philly cheesesteak in Orlando (same sandwich, same owners), and I will go to bat for the non-traditional cheesesteak at the aforementioned Gabriel’s Subs, since it tastes like a White Castle or Krystal slider. But Art’s is such a classic, I’m still glad I tried it.

Art’s Sandwich Shop is so far out of the way for me, it took a special trip just to try it, but I’m glad I finally did, especially after 20+ years living in Orlando. It’s amazing to me how it has stayed in business in the mostly industrial area it’s in, without much of a “cool factor” to bring in diners from elsewhere in the city. But I think it’s the lack of a cool factor that makes Art’s cool. It’s completely unpretentious, old-school, and I’m sure they’re making everything the same exact way they always have. That kind of consistency is rare, and I’m sure their loyal fanbase appreciates them for it. Art’s is definitely one of those “if you know, you know” kind of restaurants, and now I know! (And knowing is half the battle.)

Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner

Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner (https://www.moakaidiner.com/) just opened the week before last in the old Mongolorian location at 2217 East Colonial Drive in Orlando, just west of Bumby Avenue. The restaurant is still in its soft opening phase, but it is fully open for business every day except Sunday. Sunday brunch hours will be added in due time. It is owned by the same owner of my beloved Poke Hana (honestly one of my favorite restaurants in Orlando since 2018) and Korean fried chicken joint Chi-Kin, which I still haven’t been to yet.

I love Hawaiian food, and Poke Hana is a big reason for that, since I’ve never actually been to Hawaii. Even before that, there was a short-lived Hawaiian restaurant in Oviedo called Hawaiian Grindz that introduced me to most Hawaiian dishes. Unfortunately, it didn’t last very long, perhaps because the owners seemed to be very laid-back, to the point of not always opening when their posted hours said they would.

Anyway, Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner is a very professional setup with a busy, happy-looking staff, all in festive aloha shirts. It is a classic diner layout with booths along the window, tables, stools overlooking an open kitchen (separated by a plexiglass screen) and more stools at the bar. For my first visit earlier this evening, I sat at the bar and placed my takeout order with the very friendly and welcoming Olivia, the bartender.

While I waited for my takeout, I ordered a POG juice. I remember how popular Pogs were in the early ’90s, especially at the comic book shops I used to frequent, and how quickly the Pog fad came and went. But don’t worry — POG juice is passion fruit/orange/guava juice, and it is so sweet and tangy and tasty. It is surprisingly thick and heavy, as fruit juices can sometimes be, but I already love all tropical fruits, especially passion fruit and guava, so I enjoyed it and highly recommend it.

(That is the ever-patient Olivia’s arm back there.)

After that, I also tried the lychee lemonade, since I am now a lemonade connoisseur. It was also wonderful, and a lot lighter and more refreshing than the POG juice. I would definitely order that again.

I placed a large order, figuring my wife and I would get four total meals out of everything, and it was ready quite quickly.

My wife requested the shoyu poke bowl, with cubes of raw ahi tuna marinated in house shoyu (soy) sauce with Hawaiian salt, shelled edamame soybeans, macadamia nuts, chili flakes, sweet onions, and dried seaweed called ogo. These are all flavors she likes (except the onions, which she figured out after one harsh bite), so she was really happy with it. She said she liked this poke even more than Poke Hana, where we have eaten dozens of times, so that’s high praise coming from her.

I couldn’t decide between a few things, so I ordered an assortment, hoping to share, and if not, knowing I’d have leftovers for tomorrow. These were the kalbi ribs, beef ribs marinated in shoyu and fruit juices, sliced across the bones, and grilled. They had a lot of flavor from the grilling process and were so tender. I always love peeling the flat bone slices out of kalbi and enjoying the almost chewy meat around the edges of the bone. Even my wife liked the piece she had.

All “plate lunches” at Moa Kai come with two scoops of white rice and one scoop of macaroni salad, but you can also choose different sides, and some require a nominal upcharge. I already know I love Hawaiian-style macaroni salad, including from Poke Hana, so I was looking forward to this, but instead of white rice, I got garlic pan-fried noodles, hoping my wife would want to try them. We both loved them! As great as the kalbi and macaroni salad were (and they were), these garlic noodles were the truth. Whenever we return, we will split a full-size order of them.

Kai Asian Street Fare on the edge of Casselberry and Winter Park makes the closest thing in town to these garlic noodles, and theirs are also awesome, just a little more buttery-greasy. But I had a lousy phone camera back then, so forgive the ugly, blurry shots in that early review.

I got a second plate lunch, the mix plate, where you can select two house favorites. For one of my choices, I went with the spicy ahi poke with cubed, marinated ahi tuna, sweet onion, masago, and crushed macadamia nuts in house-made spicy sauce (think spicy mayo), topped with scallions. This was fire! Poke is one of my favorite foods, whether from Poke Hana, Rion’s Ocean Room, or even Costco, and I especially love spicy ahi or salmon poke like this. It was a small serving, but that’s what happens in a sampler platter like this. I could eat this by the bucketful.

