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Who is The Saboscrivner?

I love food.  Love eating, love cooking, love discovering, talking about, recommending, and reviewing food.  Food is everything: culture, history, art, science, politics.  In these uncertain times, I think sharing a good meal is something everyone can find common ground over, even if they’re diametrically opposed foes on every other topic.  So here’s one more food blog that can possibly even contribute to the shared human experience in this tumultuous world.

I live in the Orlando, Florida area.  Orlando has been unfairly dismissed for far too long as being “chain restaurant hell,” a destination for theme park tourists and not much else.  But I’ve lived here since 2004, and I love our rich, diverse, multicultural city, which has a TREMENDOUS culinary scene.  We have amazing restaurants far from the gates of the parks (and a few that are closer), so the main point of this blog will reviewing my local food experiences.  I am lucky enough to travel for work once in a while, and occasionally I even visit friends out of town, so rest assured that when I do, you bet I’ll review whatever I eat in more exotic locales.

I might also share recipes I create or find, or even review groceries that everyone needs to know about.  (I am obsessed with mustard and tinned seafood.)  And occasionally I’ll just want to recommend or review something else: a good movie, TV show, band, comedian, book, or comic book.  I’m a librarian by trade and a lifelong nerd, so I tend to get enthusiastic about the stuff I like, and I want to share information and tell stories.

I’m a mediocre photographer with an even more mediocre phone camera, so I’ll try to share my culinary adventures with you as best I can, primarily using my words.  Hopefully you’ll read and follow this blog and feel inspired to try something new for yourself.  There’s so much good food out there, and you need to eat anyway, so why not treat yourself to something awesome?  Sometimes a good meal, or even a snack, can be the highlight of the day — either something to help you celebrate or cheer you up.  You might not always agree with me, but I look forward to hopefully building a following and a community, with all the constructive feedback that goes along with those.

Just a few warnings:
1. I don’t drink and I’m allergic to mushrooms, so don’t expect booze-and-shrooms content.
2. I don’t like hashtags.  This will be one food blog where you can always expect complete thoughts in complete sentences.
3. Nobody is paying me to do this, so everything I write is my own opinion, which I stand by with a clear conscience.
4. I have never used generative AI to write this blog (or anything else), and I never will.

So what’s the deal with the title?  What the heck is a saboscrivner?  Well, I’m also a lifelong comic book reader (“This guy?  The hell, you say!”), and one of my favorite comics of the last decade was Chew, written by John Layman, drawn by Rob Guillory, and published by Image Comics.  The whole series is complete, and you can buy the volumes from your local comic book store or on Amazon, or check them out from your public library or on the Hoopla service.  It’s an action-adventure-crime-horror-sci-fi-comedy, set in a food-obsessed world where most of the main characters have food-related super powers.  Everyone’s powers receive a polysyllabic name and a description, and one of my favorites, a restaurant critic who is a main character in the Chew saga, served as a bit of a personal inspiration.

John Layman introduced the character in Chew #3:  “Amelia Mintz is a saboscrivner.  That means she can write about food so accurately, so vividly and with such precision – people get the actual sensation of taste when reading about the meals she writes about.”

That saboscrivner ended up playing a key role in saving the world, but I’m just a regular guy trying to impart information as a food blogger, hoping to share the same sensory experience with my readers.  I hope you’ll decide to follow The Saboscrivner and turn to it for restaurant reviews and recommendations in Orlando and beyond.

Junior Colombian Burger

It has been a while since I’ve been to Junior Colombian Burger (https://juniorcolombianburger.com/), which has four locations in Orlando, none of which are exactly close to me.  But the one I visited was in East Orlando, between UCF’s sprawling campus and the Waterford Lakes sprawling shopping center, at 11875 East Colonial Drive, Orlando, FL 32826.  Junior’s is a casual restaurant where you order at the counter, and they have a lot to choose from: multiple burgers, hot dogs, arepas (savory Colombian corn pastries stuffed with cheese, beef, or chicken), empanadas, fries covered with various toppings, and plantains covered with various toppings.  This is not exactly health food, especially when you realize there are eight different sauces to dip your food in.  I fully admit the allure of multiple sauce combinations and permutations is what pulled me in to finally try Junior’s.

From left to right: pink sauce (kind of like a ketchup/mayo concoction), pineapple sauce (sweet and sticky; thinner than preserves), garlic sauce (mayo-based for creaminess), Zulu hot sauce, and Bella hot sauce.  

And in additional squeeze bottles, pale orange creamy chipotle sauce, tangy barbecue sauce, and a mysterious unlabeled green sauce.  

Here they are!  Do I remember which is which?  Abso-fucking-lutely not!  Like I said, it has been a while.  But were they good?  Yes, every one is worth trying, as long as you’re there.

RING THE ALARM!  These onion rings were breaded rather than battered, which is not my preferred style.  They were on the greasy side and remained boiling lava hot while I tried to eat them, complete with that mouth-shredding texture.  But they functioned mostly as delivery devices for the eight condiments. 

Because this was my first visit, I chose the eponymous Junior’s burger, with a single beef patty, American cheese, lettuce, tomato, cooked onion, potato chips, pineapple sauce, pink sauce, and garlic sauce on a soft brioche bun.  Yes, there’s a lot going on there, but that is far from their most complicated or decadent burgers.  As you can see, the patty is on the small side, cooked like a smashburger (although it didn’t get much in the way of crispiness from the Maillard reaction), and gets a bit lost in the mix with all the other flavors and textures.   
I didn’t hate it by any means, but there are certainly better burgers to be found in Orlando.  I think a thicker, juicier burger patty would help immensely, but I always prefer those to thin smashburgers.

Next time I’ll branch out from burgers and try something a little more unique.  I love that they have a ridiculous-looking sandwich served on flat fried plantains instead of bread called the amor toxico (toxic love), topped with cheese sauce, queso fresco, mozzarella cheese, ketchup, mustard, garlic sauce, tomato, lettuce, corn, and a choice of beef, chicken, or both.  I know Junior’s Colombian Burger has a strong and loyal fan following, so please tell me, stalwart Saboscrivnerinos: what are your favorite menu items, and what should I get next time?

