Chicken – The Saboscrivner

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles

Back in 2019, when I took my wife to New York City for our tenth anniversary, one of the many delicious restaurant meals I had was takeout from Xi’an Famous Foods, a casual restaurant specializing in hand-ripped biang biang noodles and spicy braised meats from the city of Xi’an in northwestern China. It was like no other style of Chinese food I’ve ever had before, and I’ve been saying for years that even with Orlando’s breadth and depth of various regional Chinese cuisines, we have desperately needed a place like that. Well, we finally have one!

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles (https://www.instagram.com/slap.noodles.usa) opened back in November 2025, at 6532 Carrier Dr Ste B, Orlando, FL 32819, right off International Drive, a little north of Sand Lake Road. It has been a popular destination ever since, with influencers aplenty sharing videos of chefs slapping and stretching dough to make perfectly long, chewy noodles from scratch and diners slurping them up. I’ve been wanting to try it ever since it opened, and I finally made it over there yesterday with my best friend, after surviving yet another MegaCon. (We went to The Whiskey two years ago and Fogo de Chao, which I somehow still haven’t reviewed, last year.)

I’ve been so good lately about not drinking my calories, but I figured our food would be spicy, so I treated myself to a sweet drink from SLAP!’s beverage cooler, this interesting-looking honey pomelo drink. After I chose it, I found a small English language label on the back that described it as honey grapefruit tea. It was so sweet and refreshing and delicious, and I loved it, especially as a nice treat after a grueling day.

It was way too hot for bowls of soup, so my friend and I both chose chili SLAP! noodle bowls, sans soup. He got the signature three-way chili SLAP! noodles, which we learned was a combination of three of their other bowls that can be ordered separately: sliced pork, tomato and egg, and vegetable (which included cubed potatoes, celery, and carrots at the bottom. They also included bok choy, bean sprouts, and lots of chili oil and chili powder. It looks fiery, but believe it or not, it was a lot milder than it looks. There were a bunch of those perfectly al dente biang biang noodles under there, don’t worry!

I got the beef short rib chili SLAP! noodles (no soup for me either), because short ribs are up there with oxtails and lamb shanks as rich, flavorful, unctuous cuts of meat I have a hard time turning down. It has the same kind of seasoning and also included bok choy (which I like) and bean sprouts (which I don’t care for, so I’ll know to ask them to hold the bean sprouts on future visits). I loved that they included a pair of kitchen shears for cutting the short rib, which I wish more restaurants would give you. A few well-placed snips separated all the tender meat from the giant bone, and a few more cuts turned it into bite-sized pieces. I got two meals out of this giant portion, which I’m getting so much better at.

I forgot to get a good picture of the actual hand-ripped biang biang noodles at the restaurant, but here they are in my leftovers, back at home. At the restaurant, we only ate with chopsticks. These noodles are awe-inspiring, and the chili seasoning is addictive. I suspect these dishes would still be too spicy for my wife, parents, brother, and in-laws, who hate anything beyond “mild,” but I think most people will find the taste pleasant and the spicy level nowhere close to overwhelming.
By the way, watch how you dress at SLAP!, because it is too easy to splatter a good shirt with that chili oil. I’ve been wearing the same beloved shirt to comic book conventions for 25 years to pose for pictures with comic writers and artists, a running gag that only I appreciate. Luckily, I had the foresight to pack an expendable T-shirt to change into when we got to the restaurant to protect The Shirt.

I was also excited to try one of the “crispy pancake” sandwiches at SLAP!, and I went with cumin lamb. Lamb is probably my favorite protein of all time (not including cured Italian meats), and I still remember the spicy cumin lamb “burger” I got at Xi’an Famous Foods in 2019. In that earlier review, I described it as being served on “a crispy flatbread bun that was like a cross between a pita and an English muffin, in terms of texture.” Here at SLAP!, the flavorful lamb was served on roujiamao, which is more like a flaky paratha or roti, a flatbread I’ve described many times as being the love child of a croissant and a flour tortilla. This roujiamao was much flakier, with more crispy layers, than the typical roti you may have had at Hawkers Asian Street Fare (which you can also buy frozen, as I suspect Hawkers does). This didn’t have that rich, buttery flavor either, but it complimented the cumin lamb very well, and it was fun to eat it.

My friend and I each took a few bites, and we still had some left over that I finished for lunch today. This was a hit, and you can also order the crispy pancakes with braised beef or braised pork. Next time! And yes, there will be a next time.

Finally, we also tried some skewers, because we know how to party, and how often will be able to make it back here? It’s across town from me, and my dude lives in Miami! Homestead, actually! All the skewers at SLAP! are served in orders of four for a very reasonable $5.99 each, but you can’t mix and match. That’s how we ended up with a dozen skewers. The four on the left are Chinese sausage, which was both of our favorites. They were grilled and coated with the same chili spice blend, but they weren’t like the chewy and slightly sweet lap cheong I expected, which I love in fried rice.