The other thing I ended up with was the grilled shoyu chicken, which was a shoyu-marinated, grilled boneless chicken thigh, topped with teriyaki sauce and scallions. It was so tender and juicy and well-seasoned, and I always say chicken thighs are the best part of the chicken, aside from the oysters. Thick thighs save lives! (And if you were intrigued by the garlic noodles above, the full-size order comes topped with this shoyu chicken.)
The only reason I said I “ended up with” it was because I ordered the Korean chicken instead, which sounds like it would have been similar shoyu-marinated chicken, but cubed, battered, fried, and tossed in house-made Korean garlic sauce. I am not disappointed at all that I ended up with the grilled chicken instead. It was a slightly healthier option, and so damn delicious, I would happily order it again. I don’t own a grill, merely because it is so blasted hot and humid in Orlando nine months out of the year, I know I wouldn’t use it much. Knowing myself, that would lead to all kinds of cognitive dissonance and self-resentment, and I deal with that enough already without feeling guilty about buying a grill and not using it often enough. But I always miss the flavor of good grilled meats, and the grilled shoyu chicken thigh was a perfect piece of chicken. WE HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOYU!

I got macaroni salad with this plate lunch too, but instead of the white rice, I got Spam fried rice for an upcharge. Spam is so good, y’all! It is the very definition of a “sometimes food,” as heavily processed and salty as it is, but fried up with rice or noodles and wrapped in rice and seaweed as a Spam musubi, it is tastier than you would believe. The Spam lovers know what’s up, and the squeamish among you will just have to take my word for it. This Spam fried rice didn’t have anything else in it (no eggs or vegetables), but just Spam and fried rice were great by themselves.

But wait, there’s more! That old Hawaiian restaurant in Oviedo introduced me to saimin, a Hawaiian noodle soup similar to Japanese ramen, but with Spam. Saimin soup with Spam is on the menu here at Moa Kai, but we’re still in August, and I couldn’t conceive of ordering soup. But I still had to try some form of saimin, so I got the local style stir-fried saimin noodles with char siu (Chinese-style barbecue pork with a slight sweetness that you may know and love from Kai Kai or Tasty Wok), Spam, sliced kamaboko (cured surimi, similar to the fish cakes in ramen), scrambled eggs, carrots, and scallions, seasoned with shoyu and dashi, a Japanese cooking stock flavored with fish and kelp.
I’m going to enjoy this tomorrow, but I couldn’t resist a few bites while it was still fresh and hot, and it was on point. It reminded me of a Hawaiian version of lo mein (but better) or Filipino pancit bihon. The char siu pork was sweet and tender, and the Spam was sliced into tiny cubes and perfected by the stir-fry process. You could enjoy these local style stir-fried saimin any day of the week, not just on stir-Friday.

My wife had requested an açaí bowl for a bit of a dessert tonight and breakfast tomorrow. This was a huge helping of açaí sorbet blended and topped with fresh strawberries, blueberries, pineapple, and kiwi, shredded coconut, peanut butter, and granola. Knowing it was sorbet, I brought a cooler in the car with a couple of reusable fake-ice blocks to keep it cold on the drive home, but it still got a little melty. The tiny taste I had when she had enough for the night was soooo nice and refreshing, though.

I had never even heard of açaí until a few years ago, when everyone started touting its benefits as a healthy “superfood.” I can’t speak on that, but the dark purple sorbet made from the açaí berries is a nice blend of sweet and tart, especially when mixed with other, sweeter fruits.

And finally, we were both curious about the ube haupia pie, so I guess that makes us pie-curious. I couldn’t resist ordering a piece for us to share. Haupia is coconut pudding, a popular Hawaiian dessert made from coconut milk, sugar, cornstarch, and water, and it is surprisingly jiggly and bouncy like Jell-O. Poke Hana serves haupia in crispy fried spring rolls, which are terrific, but this was different. Moa Kai serves their haupia in pie form with a macadamia nut-graham cracker crust (superb) with a layer of creamy ube pudding in between. Ube is a purple yam with a vanilla-like flavor, common in Filipino and Vietnamese desserts and sweet drinks, and it is as tasty as it is beautiful. Someone call Yam Grier and send me to Yamsterdam, because these were some sweet-ass yams under that haupia, with more bounce to the ounce.

Folks, I am thrilled to report that Orlando has another winner. We first heard earlier this year that Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner was coming, and months passed with no updates. The menu surfaced online back in April, and it all sounded so good, I hoped plans wouldn’t change, since some announced restaurants never see the light of day. It was so worth the wait, and all the time and effort and money they put into it are paying off. You can see we tried many things so I could write a worthy review and share as much information as possible. Yeah, that’s the ticket. The diner setting is going to be a fun, welcoming atmosphere for dining in, and the location, right in our Mills 50 district with so many other fantastic restaurants nearby, will hopefully help keep them busy and garner them the success they deserve. I don’t know if I’ll ever make it to beautiful Hawaii, but at least we can all have a taste of it right here in Orlando. Whether you dine in or order takeout like I did tonight, look for Olivia, who might be behind the bar. She is awesome, and even in the brief time I waited for my takeout order at the bar, she made me feel like a valued customer, patiently answered any questions I had, asked if I needed anything, and represented the restaurant so well.