Uncle Tony’s Backyard BBQ

I love barbecue, and now that I’m making a genuine effort to eat fewer carbs, I have made two visits to a relatively new barbecue restaurant, knowing I could focus on delicious meat and hopefully make wise choices with the sides.  Uncle Tony’s Backyard BBQ (https://uncletonysbackyardbbq.com/) is located in Orlando’s Pinecastle neighborhood, at 6807 South Orange Avenue, south of Lancaster Avenue (which you can take west to Orange Blosson Trail get to Saboscrivner favorites Bombay Street Kitchen and Tortas El Rey).  Back in 2018, when I had just started this blog, I reviewed a short-lived sandwich shop called Dancing Pigs Deli in the same location Uncle Tony’s has been operating in for the past four years.  Because it is all the way across town from me, I only recently made it down there, but I’m so glad I did.  By the way, it is open Tuesday – Saturday, 11 AM to 3 PM.  There are tables for dining in, but no booths.

I brought home takeout both times.  On my first visit, my wife requested St. Louis style ribs, so I got her an order that came with four generously sized, tender ribs.  By the way, St. Louis style is more of a cut than a specific barbecue style or flavor.  All the meals come with two sides, but the only thing she was in the mood for was collard greens.  I got her the greens, plus baked beans for myself. 

Meals also come with a choice of bread, and she wanted cornbread.  It’s a dollar upcharge, but it is so good, that’s a bargain at twice the price.  

I got a two-meat combo for myself, with spare ribs (so we could try both kinds of ribs) and brisket, plus collard greens and potato salad.  Between those two and the baked beans, I knew I would be in side heaven, and you can gauge barbecue joints by the quality of their sides as well as their meats.  I liked both kinds of ribs, but she liked my spare ribs even better than her St. Louis ribs.  After I had one of these, we traded the rest of our ribs.  Happy wife, happy life!

Here’s a better view of that brisket on a separate plate.  It looks a little dry, but it tasted great, I assure you.  I prefer fattier brisket, so I made a mental note to request it that way next time.

The potato salad was Southern style, with some crunch and tanginess from diced pickles, as well as some yellow mustard in there.  This might be a hot take, but aside from chips, potato salad is probably my favorite way to eat potatoes.  Better than baked, mashed, even fries?  I said what I said! 

Forgive me — I don’t remember exactly which sauce was which, but the reds were hot and extra hot, and the oranges were “tangy” and mustard.  I liked them all, but naturally, I preferred the hot ones.  But whenever I visit a new barbecue restaurant, I want to try all of the sauces.  

I returned to Uncle Tony’s in late April when my wife was craving ribs, greens, and cornbread again.  I brought her home a two-meat combo with the spare ribs, a smoked chicken leg and thigh, collard greens, and yellow rice and peas.  The ribs were good this second time, but we both underestimated how perfect the smoked chicken would be.  I always prefer thighs and legs (at least when it comes to chicken), and they were so tender and juicy.  The skin pulled off easily, and she doesn’t like to eat chicken skin, so that was my little treat.  It was sooooo good.  This might have been the best smoked chicken we’ve ever had anywhere. The rice and peas were somewhat nondescript, aside from being salty, but the greens remain the best around.

I got that great cornbread for both of our sides so she could have them, since I’m still trying to be better about carbs.

I got myself a two-meat combo with the the St. Louis-style ribs again, plus smoked sausage.  My favorite part about barbecue sausage is the almost crispy natural casing, and this did not disappoint.  I admit I prefer SmokeMade Meats + Eats for sausage as well as brisket, but we are both superfans of the ribs here at Uncle Tony’s.   The sauteed cabbage in the top left was extremely salty, but I love cabbage in all its forms, so I’m glad I tried it.  But those greens have never failed us and never could.

This time, I splurged on the beef rib as well, a huge and expensive piece of meat we have both enjoyed at multiple barbecue spots, including SmokeMade, Briskets in Oviedo, and the much-missed Git-N-Messy BBQ (RIP, Chef Chuck Cobb).  Beef ribs are a perfect example of a “sometimes food,” for multiple reasons (fattiness plus cost), but it was a worthwhile indulgence, since they only ever offer them on Fridays and Saturdays.  Luckily, they are big enough that we can easily get a few portions out of each one.  I could easily slide the bone right out of the rich, marbled meat.

Here’s a top view, so you can see that peppery crust on it. 

Well folks, I gotta tell you, my wife liked the smoked chicken and collard greens so much that she asked me to return the following Saturday to bring home more.  And I never say no to Dr. Professor Ma’am if it’s within my power to do what she wants.  The smoked chicken was just as good this time, after setting a very high bar.

Finally, here’s a good close-up of those tender, savory, smoky collards that are packed with smoked meat:

It took me three visits to finally try Uncle Tony’s macaroni and cheese, and it is wonderful.  Definitely one of the best mac and cheeses in the Orlando area.  Not baked to dryness, and not swimming in a gloopy, gloppy cheese “sauce.”  Just perfect.

I had to bring home another beef rib as a treat.  Here’s a surprisingly good photo I took after removing the bone, which was as long as my forearm.  (As Jason Statham said in the movie Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels, “It’s as long as my arm; I wish it was as long as something else!”)

And here’s that top view again.  The rib was even better this second time around, and more photogenic to boot.

Despite the distance, we intend to keep coming to Uncle Tony’s, most likely to continue bringing home takeout.  Our other favorite barbecue place in Orlando, the aforementioned, Michelin-recommended SmokeMade Meats + Eats, isn’t exactly close either, but we love both, and it is nice to have a couple of fantastic options to choose from.  I think their beef ribs are about equal, but I give Uncle Tony’s the edge for smoked chicken and all the different sides, especially the greens, potato salad, and mac and cheese.  Also, now that I’ve spoken to Tony himself and his wife LaShunda, they are the nicest people, and they deserve all of our support.  If you have already been to Uncle Tony’s Backyard Barbecue, what are your favorite dishes on the menu, and what do I need to try next time?

Chayhana

Chayhana (https://chayhanaorlando.com/) is an Uzbek restaurant that serves authentic Uzbek and Central Asian food, all of which is halal.  It is located at 851 State Road 436, #1027, Altamonte Springs, FL 32714, in the long plaza at the intersection of State Roads 436 (Semoran Boulevard) and 434.  I’ve had Uzbek food before, at Caravan Uzbek & Turkish Cuisine, but that’s all the way across town from me, in an area I never go.  I was excited to finally try Chayhana, which is a lot closer.  I’ve brought takeout home twice now, and it was great both times.

My wife is the biggest hummus aficionado I know.  She loves hummus to the point where I wonder if I should be jealous of hummus.  (With all honesty, I am very secure in our marriage, and I am always glad when she enjoys anything.)  Not long after we both discovered the greatness of The Hummus Guy food truck in Maitland earlier this year, we realized Chayhana’s hummus was very different, but also terrific.  They sprinkle theirs with some light seasoning, drizzle on olive oil, and top it with a few chick peas.  And if I may, what’s the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chick pea?  The president has never paid to watch a Russian garbanzo bean.  Hey-o!