The four skewers in the middle are beef, which were also grilled and coated with the same chili spicy powder. They were chewy and not terribly tender, and not juicy at all, but at least they tasted good. The four crispy chicken skewers on the right were disappointing, though. My friend was spot-on when he called them “basic.” I’ve had spicy chicken nuggets from Wendy’s with more flavor, so at least I know to skip them on future visits. The sauce on the right side that looks like it’s about to spill (we didn’t let that happen) was reminiscent of Thai sweet chili sauce, but not nearly as sticky or sweet. That sauce and the chili spice on the left helped make the crispy chicken skewers somewhat more interesting, but I’d still order something else next time. Maybe an order of dumplings, which you can get with lamb, beef and onion, pork and cabbage, or pork, shrimp, and chive.

Vegetarians, there aren’t a ton of options for you at this meat-centric restaurant, but you can safely get the vegetable chili SLAP! noodles, vegetable noodle soup, and a couple of different skewers: enoki mushrooms with tofu skin, cilantro with tofu skin, or “fish tofu,” which I’m assuming is tofu reminiscent of fish, and and not a combination of fish and tofu. If you are ovo-vegetarians, you could also do the tomato and egg chili SLAP! noodles or tomato and egg noodle soup.

And since I always check (on behalf of my wife), there are a few half-booths along the side wall at SLAP!, in addition to plenty of tables. Napkin dispensers hang from the ceiling above each table, which you’ll appreciate due to needing a lot of napkins for meals like this, and also for the space they save on the tabletops. (Short people, your mileage may vary).

SLAP! Hand Ripped Noodles is definitely worth all the hype. I would have liked to get there sooner, but better late than never. Now I look forward to returning, but I wanted to publish this review as soon as possible, for the handful of you out there who haven’t already jumped on the bandwagon. It’s another treasure for Orlando, especially when the options along International Drive are so chain-centric. As if there was any doubt, SLAP! slaps.

The Hummus Guy

The Hummus Guy (https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61572949094121) is a Middle Eastern food truck that sets up at 711 North Orlando Avenue (also known as 17-92), Maitland, Florida 32751, outside of a bank building. The truck’s usual hours are noon to 7 PM, every day except Monday and Saturday, but always check their Facebook page for updates, just in case. A friend of mine has been singing its praises for a while, but I finally tried it in January, and I’ve been back many times since that first discovery — almost weekly!
The Hummus Guy isn’t just a generic description, but the owner-operator’s name is Guy and he makes he best hummus ever… as well as the best of so many other things. Buckle yourselves in for this one, constant readers! You’re about to discover one of my new favorite places to eat in the entire Orlando area.

I had taken large, clear photos of the menu to share, but Guy recently posted a new, updated menu online, so I’m using his own posted images instead. These are all the pita sandwich and plate (bowl) options:

Here are all the “extras” — a la carte orders that aren’t sandwiches or bowls.

The first time I visited the truck was a pretty cold January evening. While I waited for my food, Guy was kind enough to give me a free sample of four freshly rolled, freshly fried falafel balls with a pool of the smoothest, creamiest tahini (sesame paste) ever. These were so delicious, with the perfect crispy crunch, soft and yielding centers, and not greasy at all. Best falafel ever? Certainly the best falafel I’ve ever had anywhere, and my falafel-loving wife would soon agree.

This is the crown jewel, the chicken shawarma pita sandwich. I’ve been on a shawarma kick lately, discovering a great grilled beef shawarma at The Cairo Express Egyptian food truck in Winter Park last summer, as well as a few lesser shawarmas. But this is the absolute best chicken shawarma I’ve ever had in my life. Best chicken shawarma in the world? I can’t answer that, but I would certainly support it in a shawarma-off. So delicious, so flavorful, so tender. It’s addictive. We have since ordered it so many times, and it is never dry. So many shawarmas are disappointingly dry!The pita sandwich is garnished with chopped salad, creamy hummus, and tahini. By the way, Guy’s pita bread is all baked from scratch, and it is smaller diameter than most store-bought pitas, but a lot thicker and fluffier. It makes for a wonderful sandwich, and those sandwiches are stuffed so full of ingredients spilling out the top, they are best enjoyed on the premises. (Don’t worry, there are a few tiny portable tables with chairs.)

This is one of the many chicken shawarma plates I’ve brought home over the past two months. This one is served on a bed of addictive, savory mujjadara, buttery rice sauteed with lentils and a healthy amount of caramelized onions. As a caramelized onion lover, I love this mujjadara, and I appreciate that Guy goes HARD on the onions. Even my wife, who usually hates onions in anything, likes this stuff.