The Cairo Express

The Cairo Express (https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61577118088141) is a brand-new food truck that first opened last month, on July 12th, 2025. It is always set up in the same place, next to a hair salon at 658 Wymore Rd, Winter Park, right off Lee Road facing the I-4 exit. After a friend brought it to my attention and I looked at the menu online, I went straight there the next day, after seeing the Fantastic Four movie at nearby Winter Park Village. The Cairo Express is a family affair, with a pedigree of serving delicious Egyptian food in Orlando years before opening this truck. When I ordered, I noticed some uncommon menu items that I tried way back in 2019 when I reviewed an Egyptian restaurant called Makani, out on International Drive. I caught up with an old friend and bandmate and had a fantastic dinner there, and we shared several dishes I haven’t seen anywhere since. The fella in charge at the food truck confirmed his mother worked at Makani, and those were her family recipes they prepared there and again here at The Cairo Express. That food was awesome, and I knew I would be in for a real treat, trying it again so many years later.

Here is the menu, kindly provided by The Cairo Express after I forgot to take a photo and reached out to them on Facebook. You can see prices are very reasonable, and I can tell you everything is totally worth it:

This was the beef shawarma, which I devoured in the car while it was hot and fresh. It’s a wrap with beef, onions, tomatoes, cilantro, pickled turnips, and tahini sauce (creamy sesame paste), then grilled on the flattop grill to add some crispiness to the outer texture of the thin flatbread, like the best burritos. I love crunchy, tangy pickled vegetables, and the pickled turnips really made this shawarma something special. I’ve been disappointed by a lot of shawarma with dry, bland beef (or chicken), but this beef was really tender and juicy.

Here’s a cross-section, so you can see that tender beef for yourself. I always say that gyros are to tacos as shawarma is to burritos, in terms of shape and structure. I wouldn’t dare eat a gyro in my car, but the shawarma held up just fine.

I love liver in all its forms, from chopped chicken liver at a Jewish deli to liver and onions at an old-school diner. So I was surprised and excited to see a sandwich with marinated beef liver with green bell peppers, garlic, cumin, coriander, cilantro, and tahini sauce on a hoagie roll. I could not turn that down! Looking in the food truck window, I saw they use Cusano’s hoagie rolls, which I make a special trip to Gordon Food Service to buy. The nearby LaSpada’s Original Philly Cheese Steaks and Hoagies uses them, and I believe Gabriel’s Subs might as well. Great roll, and the entire sandwich was superb. The liver was so rich and tender. I personally would have loaded the sandwich up with onions too — sautéed with the liver, as well as some crispy fried ones — as well as some spicier peppers and/or hot sauce for some acid to cut the salty richness, but that’s just me.

Just as gyros are to tacos and shawarma is to burritos, the lesser-known Egyptian street food hawawshi is to quesadillas — except there is no cheese in hawawshi. Instead, it is spiced ground beef with onions, garlic, and parsley, stuffed into pita bread and grilled on the flattop grill to get that great crispy texture. Hawawshi is magical. You get four equal wedges, and mine came with a little cup of tahini for dipping. The menu mentioned I could have gotten hot sauce instead, which I would have preferred to try, but I was a little overwhelmed when ordering and didn’t think to ask. I had hawawshi for the first time at Makani back in 2019, and it was just as good there. I think the outer texture was crispier, almost like it had been fried, but this was great too.

Koshary is a famous Egyptian street food that I also tried for the first time at Makani. How could I resist a mountain of rice pilaf, lentils, spaghetti, elbow macaroni, tomato sauce, crispy fried onions, and chickpeas? It’s a carb-lover’s dream and a perfect snack for vegetarians and vegans too. The version of koshary from The Cairo Express came with an extra ramekin of tomato sauce and two ramekins of a vinegar sauce. I didn’t add any of either, because I wanted my wife to try it, and she doesn’t care for saucy, spicy, pungent foods (while I, on the other hand, can’t get enough of ’em). Once I ate the tomato sauce and onions off the top, we shared the rest of the koshary, and she enjoyed it as much as I did.

This baba ganoush was my wife’s sole request, since the smoky, creamy roasted eggplant dip is one of her favorite foods. She’s not a dipper like I am, but she will go through it with a spoon! She has high standards for baba ganoush, and she said Cairo Express’ version was one of the best in Orlando. I tried a tiny taste too, and I detected a lot of tahini (sesame paste) in there, while some go harder on the actual eggplant.