The hummus came with these warm, lightly grilled pita wedges for spreading or dipping.  I consider myself a bit of a pita connoisseur, since there are good and bad kinds, and this is the good kind that gyros are often served on.  You can buy the Kontos brand of this kind of pita at some places, like the halal Indian market Apna Bazaar, with locations on South Orange Blossom Trail and on 434 in Longwood.

My wife also loves kasha, or buckwheat (o-tay!), a nutty and earthy grain that is toasted and then boiled until tender, kind of like couscous.  I ordered her this grechka, which is warm buckwheat, sprinkled with parsley. 

I ordered this pumpkin manty with her in mind.  Manty are filled dumplings with a soft, thin, chewy, handmade dough wrapper, kind of like Chinese wontons, Italian ravioli, or Polish pierogi.  These manty were much larger than any wontons, ravioli, or pierogi I’ve ever seen, though.  And yes, they were stuffed with seasoned pumpkin, onions, and spices for a delicious dish vegetarians would love.  Actually, anyone would love these.  I thought they might be a bit bland, but they were anything but.  And look at the pattern on the outside.  They didn’t have to make them look that beautiful, but someone went to the trouble of doing that to all the manty!   

This dish is Chayhana’s best-seller, and you can see why.  It is plov, a dish of fragrant, buttery fried rice cooked with halal-certified beef and lamb, carrots, onions, scallions, a hard-boiled quail egg, and pomegranate arils.  It is gorgeous, isn’t it?  It looks like Christmas, with the parsley, scallions, and shiny red pomegranate arils sparkling on top.  It’s delicious, too.  I preferred it to the similar rice dish at Caravan called to’y osh.I mentioned this in my recent review of Gateway to India, but plov shares its etymology with a more familiar rice dish, pilaf (always so good and buttery from Turkish restaurants like Bosphorous and Istanbul Grill), and they both evolved from Persian pilau, along with Indian biryani, another beloved rice dish.  I love that so much.

But that’s not all!  I had to try the boso laghman, a dish of hand-pulled wheat noodles, halal beef, thin strips of an egg omelet, sauteed onions and bell peppers, and sprinkled with parsley and sesame seeds, all sauteed together in a savory sauce.  Those are the omelet strips on top, not the noodles.

Here are the noodles, and they were so nice and chewy and al dente.  The sauce gave everything the slightest smoky flavor.  I also ordered laghman at Caravan, and while it was very good, I once again give the edge to Chayhana.  I’ve mentioned in a few different reviews that the term laghman was derived from the Chinese lamian (like the wonderful, chewy noodles I reviewed earlier this year at SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles), and that’s how we also got the Chinese lo mein and the Japanese ramen.  

Here is my plate.  What a bounty!  And now you can get a good look at how gorgeous the dough sculpting on that manty was.

After reading the menu, my wife asked me to bring her pistachio cake, which I was happy to do.  But when I got there, they had two different pistachio desserts, and I wasn’t sure which one she wanted, so I brought both home.  That’s the kind of husband I am.

This dome-shaped dessert was the pistachio cupala, which Chayhana imports from a Michelin-starred bakery in Turkey.  I didn’t have any (I’m avoiding sweets, and this didn’t look like my thing anyway), but she seemed to like it.

She preferred this Antep dream cake (topped with finely crushed pistachios above that rich, creamy layer of chocolate).  It was not listed on the website, but it was available when I went in.  I think it looks more appetizing, personally:

Everything was such a treat, I returned a few weeks later for another round of takeout.

The hummus wasn’t sprinkled with that seasoning or adorned with extra chick peas the second time, but she still liked it a lot:

The plov was still wonderful:

SinceI feel like I ran amok with carbs on our first takeout trip, I resolved to eat a little healthier the second time around.  This was the chicken shish, served in small chunks rather than one long skewer so it could fit in a small takeout box.  I could tell the chicken was marinated in herbs and spices and grilled, but I most admit, the picture on the website made it look better with the nice caramelization from grilling.  I don’t think it lived up to the “golden and smoky” description from the menu.  It was chicken breast meat, which is certainly healthier (and it’s what I cook and eat at home all the time now), but I think thigh meat is always more flavorful and feels like more of a treat. 

I preferred the lulya kebab, made of seasoned halal ground lamb and beef that was skewered and grilled.  This is the kind of thing I will always order at any Middle Eastern or Central Asian restaurant, kind of along the same lines as the lamb adana kebap I ordered at Istanbul Grill or the Iraqi kebab we tried at Rawsha Mediterranean Cuisine.  Both kebabs were served with red onions (some raw, some grilled) over very thin flatbread.

We have yet to dine in at Chayhana, but there is a nice little dining room that looks comfortable.  When I picked up my takeout orders, it was during the holy month of Ramadan, and smiling Muslim families were just starting to show up for dinners.  Everyone looked so happy to be there, and hopefully I’ve communicated why.  Chayhana is the very definition of a hidden gem, serving food that may be somewhat familiar, but with unique twists.  It makes you think about geography, about how little we (as Americans) know about Uzbekistan and other Central Asian countries, but how their cuisine has so many similarities with Turkish and other Middle Eastern fare, and how they all evolved from shared origins.  That makes our increasingly complicated world seem a little bit smaller, and hopefully gives us all a little hope that we’re not so different, you and I.  And for those of us who live in the Orlando area, we are so lucky to have a diverse culinary scene that allows more than one Uzbek restaurant to survive and thrive, even in super-suburban Altamonte Springs.

Phoresh Noodle & Street Fare

It has been a while since I made this trip to Phoresh Noodle & Street Fare (https://orlandophoresh.com/) with a former co-worker from my previous job, and since then, both of us have moved on to bigger and better things.  It is one of the few Vietnamese restaurants on the east side of Orlando, located at 2751 S Chickasaw Trail #107, Orlando, FL 32829, just south of Curry Ford Road.

Phoresh is a casual restaurant with counter service:

I ordered a Vietnamese iced coffee, which I like the way I like my women: sweet and strong.  But since I so rarely drink coffee, it made my heart race for the rest of the afternoon (women often have that effect on me as well).  Next time, I know I would be better off with just water.

When you order the “pho it up,” you have a choice of beef, chicken, or vegetarian broths, with different proteins available for each.  I ordered the beef broth, and I paid a $4 upcharge for the “combo” with all four possible proteins: paper-thin slices of raw eye round steak (they cook in the hot broth, but I like my steak rare no matter what), beef brisket, beef flank, and dense, chewy meatballs (nothing like Italian-style meatballs).

Here it is after a bit of stirring, to make the rice vermicelli noodles visible:

It was a super-solid bowl of pho, and I can’t say anything bad about it, but I have yet to find anything to dethrone my favorite, Pho Huong Lan.

My colleague ordered pho with just brisket.  We shared the plate of herbs, but I don’t like bean sprouts, so he got to have them all.  I love putting basil, lemongrass, and fresh jalapenos into my pho.   

He got an order of pork belly bao, and we each had one.  It was AWESOME.  Looking at the current menu, Phoresh lists grilled pork as the only pork-related option for the bao, and I’m guessing that would be different than the pork belly we ordered, admittedly a while back. 

I, in turn, got the tempura shrimp bao, and we each had one of those too.  I loved them as well.  The cool, crispy, slightly sweet pickled vegetables on the top, which would not be out of place on a banh mi sandwich, really made the bao sing.

Finally, I got an order of two roti paratha cakes for us to share, but my colleague wasn’t into them, so I had most of them with the spicy curry sauce they came with.  I’m guessing these were pre-made and frozen, then heated up on the grill, not unlike the roti I used to buy at Asian markets to keep in the freezer at home.  But I’m guessing even Hawkers Asian Street Fare doesn’t make their roti from scratch (or could this be me picking a fight with Hawkers?  I’m guessing they won’t notice or care.)  Anyway, these things are are always good, so no complaints.   Like I always say, imagine the love child of a fresh, fluffy flour tortilla and a flaky croissant, and you’ve got roti and/or paratha.

So that was our visit to Phoresh Noodle & Street Fare.  If you live in Orlando, you probably have strong feelings about the best places for pho, and some might offer more pho options, larger menus, and/or table service.  But like I said, there aren’t many Vietnamese restaurants in East Orlando, so if you live out that way, you should definitely give Phoresh a try.

Aloha Hawaiian Kitchen

I love Hawaiian food, and I had been excited to try Aloha Hawaiian Kitchen (https://alohahawaiiankitchen.com/) for a while.  Aloha is down near Orlando International Airport, so I don’t see it becoming part of my regular restaurant rotation, but when I finally made it there in December, it did not disappoint.  Hawaiian cuisine evolved from a combination of Native Hawaiian, Japanese, Chinese, Filipino, Korean, Portuguese, and mainland American ingredients and influences due to the diaspora, but it is very much its own thing.  It is one of my favorite regional American cuisines, up there with Ashkenazi Jewish delis and appetizing stores and the grand tradition of barbecue.  But while I’ve tried amazing delis in New York City, Los Angeles, and South Florida and barbecue in Texas, Memphis, and right here in Orlando, I have yet to visit Hawaii, so I take our local Hawaiian restaurants at their word.

Because I always love sampling multiple things, especially when I know I won’t be able to return to a restaurant often, I ordered the Surfside Sampler, which comes with three meats: marinated and grilled beef short ribs (kalbi), crispy marinated and fried ono shrimp, and marinated and pulled luau pig.  However, I asked if I could substitute the mochiko chicken instead of the luau pork, since it is the same price when they are sold separately.  They were kind enough to allow me to get that substitution.  This heaping tray came with scoops of white rice and Hawaiian macaroni salad, which I am a huge fan of.  It was probably more than enough calories for the full day, with more to spare.  I think the Hawaiians perfected mayonnaise-based macaroni salad, which I have recreated at home.  The secret, which I found in a few different recipes, is to let slightly underdone macaroni noodles absorb a lot of milk, and then stir in your mayo.  (They recommend Best Foods, which I think is the same stuff sold as Hellman’s in the eastern U.S., but I’m a Duke’s man.)

I first tried mochiko chicken at the first Hawaiian restaurant I ever visited, a place called Hawaiian Grindz that used to be on State Road 434 in Oviedo.  It didn’t last very long, perhaps in part because the laid-back owners didn’t always open on time… or at all, despite posted hours.  But I loved the little pieces of fried chicken thighs, which were lightly breaded and then tossed in a sweet sauce.  While these mochiko chicken pieces at Aloha look a bit dark, I can assure you they were fried to crispy perfection.  They weren’t overly sweet, either.  It was a nice blend of sweet and savory — much less sweet than the mochiko chicken at the old place that closed. 

Here’s a close-up of the kalbi, those wonderful marinated and grilled Korean-style beef short ribs, cut against the bone  These also had a savory-sweet marinade,  and the grilling process added some great flavor from caramelizing sugar on the surface.  The meat was tender, but not exactly falling apart or off the bone.  Kalbi (sometimes called galbi on Korean menus) always has a pleasant chew, and you can usually tear or bite the meat near the bone and pull it right out.  That area is even chewier, but the texture is nice. 

Here is an extreme close-up of one of the crispy, garlicky-fried shrimp.  It had such a nice flavor and crunch, and just like at my beloved Poke Hana, it is fried so well that you can eat it crunchy tail and all.  Look at all that garlic! 

While I wanted to try more, I limited myself to a Spam musubi, which I enjoyed later, back at home.  These are the ultimate in simple comfort food: a slice of fried Spam (which is actually delicious, snobs and skeptics!) on a bed of sushi rice, rolled tightly in a sheet of nori (seaweed, the same stuff in sushi rolls), and often served warm.  I’ve seen these musubi referred to as “Hawaiian protein bars,” and they do have just enough protein and carbs to give you a burst of energy when you need it.

By the way, Spam is a product of Minnesota, but it became closely associated with Hawaiian cuisine when the U.S. military used it to feed troops stationed in Hawaii in the 1940s.  That’s how it found its way into saimin (a Hawaiian take on ramen), Spam fried rice, and of course, the musubi.

We are lucky to have a few wonderful Hawaiian restaurants to choose from in Orlando, including the aforementioned Poke Hana, OverRice, the new Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner, and Hanalei Shave Ice for a cool, refreshing dessert.  Aloha Hawaiian Kitchen is in great company.  Sadly, Aloha is much further away from me, but even though I don’t foresee going back as often, it was very good, and I’m so glad I tried it.  If you find yourself down near the airport, or coming or going from the 528 or the Lake Nona area and you don’t feel like awesome seafood at High Tide Harry’s or Orlando’s best Cuban sandwich at Vicky Bakery, check it out.  Aloha features a large menu, including meat-centric combo meals like I ordered and customizable poke bowls, if you want something lighter than the smorgasbord of meats I enjoyed.  Nowadays, as I continue slowly losing weight from eating less and eating healthier, I would have gotten two or even three meals out of that Surfside Sampler, but I  housed it in one sitting at the time, thinking that dangerous thought of “Well, it won’t be as good heated back up later!”  I’ve come a long way over these past four months.