I returned to The Cairo Express the following Saturday because they had a weekend special that was another dish I was introduced to at Makani. These are mombar (pronounced with the emphasis on the “bar” rather than the “mom”), savory sausages made of rice seasoned with various herbs and spices, stuffed into a chewy lamb intestine. I swear I tasted cinnamon and clove in them. I believe the mombar are boiled and then fried until their texture is lightly crispy but also chewy. They are so delicious and fun to eat.

And I got a little piece of baklava that was good, because you can never go wrong with baklava!

On my second visit to the truck, I met Gigi, the matriarch of the family who cooked at Makani for years, then left after new owners took over, and is back in action at The Cairo Express. She was so sweet, and her son was very affable when I met him on my first visit. I’ll definitely be back. You should check them out too, as soon as possible. Even if you like Mediterranean and Middle Eastern food, the unique Egyptian dishes they offer like hawawshi, koshary, and mombar may be completely new to you. I think people will especially love the hawawshi and koshary (and vegetarians and vegans, don’t sleep on the koshary!). You can also try familiar favorites like shawarma and falafel and compare them to other versions you’ve eaten elsewhere. I highly recommend The Cairo Express and wish this lovely family all the good luck in the world.

CLOSED: Candee Lee’s Soul House

EDIT: I learned that Candee Lee’s Soul House permanently closed in October 2025, barely two months after I wrote my review! What a damn shame. The food was really good.

***

Candee Lee’s Soul House (https://candeeleessoulhouse.com/) is the dream of Chef Tony Tone Blakey, a Culinary Institute of Virginia alumnus, a former chef at Walt Disney World, and a personal chef. Inspired by his mother, the titular Candee Lee, he opened his soul food restaurant in a touristy stretch of Irlo Bronson Highway in Kissimmee, Florida, in March of 2025, and I had been wanting to make it down there to try it for a long time.

Anyone who knows me and my family would not be surprised to learn I did not grow up eating soul food, but it a nostalgic treat to me every time. I discovered soul food the summer between my junior and senior years of high school. As a teenager obsessed with the TV series ER, I thought I might study to become a doctor, and somehow I scored a prestigious(?) internship at the University of Miami School of Medicine in downtown Miami. I felt like such an accomplished and sophisticated adult, taking the Metrorail from suburban Kendall into downtown every morning and home every evening, even though I was placed in a hematology research lab and assisted with mundane experiments that never seemed to cure any diseases. A lot of the time, they drew my blood to use as the “control” for the daily experimentation, adding insult to injury for this young, unpaid intern. The highlight of those long and frustrating internship days was eating lunch in the med school cafeteria, where every day they offered a cheap daily special that was usually soul food.

That summer internship made me realize I had no future as a medical researcher or a patient-facing doctor, but I fell in love with ham hocks and collard greens, fried cabbage and yams, and my beloved oxtails — one of my favorite meals to this day. I looked forward to those nourishing lunches so much, knowing my days would be halfway over at that point, and I still think about that cafeteria soul food today. It could be said that I’ve been chasing those tastes ever since.

Anyway, there have never been many soul food options in Orlando. I loved Nikki’s Place when I reviewed it a few years back, a historic restaurant located in Parramore, near downtown Orlando. But when I learned Chef Tony Tone had opened his own restaurant, I couldn’t wait to try it, even though it was much further from home. Well, while Nikki’s Place has the old-school atmosphere of the soul food restaurant from The Blues Brothers, Candee Lee’s Soul House is modern, full of natural light and bright red and blue painted walls, and located in a suburban strip plaza, looking a bit like a fast food spot. I had a rare Wednesday off work this week, so I drove down there with a friend to try it for the first time.

I took the liberty of photographing the menu displays on the wall, since they didn’t quite match up with the menu on the website. You can choose between lunch plates with one entree and one side (only Monday through Thursday, from 12 to 3 PM) or dinner plates with one entree and two sides (any day, anytime). The entrees include chicken (either fried wings or garlic and herb-roasted leg quarters), boneless fried catfish filets, and fried bone-in pork ribs (three for the lunch or six for the dinner).
There are also chicken or fish sandwiches which are supposed to come with coleslaw, homemade pickles, and one side, which I did not read carefully at the time. (More on that later.) The chicken and fish sandwiches ($12 and $15, respectively) are half-price on Wednesdays, which was one of the reasons I timed my first visit for a Wednesday.

Here is the menu of sides and drinks. I wanted to try most of the sides, and between my friend and I, I got to try five, which isn’t bad at all.

My friend and I didn’t have the sheer numbers necessary to order the Family Box (which serves 4-5) or the Big Mama (which serves 7-8), but here is the information, for anyone who might live or vacation down that way with a large group:

At this point I should note that it is a long, thin restaurant space, where you order on the far end of the counter and pay closer to the door, and the only seating is a series of red stools along a long counter on the opposite wall. There aren’t any tables, and I’m sure a lot of people get their food to go.

My friend, a Mississippi boy, ordered the fried catfish dinner, which came with two huge filets. He let me try a piece, and it was excellent. I loved the breading. It is definitely some of the best fried catfish I’ve had anywhere around here (up there with my favorite seafood restaurant High Tide Harry’s, and of course the iconic Nikki’s Place).
For his sides, he got the collard greens with smoked turkey and the “Better than ya mama’s” grits. I’m not a big grits guy, but I tried a bite of his, and it was definitely better than any grits I’ve tried anywhere else. They were buttery and rich and a bit gritty, and definitely not instant grits (as no self-respectin’ Southernah uses instant grits). Chef Tony Tone definitely takes pride in his grits.

The whole reason I planned to take a Wednesday off work just to drive the hour each way to Candee Lee’s Soul House was to try their oxtails, which are only served on Wednesdays. We got there a few minutes after they opened at noon, but when I asked for the oxtails, they said it wouldn’t be ready until 1:00. Okay, okay, that’s not a problem. We would still eat, and I’d order other stuff and get the oxtails to go. No problem, right?

So I decided to get the fried ribs lunch special, with three ribs, a side, a sauce, and a drink. I love ribs in all their forms, but I’ve never had fried ribs before, and neither had my friend. I gave him one, because this is how we roll. The spareribs were a generous size, and they were definitely meaty. They had a pleasantly crispy exterior, and they were still tender and juicy, luckily not dry at all. I would have been really disappointed if they were dried-out and both crunchy and greasy at the same time, like how way too many sports bars ruin their wings in the fryer, but these were really good. The meat didn’t exactly fall off the bone (which is a good thing, texture-wise), but it was tender enough to easily munch off the bone without leaving shreds behind. By the time I finished my two ribs, it looked like a piranha had gotten to them.

These ribs came unsauced, unlike most restaurant ribs, but Candee Lee’s offers a few different house-made sauces in little ramekins, and I tried three of them. There was an Angry sauce, which is a house-made hot sauce, there was another sauce that was sweet and spicy with a honey base, and then there was an Oooh Baby sauce that was their barbecue sauce. The ribs were tender enough to tear off little chunks with my fingers and dip them in the various sauces to try them all, which was nice. They were a good blank canvas, and all three of the sauces slapped.

For my side, I ordered the double meat baked beans, which were dripping out of the styrofoam box, but every drop was worth saving and savoring. According to the website, these baked beans are slow-cooked in molasses and spices with ground beef and smoked sausage. According to me, your friendly neighborhood Saboscrivner, these are the best barbecue-style baked beans I’ve had anywhere in the Orlando area. I absolutely loved them. 10/10, chef’s kiss, no notes. (Spoiler alert: that will become a trend with the other sides.)

In an attempt to both kill time so we could get the oxtails and go, and also to try as many things as possible on the menu, I also ordered the chicken sandwich, which is half-price on Wednesday. It included a large chicken thigh, breaded and fried to perfection, on a soft bun. It was an awe-inspiring piece of fried chicken. My only disappointment was realizing later that the sandwich did not include any coleslaw or house-made pickles, as promised. I thought it seemed a little minimalist, but the chicken itself was so good, and I enjoyed dunking it in the three aforementioned sauces after giving my friend a piece, so I got distracted. It didn’t occur to me until after we left that we missed out on the coleslaw and pickles, and therefore got an incomplete chicken sandwich experience at Candee Lee’s.

This time, my side was the “million dollar” mac and cheese, which was so rich and buttery and cheesy that I had to pace myself to get through the modest scoop. I don’t mind telling you, constant readers, that this might be the best macaroni and cheese I’ve ever had in the Orlando area. It’s different from my previous favorite from Pom Pom’s Teahouse and Sandwicheria (which no longer lists mac and cheese on its menu after reopening in Sanford), but it is everything you dream of good mac and cheese being. Truly the stuff that cheesy, buttery, carby, gooey dreams are made of.

By the time we got our food, chatted a lot, finished everything, and watched the restaurant get pretty damn busy during its first hour of operation, it was almost 1:00, so I asked if the oxtails were almost ready to get an order to go. I paid, got a refill of the delicious lemonade (from a company called Tractor that I had never heard of before), and resumed talking with my friend. By this point, they were even more slammed. I asked for an oxtail update again at about 1:45, not out of patience yet, but starting to get close. They eventually brought out the oxtails and two sides, and we finally hit the road for home closer to 2:00. I know oxtails take a long time to cook, but if I had known they wouldn’t be ready when the restaurant opened at noon, I definitely would have timed our visit to arrive later.