Holbox (Los Angeles)

Holbox (https://www.holboxla.com/) is the first actual Michelin-starred restaurant I’ve ever dined at, although I have visited several Michelin Bib Gourmand award winners and Recommended restaurants here in Orlando.  It specializes in Mexican seafood dishes, and in all my research on Los Angeles restaurants, it is one of the most popular and highly recommended destinations for Angelenos and tourists alike.  However, even though the food is crafted and plated with elegance and style, tasting as beautiful as it looked, it is a humble stall inside Mercado La Paloma, a Mexican food hall in South Los Angeles, surrounded by five more casual food stalls — at the time of this writing, four other Mexican restaurants and one Thai place.

Because you can either eat at the counter or communal tables, I would say Holbox is casual and accessible too, which makes it kind of a novelty for a Michelin-starred restaurant, and extremely unique.  They offer an eight-course tasting menu that surely sells out weeks in advance, but I shared a magnificent feast with a good friend on a work trip to L.A. back in November, just sitting at the counter and ordering off the regular menu.  I’m so glad we got to experience Holbox for ourselves, after reading so much hype and love online.

(By the way, Holbox is pronounced “OL-bosh,” like the “ol’ swimmin’ hole.”  Maybe that wasn’t the best example.)

This was my sparkling lemonade, and we shared these fresh tortilla chips and salsa.  Since my friend and I take eating seriously, we almost skipped the chips until I realized they are only $1.  How could we say no to $1 chips?  That would be worth it anywhere, and especially at the legendary Holbox.  They were good chips — so light and thin and crispy! — and the salsa was magnificent.

All four of these fresh hot sauces were stellar: Chile Kut with roasted habanero, Habanero, Arbol-Guajillo, and Chile Morita.  The roasted habanero had an almost creamy consistency, and the Arbol-Guajillo and Chile Morita were deliciously smoky.  I wish they sold them in jars like these, but I would not have been able to bring them home with me on the plane anyway.

This beautiful, intricate creation was my tuna tartare tostada, with Baja bluefin tartare, Sinaloa-style salsa negra, pickled carrots and onions, dollops of pureed avocado, and fresh cilantro on a thin and crispy fried corn tortilla (like an open-faced taco). 

And my friend got this smoked kanpachi tostada, kanpachi being a type of fish.  His tostada also included Hokkaido scallops, shrimp, the aforementioned arbol-guajillo hot sauce, dollops of avocado, and cilantro. 

Since I am obsessed with smoked fish, I got this house-smoked kanpachi taco for myself, with queso chihuahua, salsa cruda, avocado, and peanut chili oil on a fresh blue corn tortilla.  Every bite was fabulous.

You can see the smoked fish interior better in this shot:

In the photo below, the taco on the top is the Baja fish taco, with crispy battered local Vermillion rockfish, crema, mayonnaise, salsa roja, and pico de gallo.  I got a perfect bite of the fried rockfish, and it might have been my first time trying that fish (a second new fish on a trip to L.A., after discovering sand dabs at H.M.S. Bounty!).On the bottom is the pan-seared Hokkaido diver scallop taco, with three scallops, chile x’catic sauce, caramelized onions, tomato, and marinated fennel on the same blue corn tortilla.  I got a scallop, and it was as perfect as a scallop can be.

Finally, we shared the filete al carbon, a mesquite-grilled filet of branzino served over cilantro rice with black beans, more of that x’catic sauce, avocado, and pico de gallo, with rolled-up tortillas in that foil off to the left side.I think we settled on this dish because they were out of something that interested us both more, but it did not disappoint, despite seeming a little more ordinary than the other creations.

Every time I hang out with this friend of mine, we always fit in an epic meal.  We enjoyed Langer’s Delicatessen, Pann’s, and Genghis Cohen on three of my previous L.A. trips, as well as a few other L.A. restaurants (including a famous, iconic Hollywood classic) and an awe-inspiring indigenous restaurant in Portland, Oregon, that I have yet to review.  He’s a stand-up guy, a great professor, and a fellow adventurous diner, so I am always happy to catch up with him when I’m on the other coast.  Holbox was one of our greatest discoveries to date, and if you don’t want to take my word for it, that tire company loved it enough to give it a coveted Star.

Gateway to India

Gateway to India (https://gatewaytoindiarestaurant.biz/) is a great, underrated Indian restaurant located at 790 E State Rd 434, Longwood, FL 32750.  It is located a short walk away from the Spice House of Longwood Indian grocery store (820 E State Rd 434 #150), and very close to one of my favorite businesses in the Orlando area, Acme Superstore (905 E State Rd 434).  I try to check in at Acme at least once a month, and I really should make it to Gateway to India more often than I do.  But whenever I do, it never disappoints.

On my most recent visit for takeout (which was still too long ago), I tried their lamb biryani for the first time.  Even though I like everything spicy, I ordered this basmati rice dish mild because I planned to share it with my wife.  My fascinating research showed me that biryani may have reached the Indian subcontinent as an offshoot of Persian pilau, which other cultures refer to as the more familiar rice pilaf, and that also gave us the Central Asian plov, which I enjoyed at Caravan Uzbek & Turkish Cuisine and Chayhana (review coming soon, I swear!).  The tender shreds of lamb blended with cashews, cilantro, and raisins, and there was a hard-boiled egg in there too. 

There are two Indian dishes my wife returns to time and time again.  One is butter chicken (sometimes called makhani), served in a creamy, tomatoey sauce.  The velvety-smooth, rich consistency usually means there is butter in there, but I should clarify and refer to it as ghee.  See what I did there?

The other go-to Indian dish my wife loves is palak paneer, which is spinach  (the palak) served in a creamy, mildly spiced curry sauce with chunks of a soft cheese (the paneer).  You can’t go wrong with it, and even if you’re not a vegetarian, it is always a delicious, crowd-pleasing choice.

Even though I didn’t get photos of the butter chicken and palak paneer containers, this is the plate I fixed for my wife, with the palak paneer over basmati rice at 12:00, the butter chicken taking up the largest compartment, and some of that luscious lamb biryani at 9:00. 
The plastic plate with compartments is from some ancient takeout order (maybe from the defunct Stonewood restaurant), not from Gateway to India.  But I kept two of these because they were so nice, microwave-safe AND dishwasher-safe, and they have clear lids that snap on.  But most of all, she doesn’t like different kinds of food touching.

This was my lamb vindaloo ($19.95), served spicy hot.  It has chunks of lamb and potato in a spicy curry flavored with vinegar, garlic, and chiles.  Vindaloo has Portuguese origins, which those colonizers bought to Goa, a small, coastal state in western India.   I go back and forth between different lamb dishes, but vindaloo is one of my favorites, along with rogan josh.  I love vinegar as a flavor, so the vindaloo won out this time. 

And here it is in the big compartment with butter chicken and palak paneer for me:

I’ve written before about my great love of Indian breads at Sanaa (which I recommend to my fellow Indian bread aficionados), but I am always a fan of naan, roti, paratha, kulcha, and more.  I would like to create something where people sign up to get a different Indian bread every week, and we could called it Kulcha Klub.  Maybe they could be served by a quartet of women in blonde wigs, the Four Naan Blondes.

I got an order of butter naan, because that’s kind of the fluffy, puffy standard:

As well as a butter paratha, to compare and contrast — not just the two breads from Gateway to India, but also to see how their paratha stands up to other versions I’ve had, like the crispy Malaysian style that I used to buy frozen.  Paratha from Indian restaurants are never as flaky like those frozen versions (I call them the love child of a flour tortilla and a croissant), but they are still awesome, especially when you have rich, spicy curries to scoop up.   

This was our container of raita, a cooling yogurt with cucumbers that was so good to cool down my tongue after the fiery vindaloo. 

And even though this looks similar, this was a rice pudding dessert that my wife wanted to try.  I don’t remember what it tasted like, but it’s possible I didn’t try any.

I really love Indian food, even though I don’t pretend to be any kind of expert.  I don’t think I’ve ever been disappointed by a dish, meat or vegetarian alike, but I like to balance trying new things with going back to my old favorites.  That means trying them at different restaurants too, to compare how each place makes those familiar favorites.  Gateway to India is one of the closer Indian restaurants to our home, so I need to make it back there more often.  If you’re in Seminole County, especially Longwood, Casselberry, and Winter Springs, it is so close to where all three areas converge at the intersection of 434 and 17-92.  Even if you’re further out, it is definitely worth the drive.  I might see you over there some time soon, probably after a bit of back issue bin diving at Acme.  That always makes me work up an appetite!

Barkhaven

“D’ya like dags?”
“Dags?!?”
“Yeah, dags.”
“Dags!”
“Ohhhh, dogs.  Yeah, I like dags.”
(Name that movie!)

Barkhaven (https://barkhaven.com/) is a combination dog park, dog grooming facility, restaurant, and bar in Orlando’s Ivanhoe Village area at 724 Brookhaven Drive, Orlando, FL 32803.  To put everyone’s minds at ease, don’t worry — there are no dogs in the dining room shedding, drooling, making noise, or trying to steal people’s food.  There is a separate entrance for people to bring their dogs outside to the fenced-in dog park, but there are windows to watch dogs romp and frolic while you eat inside the restaurant, or there are outside tables separated from the dog park with a fence.

Full disclosure: we don’t have a dog.  I am super-allergic to them, and I am much more of a cat person (more like I’m totally obsessed with cats and want to be best friends with every cat ever).  But my wife grew up with Yorkies and one wonderful Yorkie/schnauzer mix and misses them terribly.  When I recently found out Barkhaven existed, I thought she would appreciate a chance to watch some dogs make with the romping and the frolicking while enjoying lunch out after a nearby hair appointment.

The restaurant and bar area is a large, wide-open space with tables and a few half-booths up against one wall.  All the food is served in disposable paper bowls and plates, with plastic utensils, which is fine with me.  It’s a very casual place.  The menu says they don’t use any seed oils, and they do all their frying in beef tallow, so look out, vegetarians.  I don’t know when seed oils became public enemy #1 or beef tallow started being considered a healthier option, but I remain skeptical.  I’m seeing this sentiment so often, I expect it’s some political agenda.  Unlike the wonderful smokiness that comes from frying in reserved bacon grease, I don’t think beef tallow adds any particular flavor to foods, just kind of an oppressive heaviness.  Would I end up changing my mind after this lunch at Barkhaven?  Read on, stalwart Saboscrivnerinos.

My wife is obsessed with hummus, especially since our recent discovery of The Hummus Guy food truck.  Aside from the dogs and the proximity to her stylist, the other reason I suggested Barkhaven was because I saw they serve hummus, and I knew she would want to try it.  It’s a very nontraditional hummus, though — mixed with balsamic red peppers (I loved ’em, she didn’t), topped with crushed crispy chickpeas (not sure if they were dehydrated or fried in beef tallow?) and paprika, and served with thick-sliced cucumbers and pita chips (definitely fried in beef tallow, maybe a moment too long).

She usually likes wings, and I’ve been thinking a lot about delicious Korean-style crispy chicken wings recently.  As a result, we were both intrigued by the honey mustard crunch wings, glazed with fermented honey mustard,  sprinkled with green onions, and drizzled with scratch-made ranch dressing.  These were meaty wings, not those tiny, sad sports bar wings I hate, but they were a little dry.  The wings were suitably crispy without being breaded (there’s that beef tallow again), and as a mustard aficionado, I liked the honey mustard flavor that wasn’t too sweet like so many honey mustards that I call “dessert mustards.”  My wife doesn’t like ranch and didn’t care for the ranch being drizzled on, so I ended up eating most of the wings in three separate servings, mostly back at home. 

This was definitely the best thing I tried at Barkhaven, the arayas, also known as a Lebanese burger.  Rather than a traditional burger patty that might just be sprinkled with salt and possibly pepper, this beef was heavily seasoned with delicious spices, and it actually had some heat, which I enjoyed.  It was stuffed into a pita and grilled to get a crispy exterior, then drizzled with garlic tahini and rosemary pineapple hot honey.  It was terrific — savory, spicy, and so messy and greasy.  It reminded me of a spicier, greasier, messier version of the hawawshi I enjoyed so much last summer at The Cairo Express, although that was crispier because it didn’t have any condiments or sauces on the exterior surface. 
The crunchy red cabbage slaw on the side was pleasant, even though I usually prefer the creaminess of conventional cole slaw.   And I didn’t realize this arayas was going to come with fries, but I’m trying to be good and avoid fries.  These were pretty conventional crinkle-cut fries, despite the beef tallow, so I wasn’t terribly tempted.  I dipped a few in the ranch that came with the wings and dragged a couple through whatever tahini, honey, and meat juice dripped out of the arayas, but I left most of the fries behind and only felt a little guilty about the unexpected food waste.