These were HUGE oxtails, not like the small pieces in a dark brown gravy I’m used to from Jamaican restaurants, or even the ones I’ve had in the past from Nikki’s Place. These slow-roasted oxtails had an orangey-red mirepoix gravy on them (comprised of onions, carrots, and celery, for those who were wondering), and the tails themselves were much longer segments of bone than I am used to, with rich, unctuous, fatty, tender meat clinging to them. They were delicious, just different.Once I got home and started writing this review, I saw photos on Candee Lee’s Facebook page that the oxtails were supposed to be topped with a generous portion of fried onions. I love fried onions, so much so that I obsessive-compulsively sample onion rings anywhere I can find them and make a special point to review said onion rings on this very blog. I even have a catch-phrase: RING THE ALARM! I was so sad and disappointed that once again, a key component had been left out of something I ordered, with no notice or warning.

But I cheered up a bit once I tried the same collard greens with smoked turkey that my friend got with his catfish. Just like with the baked beans and the million dollar mac and cheese, these smoky, savory greens were the best collard greens I’ve ever had in my life. Better than Nikki’s Place, better than 4 Rivers Smokehouse from 15 years ago, when you could always count on them to have great barbecue and sides, better than anywhere. These are the greens you’re looking for!

And my second side, which I also enjoyed back at home was the macaroni salad, a side item I am now in the habit of ordering anywhere and everywhere I see it on the menu. Just like my obsessions with onion rings, chili, and Italian subs, I can’t turn down macaroni salad or pasta salad, because everyone’s versions are different, and they’re almost all good to great. Well, stalwart Saboscrivnerinos, this macaroni salad was GREAT. Once again, even though you’ve already heard this familiar refrain, this might be the best macaroni salad in the greater Orlando area. There was a bit of yellow mustard in it, along with the mayo, shreds of carrot, and bits of celery and onion, and the elbow macaroni was perfectly al dente. Perfect in every way.

I think Chef Tony Tone should consider offering a side sampler on his menu, where diners can choose anywhere from three to five sides for a fixed price (factoring in small upcharges for the mac and cheese and greens). Maybe someone doesn’t feel like heavy meats but really wants to sample as many sides as possible without paying $5.50 for a la carte portions or just getting one or two sides with a larger meal. I think that would be a big hit. Even though the fried chicken and fried catfish were both excellent, the fried ribs hit different in the best possible way, and the oxtail was on point, I thought all the sides were the stars of our huge and heavy lunch.

With all this said and done, I give a rousing recommendation to Chef Tony Tone and Candee Lee’s Soul House. All the food was a hit, even though I am not thrilled about missing out on the fried onions on top of my oxtails and the cole slaw and pickles on the chicken sandwich. Because the restaurant is an hour away in a direction I never travel in, sadly, I don’t think I will make it back down there, so I’ll never get to try the “complete” versions. But if you’re ever in the area or just craving soul food, I still encourage others to check it out. Just be on the lookout when you receive your food, and don’t hesitate to ask if anything seems to be missing. And if you come for oxtails on a Wednesday, call first to confirm when they will be ready, so you don’t kill two hours waiting around there like my very patient pal and I did.

Finka Table & Tap (Miami)

Finka Table & Tap (https://www.finkarestaurant.com/) is a Cuban-Peruvian-Korean fusion gastropub in Miami. If that sounds too good to be true, trust me — it’s real, and it’s spectacular. My best foodie friend took me there on my a recent trip to visit him and my family down in Miami. It is one of his favorite restaurants in the city, and he knew I would dig it too.

Finka is probably considered to be off the beaten path in Miami, far from the tony and trendy areas like Wynwood, Brickell, South Beach, and Coral Gables, but tucked away in the West Kendall suburbs. But just like another kick-ass Miami restaurant my friend brought me to, the award-winning, Cuban-inspired barbecue paradise Smoke & Dough, which is only five minutes away, Finka is worth a trip to Kendall to discover and experience for yourself.

It has been a while since our visit, so I didn’t remember what impressive-looking cocktail my friend ordered, but he identified it as a mai tai, one of his favorite drinks. He said it was a particularly good one, too, since Finka uses orgeat syrup.

It was your typical sweltering Miami summer day, and I have become a true lemonade connoisseur. Finka’s lemonade hit the spot.

Finka serve croquetas de jamon from the iconic Islas Canarias Cuban restaurant in West Kendall, and they are the absolute best croquetas anywhere in Miami. If you don’t believe me, my best foodie friend reviews Cuban cuisine and especially croquetas all over the city in his Croqueta Diaries, and he agrees. I admire his focus, and he is an excellent food writer. He’s brought me to the Islas Canarias ventanita before, to try croquetas straight from the source, but it felt like a bonus to be able to order them at Finka. They are never burnt or greasy — just fried to golden-brown perfection, smoky, creamy, and rich. A squirt from the lime wedge brought a nice acidic tang to cut the savory richness.

We set to work sharing those as well as the malanga nachos, crispy malanga (taro root) chips smothered with ribeye picadillo, a three-cheese sauce, maduros (we both love sweet fried plantains), pink pickled onions, leche de tigre sour cream, Fresno peppers, and scallions. It was a fusion feast.
By the way, leche de tigre is the spicy marinating liquid left over from marinating ceviche, so don’t worry — no real tigers were milked for this sour cream. Can you imagine?

I don’t think this is on the menu anymore, but my friend ordered the gochujang noodles, a dish with spicy sweet potato noodles, shrimp, snow peas, bok choy, squash, carrots, and mushrooms. I didn’t try it (I avoid mushrooms), but he seemed to like it.

I got “dak-galbi”-style chicken fried rice, with queso frito (fried cheese!), pineapples, red peppers, seasonal veggies, maduros, sesame seeds, spicy gochujang sauce (which I have become a huge fan of), and pickled cabbage. It was hard to choose, with so many interesting dishes on the menu, but this seemed to exemplify Finka’s commitment to fusion cuisine, while a few other things seemed a little more “normal.”

I know tourists, hipsters, and bon vivants probably avoid Kendall for their grand nights out in Miami, but there are more top-notch, destination-worthy restaurants there than when I left that area for good and moved to Orlando, at the end of 2004. My best foodie friend and I grew up in Kendall. We survived Kendall. Whether you’re a Miami local or just passing through for a good time, if not a long time, you could do a hell of a lot worse than venturing into West Kendall for a memorable fusion feast at Finka. Maybe plan accordingly and hit Finka and the outstanding Smoke & Dough on the same trip — possibly dinner at one place and takeout for lunch the next day from the other!

Yamasan Sushi and Grill

Yamasan Sushi and Grill (https://www.yamasanorlando1.com/) is a beautiful little Japanese restaurant that has been around for a decade or so, in the Mills Park complex on Mills Avenue, just north of Virginia Drive. I have driven by it literally hundreds of times, but never stopped in to eat until this past Monday, a rare weekday off. My wife and I were already nearby and craving sushi, so we decided to try it, not knowing anything about the place. (Longtime readers know I usually research restaurants and study menus in advance, but not always!) Anyway, I’m so glad we did, since we had a wonderful experience.

Yamasan’s menu is absolutely huge, and they have all kinds of Japanese food, not just sushi. They have hot and cold appetizers, bento boxes, noodle and rice dishes, poke bowls, hibachi grill options, and even a Japanese/French fusion menu. The thing is, I’m a roll guy. I love ornate sushi rolls, especially with raw fish and lots of ingredients to keep things interesting. Most of the “Yamasan special rolls” are in the $15-$25 range, and some are even more expensive than that, so I figured it would be an expensive meal, but probably worth it.

However, our lovely server Maggie let us know that Yamasan recently began offering an all-you-can-eat menu, where for the price of $47.95 per person, you had a pretty large variety of selections to choose from — not the entire multi-page menu, but still a lot. There is a 9o-minute time limit, and everyone in the party must choose the all-you-can-eat option. Even my wife was on board, because if you were even thinking about ordering three rolls, you come out ahead, and we each ordered more than that! If you show up hungry, it would be foolish not to.

I took the liberty of photographing both sides of the all-you-can-eat menu, since it isn’t available on Yamasan’s website as of now:

I am going to include the regular menu prices with each description below, just to show you how much money we saved by doing all-you-can-eat instead of ordering a la carte.

I started out with the tuna carpaccio appetizer ($21.95 on the regular menu), which was very small, but it’s all good, because we had a lot more food coming. This was two pieces of lightly seared tuna topped with creme fraiche, black caviar, grated pecorino Romano cheese, fleur de sel (very posh sea salt), truffle oil, and capers, with wild field greens drizzled with raspberry dressing on the side. Needless to say, there’s a lot going on in this little app! It was so magnificent, I implored my wife to try the second piece, and she liked it so much she ordered another portion for herself (also $21.95).

She got one piece of escolar sashimi ($12 for three pieces on the regular menu), and I got three pieces of mackerel sashimi ($12 for three pieces on the regular menu). I love mackerel, because it is always lightly pickled, and I grew up eating pickled herring (one of the foods of my people).

This was the Japanese mentaiko udon ($18.95 on the regular menu), a decadent noodle dish from the Japanese/French Fusion part of the menu. These super-thick, super-chewy udon noodles were topped with salty salmon roe that pop in your mouth, finely shredded nori (roasted seaweed), more grated pecorino Romano cheese for an umami punch, and what I’m guessing was salty, punchy cod roe mayonnaise on the right side of the photo below. That’s what they put on the mentaiko fries I tried many years ago at Susuru, anyway. This was another dish that was as gorgeous as it was tasty.

I loved everything about this, and I was even considering ordering it before we discovered the all-you-can-eat menu (and that this was included in it). Again, my wife impressed me by trying it and pleasantly surprised both of us by liking it. But what’s not to like… unless you already don’t like salty, fishy flavors?

The rolls started to show up next. This was a Dynamite roll ($11.95 on the regular menu), with tuna, yellowtail, wasabi, and scallions, a nice opening act for the superstars about to arrive. It was dynamite!