Even though I’ve been eating less and eating healthier (this meal being an exception), and even though I didn’t devour all the fries, I saw Barkhaven offered onion rings, so I had to try them.  I try onion rings anywhere and everywhere, since I have a recurring feature on this food blog called Ring the Alarm!  These were described as “Thick-cut onions dipped in a crisp, golden beer batter and fried to perfection,” but they were not the kind that I am always delighted to find in the wild, at restaurants like The Whiskey, Christo’s, Build My Burgers, bb.q Chicken, and even Culver’s.  The batter on these was dry, kind of tasteless, and had several burnt, scorched spots.  Maybe it was the beef tallow.  

Barkhaven also serves wood oven pizzas, fish and chips, salads, a hot dog (natch), desserts that include deep-fried pound cake (I guess they have to put that beef tallow to use!), and a whole menu for dogs.  When I saw the combination of “beef, pumpkin, and broccoli” on the menu, along with “frozen carrots,” I thought “those are certainly some choices,” until my wife pointed out that those are options for dogs.  But again, the dogs would eat outside.  They also have a large selection of beers, wines, cocktails, coffee, tea, and other non-alcoholic beverages, all for humans.

Once we boxed up our ample leftovers, we adjourned outside to watch the aforementioned romping and frolicking for a little while.  Those good boys and girls were having a grand time, and we saw some beautiful huskies and even a rascally shiba inu.  It was a nice way to decompress mentally and physically after what turned out to be a heavy meal.  So that was Barkhaven.  If you like dogs, drinking, and beef tallow, you’ll be in absolute heaven!

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles

Back in 2019, when I took my wife to New York City for our tenth anniversary, one of the many delicious restaurant meals I had was takeout from Xi’an Famous Foods, a casual restaurant specializing in hand-ripped biang biang noodles and spicy braised meats from the city of Xi’an in northwestern China.  It was like no other style of Chinese food I’ve ever had before, and I’ve been saying for years that even with Orlando’s breadth and depth of various regional Chinese cuisines, we have desperately needed a place like that.  Well, we finally have one!

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles (https://www.instagram.com/slap.noodles.usa) opened back in November 2025, at 6532 Carrier Dr Ste B, Orlando, FL 32819, right off International Drive, a little north of Sand Lake Road.  It has been a popular destination ever since, with influencers aplenty sharing videos of chefs slapping and stretching dough to make perfectly long, chewy noodles from scratch and diners slurping them up.  I’ve been wanting to try it ever since it opened, and I finally made it over there yesterday with my best friend, after surviving yet another MegaCon.  (We went to The Whiskey two years ago and Fogo de Chao, which I somehow still haven’t reviewed, last year.)

I’ve been so good lately about not drinking my calories, but I figured our food would be spicy, so I treated myself to a sweet drink from SLAP!’s beverage cooler, this interesting-looking honey pomelo drink.  After I chose it, I found a small English language label on the back that described it as honey grapefruit tea.  It was so sweet and refreshing and delicious, and I loved it, especially as a nice treat after a grueling day. 

It was way too hot for bowls of soup, so my friend and I both chose chili SLAP! noodle bowls, sans soup.  He got the signature three-way chili SLAP! noodles, which we learned was a combination of three of their other bowls that can be ordered separately: sliced pork, tomato and egg, and vegetable (which included cubed potatoes, celery, and carrots at the bottom.  They also included bok choy, bean sprouts, and lots of chili oil and chili powder.  It looks fiery, but believe it or not, it was a lot milder than it looks.   There were a bunch of those perfectly al dente biang biang noodles under there, don’t worry!

I got the beef short rib chili SLAP! noodles (no soup for me either), because short ribs are up there with oxtails and lamb shanks as rich, flavorful, unctuous cuts of meat I have a hard time turning down.  It has the same kind of seasoning and also included bok choy (which I like) and bean sprouts (which I don’t care for, so I’ll know to ask them to hold the bean sprouts on future visits).  I loved that they included a pair of kitchen shears for cutting the short rib, which I wish more restaurants would give you.  A few well-placed snips separated all the tender meat from the giant bone, and a few more cuts turned it into bite-sized pieces.  I got two meals out of this giant portion, which I’m getting so much better at.   

I forgot to get a good picture of the actual hand-ripped biang biang noodles at the restaurant, but here they are in my leftovers, back at home.  At the restaurant, we only ate with chopsticks.  These noodles are awe-inspiring, and the chili seasoning is addictive.  I suspect these dishes would still be too spicy for my wife, parents, brother, and in-laws, who hate anything beyond “mild,” but I think most people will find the taste pleasant and the spicy level nowhere close to overwhelming.   
By the way, watch how you dress at SLAP!, because it is too easy to splatter a good shirt with that chili oil.  I’ve been wearing the same beloved shirt to comic book conventions for 25 years to pose for pictures with comic writers and artists, a running gag that only I appreciate.  Luckily, I had the foresight to pack an expendable T-shirt to change into when we got to the restaurant to protect The Shirt.

I was also excited to try one of the “crispy pancake” sandwiches at SLAP!, and I went with cumin lamb.  Lamb is probably my favorite protein of all time (not including cured Italian meats), and I still remember the spicy cumin lamb “burger” I got at Xi’an Famous Foods in 2019.  In that earlier review, I described it as being served on “a crispy flatbread bun that was like a cross between a pita and an English muffin, in terms of texture.”  Here at SLAP!, the flavorful lamb was served on roujiamao, which is more like a flaky paratha or roti, a flatbread I’ve described many times as being the love child of a croissant and a flour tortilla.  This roujiamao was much flakier, with more crispy layers, than the typical roti you may have had at Hawkers Asian Street Fare (which you can also buy frozen, as I suspect Hawkers does).  This didn’t have that rich, buttery flavor either, but it complimented the cumin lamb very well, and it was fun to eat it. 

My friend and I each took a few bites, and we still had some left over that I finished for lunch today.  This was a hit, and you can also order the crispy pancakes with braised beef or braised pork.  Next time!  And yes, there will be a next time. 

Finally, we also tried some skewers, because we know how to party, and how often will be able to make it back here?  It’s across town from me, and my dude lives in Miami!  Homestead, actually!  All the skewers at SLAP! are served in orders of four for a very reasonable $5.99 each, but you can’t mix and match.  That’s how we ended up with a dozen skewers.  The four on the left are Chinese sausage, which was both of our favorites.  They were grilled and coated with the same chili spice blend, but they weren’t like the chewy and slightly sweet lap cheong I expected, which I love in fried rice.

The four skewers in the middle are beef, which were also grilled and coated with the same chili spicy powder.  They were chewy and not terribly tender, and not juicy at all, but at least they tasted good.  The four crispy chicken skewers on the right were disappointing, though.  My friend was spot-on when he called them “basic.”  I’ve had spicy chicken nuggets from Wendy’s with more flavor, so at least I know to skip them on future visits.  The sauce on the right side that looks like it’s about to spill (we didn’t let that happen) was reminiscent of Thai sweet chili sauce, but not nearly as sticky or sweet.  That sauce and the chili spice on the left helped make the crispy chicken skewers somewhat more interesting, but I’d still order something else next time.  Maybe an order of dumplings, which you can get with lamb, beef and onion, pork and cabbage, or pork, shrimp, and chive.

Vegetarians, there aren’t a ton of options for you at this meat-centric restaurant, but you can safely get the vegetable chili SLAP! noodles, vegetable noodle soup, and a couple of different skewers: enoki mushrooms with tofu skin, cilantro with tofu skin, or “fish tofu,” which I’m assuming is tofu reminiscent of fish, and and not a combination of fish and tofu.  If you are ovo-vegetarians, you could also do the tomato and egg chili SLAP! noodles or tomato and egg noodle soup.

And since I always check (on behalf of my wife), there are a few half-booths along the side wall at SLAP!, in addition to plenty of tables.  Napkin dispensers hang from the ceiling above each table, which you’ll appreciate due to needing a lot of napkins for meals like this, and also for the space they save on the tabletops.  (Short people, your mileage may vary).

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles is definitely worth all the hype.  I would have liked to get there sooner, but better late than never.  Now I look forward to returning, but I wanted to publish this review as soon as possible, for the handful of you out there who haven’t already jumped on the bandwagon.  It’s another treasure for Orlando, especially when the options along International Drive are so chain-centric.  As if there was any doubt, SLAP! slaps.

JAWS Toppoki

JAWS Toppoki (https://www.jawsfl.com/) is a Korean street food restaurant in the hustling, bustling food court inside the world’s largest H Mart, the Korean supermarket that took Orlando by storm when it opened in the Pine Hills neighborhood in West Orlando in September 2025.

My wife and I waited three weeks before visiting the sprawling supermarket, not wanting to deal with long lines and crazy crowds.  But even though we chose to visit on a weekday midmorning, the lines were still long and the crowds were still crazy.  H Mart was a shining example of abundance, but the cramped layout and oblivious shoppers (half of whom were filming themselves, like everyone has to be an influencer) detracted from what should have been a fun experience.  Pushing my disabled wife in a wheelchair was an exhausting and nerve-wracking experience for both of us.  It could be said that shopping was not a pleasure.

After we were both fed up and hangry, we adjourned to the huge food court, which was just as chaotic as inside the store itself.  My wife wanted to eat some sashimi we bought inside H Mart, so I rolled her up to an empty table and went off to decide what to get myself for lunch.

Feeling overstimulated and overwhelmed, I decided on JAWS Toppoki, maybe because it was nearest to our table, or maybe because it had the shortest line.  I liked that you could order different combinations of things, which I always appreciate at any restaurant, especially when a lot of the food is unfamiliar.  I am getting more of a Korean food education, especially because I stay in Koreatown on my occasional short work trips to Los Angeles.  But I looked forward to trying JAWS Toppoki’s take on various popular street foods.

I have had a never-ending tuna craving, so I ordered tuna gimbap to start with.  Gimbap looks superficially similar to a sushi roll: various ingredients rolled and wrapped in sesame oil-seasoned rice and a layer of dried seaweed — very similar to Japanese nori — and then sliced.  The tuna gimbap included a mayo-based tuna salad, finely shredded carrots, cucumbers, sesame leaf, and sesame seeds.  It was a fine little snack, but I couldn’t complain about getting too much tuna.  If anything, it was too much carrot and not enough tuna!  This gimbap didn’t quite scratch the tuna salad itch I’ve had since having the best tuna sandwich ever on my last trip to Los Angeles, which also included some Korean flavors. 

Since our H-Mart visit was annoying and I didn’t expect to return anytime soon, I figured I would order a few different things for the sake of variety, end up with plenty of leftovers, and probably not bother to come back.  So I got one of the combo meals called the “Friends Set.”  It included a large metal bowl of JAWS toppoki, the restaurant’s namesake dish.  Korean restaurants usually list this dish as tteokbokki, but it is pronounced similarly to “toppoki,” hence the name.   
The long noodle-looking things are chewy rice cakes, and I assure you they are nothing like the bland, crunchy, hockey pucks our moms ate in the ’80s when they wanted to lose weight, even though those food crimes are what first comes to mind when I think of “rice cakes.”  These are chewier than gnocchi or any al dente pasta, and denser as well.  They are swimming in a very spicy sauce with thin slices of tofu, and the whole bowl is topped with crispy strips of something or other, sesame seeds, scallions, a quail egg, and half of a fried dumpling called mandu.

The “Friends Set” also came with a paper bag of tempura-fried sweet potato, shrimp, squid, cheese, and another dumpling.  I forgot to take a picture of it, but you can see what the “Deep Fried Set” looks like on the menu.

Finally, it came with sundae, but not the kind you’d get at Carvel on your birthday!  Sundae is a chewy, savory Korean blood sausage, and this was my favorite part of the meal.  Call it morcilla, black pudding, or just plain old blood sausage, I am always a fan of this savory treat, even if it may seem weird or intimidating to the uninitiated.  Maybe I have a bit of of Goth in me, but I think it is always delicious, no matter which culture or cuisine makes it.  Korean sundae (which I believe is pronounced “SOON-day”) is made with pork blood, glass noodles, and glutinous rice, and it had a moist, almost sticky texture, especially with the chewy natural casing.  Sprinkling on the included mixture of salt spiked with dried chili flakes made it even more flavorful.   The thinly sliced, light-colored meat in the top right of the sundae tray is intestine, but I’m not sure if it was beef or pork.  I ate it, and it was fine, but I’ve enjoyed grilled intestines at Argentinian and Korean restaurants before that ended up with a more pleasant crispy texture from the grilling process.

I don’t think I’ll return to JAWS Toppoki anytime soon, but that’s mostly because I have no desire to return to H Mart anytime soon.  It is probably worth visiting once if you’re the least bit curious, but even though it’s a really nice Asian supermarket, Orlando is very lucky to have many other nice Asian supermarkets, and none of them are as crowded and chaotic.  Lotte Plaza Market has a (much smaller) food court, but was probably the largest and “nicest” before H Mart opened.  My usual go-to, iFresh Market, is the current home of the wonderful Meng’s Kitchen.  And then we also have Enson Market, New Golden Sparkling Market, Phuoc Loc Tho (my first-ever Asian market from when I first moved to Orlando in 2004), the “OG” Dong A Market, Eastside Market, and even more.

And even if you’re craving Korean street food, we have plenty of other local restaurants where you won’t have to navigate that intense, insane food court.