And here’s a gorgeous tray with three of my selections: the Salmon Tower roll in the front, the Capitan roll in the middle, and the Unforgettable roll in the back. Lord have mercy!The Salmon Tower roll ($19.95 on the regular menu) is pressed into that rectangular shape, and it includes green shiso (perilla) leaves mixed with sushi rice, smoked salmon, salmon roe, kani (krab), mayonnaise, and eel sauce. I wasn’t sure what shiso/perilla leaves were supposed to taste like, but my research tells me the flavor is a cross between basil and mint — both good flavors to go with the salty, smoky richness in this roll.

The very traditional Capitan roll ($18.95 on the regular menu) includes fried calamari, avocado, Cajun seasoning, topped with smoked salmon, wasabi, creme fraiche, mango salsa, and eel sauce. Okay, so it isn’t traditional at all, but I love fusion cuisine, and I already said I’m a sucker for sushi with a lot going on!

I really should have turned the tray around for a better pic of the Unforgettable roll ($18.95 on the regular menu) in the back, but I forgot. Yes, I forgot the Unforgettable roll. I’m here all week, folks. Anyway, it includes spicy tuna and barbecue eel, and it is topped with avocado, seafood sauce, eel sauce, crispy fried noodles, and masago (red flying fish roe). Each of these was mighty fine.

Here were my wife’s first two roll choices, which curiously came out some time after my first three. In front, you can see the Mango Tango roll ($17.95 on the regular menu), with tempura shrimp and cream cheese, topped with mango, shredded coconut, and eel sauce. It’s always a crowd-pleaser.Behind it is the Sweet Sixteen roll ($17.95 on the regular menu), with shrimp, krab, cream cheese, and a rice paper wrapper, topped with mango and strawberries and drizzled with a “mayo sauce.” I like some sweet flavors with my sushi, like eel sauce, and I’m never sad to see mango show up, but that one was a little too desserty for me.

This was her next roll, the Lover roll ($18.95 on the regular menu), with krab salad, topped with tuna, spicy mayo, a tiny Hokkaido scallop, and red caviar (masago) on top. There was something else in this Lover roll that wasn’t listed that was brown and had kind of a funky flavor that didn’t fit. At first, I feared the chef sneaked mushrooms into this roll, because it definitely wasn’t a fish. The menu listed tempura flakes, but we didn’t see any or feel their familiar, pleasing crunch. It turned out that it was inari, also known as bean curd, or fermented and fried tofu, a common sushi ingredient which she likes, but I don’t — especially when I’m not expecting it. But once she got too full, I poked the inari out of each piece with a chopstick and dutifully finished the rest of the Lover roll.

And this was my last stand: the Dream of Dream roll ($20.95 on the regular menu), which you have to say in the old-timey newsman voice of the late, great David Lynch, as you can bet that I did. It was a fitting way to end our unexpected feast at Yamasan, with tuna, salmon, shrimp, krab, tempura flakes, regular AND spicy mayo, eel sauce, and black caviar. Back in 2009, David Lynch quoted The Upanishads on Twitter, in those days before it became one of the worst places on the Internet: “We are like the dreamer who dreams & then lives in the dream.” Later, in his brilliant third season of Twin Peaks in 2017, Lynch’s character Gordon Cole had a dream in which Monica Bellucci repeated the line. And that’s all I could think of while I ate the Dream of Dream roll.

So if you add up the prices of everything we got, had we ordered a la carte:

Two tuna carpaccio appetizers ($21.95 x 2) +
Escolar sashimi ($12 for three pieces, since we would not have been able to order just one piece) +
Mackerel sashimi ($12 for three pieces) +
Japanese mentaiko udon ($18.95) +
Dynamite roll ($11.95) +
Salmon Tower roll ($19.95) +
Capitan roll ($18.95) +
Unforgettable roll ($18.95) +
Mango Tango roll ($17.95) +
Sweet Sixteen roll ($17.95) +
Lover roll ($18.95) +
Dream of Dream roll ($20.95) =
A whopping $232.45 (plus tax and tip)!

We would never run amok like that if we were ordering off the regular menu… or would we? I always say we know how to party, and why doesn’t anyone ever party with us?

But instead, we paid $47.95 x 2 = $95.90 (plus tax and tip, of course). YOU’RE WELCOME. And thank you to Yamasan Sushi and Grill!

Well, stalwart Saboscrivnerinos, I am thrilled to report that our first visit to Yamasan surpassed my wildest dreams (or dreams of dreams). I would happily go back, because even if it isn’t a cheap dinner, you will eat like a king and go home satisfied and ready to crash for the night. I feel like we got our money’s worth, and then some. And it’s such a nice little restaurant (with comfortable booths!), I would recommend it even if you don’t go with the all-you-can-eat option, even though I personally think it’s a no-brainer. Ask for Maggie — she was the only server on duty, so she was slammed, but she will take the best care of you, as she did for us.