On a later visit, I brought home an order of the best chicken shawarma ever, which came with a simple side of tahini. This was a HUGE portion, and while I probably could have devoured it in one sitting, my wife and I spaced it out and made it last a few days, since I am consciously trying to eat less, eat healthier, and lose weight (believe it or not).

Here is a falafel plate I brought home for my wife on one of my many recent visits, on another bed of that insanely good mujjadara. That’s hummus on the side, topped with some of Guy’s spicy sechug sauce, made with fresh herbs (I’m guessing cilantro and parsley) and jalapenos. I’ve bought the Trader Joe’s version before (they spell it “zhoug” and describe it as a spicy condiment from Yemen), but Guy’s version is lighter, thinner, and less oily than Trader Joe’s and reminds me of a spicy tomatillo salsa.

More recently, my wife requested a simple order of falafel, not as part of a plate. We got a lot of balls!

(Seriously, these orders usually include 12 or 13.)

Something my wife and I discovered over a recent breakfast at the new Turkish restaurant Cafe De Wan in Casselberry is that you can add a thick, syrupy, sweet grape molasses called pekmez to tahini, and it becomes like the Turkish version of peanut butter and jelly. I bought a big jar of pekmez at Global Bazaar, a Turkish grocery store, and sometimes she will dab a little into the side cups of The Hummus Guy’s tahini for a uniquely sweet treat.

This is Guy’s chicken schnitzel, thin chicken tenders that are breaded and fried to perfection, also over mujjadara. They are great too, don’t get me wrong, but if I come here for chicken, I’m going to stick to the chicken shawarma and leave the chicken tenders to my beloved Chicken Fire. But the chicken schnitzel had a lot of flavor and has never been greasy, dry, or burnt. With so many restaurants serving and even specializing in chicken tenders, a lot of them half-ass it, but not Guy! This is a man who takes so much pride in his product, you can tell. It is refreshing, and the side of hummus topped with more spicy sechug sauce is even more refreshing.

This is the sabich pita sandwich, which would have looked a lot prettier if I ate it on premises instead of having Guy wrap it up to go. It is a sandwich of baked eggplant, a brown boiled egg, chopped salad, fresh herbs, amba sauce (made of mangoes and pickles), and tahini. It tasted better than this photo looks, I swear. Next time I’ll get one and eat it while I wait for the rest of my to-go order.

Likewise, the kebab pita sandwich from my third visit, with two grilled beef patties mixed with herbs and spices, would have looked a lot nicer if I ate it while hanging out at one of the tiny tables set up outside the truck. There were tomatoes and scallions in this sandwich, along with the hummus and tahini. I asked for some of the amba sauce in this one too, once I found out what it actually was. I love the intense sweetness and tartness of mango, and I always think something acidic is the missing ingredient in most dishes that brings them from good to great.

This is one of the many 16-ounce containers of hummus I’ve brought home, because it is such a rich, creamy, tasty hummus. None of the premade commercial brands at the supermarket can compare. It comes topped with parsley, a little olive oil, and that spicy sechug sauce. My wife has been eating a lot of roasted or baked sweet potatoes at home, especially the incredible Japanese murasaki sweet potatoes they sell at Trader Joe’s. I never add any oil during the roasting process, but she likes to apply hummus and/or tahini when she eats them! She is definitely in her sweet potato and hummus era, thanks to The Hummus Guy.

This is Guy’s babaganush, roasted eggplant with tahini and garlic. It can be used as a spread or a dip, and it is one of my wife’s favorite things in the world to eat, so we try it everywhere. This babaganush is somewhat more tahini-forward than others we’ve tried, where you taste more of a smoky flavor from the roasted eggplant.

To fully compare and contrast, I also ordered the eggplant mayo salad, which is roasted eggplant with mayonnaise instead of tahini, as well as the requisite garlic. I’m not quite as into tahini as my wife, but I am a sucker for mayo-based deli salads (macaroni, potato, egg, tuna, chicken, cole slaw), and I honestly liked this one better than the babaganush.

The Hummus Guy has become a new Friday evening tradition for us, since he is not there on Saturdays. He closes at 7 PM, so I try to make it over there in the last hour he’s open. We’ve been going through a 16-ounce container of his hummus each week, in addition to whatever else I bring home. Guy is a stand-up guy, so friendly and welcoming, and his food is second to none in the Orlando area. He’s always busy, so people are definitely discovering his amazing food and spreading the word, and now it’s my turn to do so. Guy’s wife Abbie, who was so patient with me when I first texted to find out their location and hours, is a lovely person too. Try their food soon — the shawarma, the mujjadara, the falafel, the hummus, the tahini, the fresh-baked pita bread — and I promise you won’t regret it!

Selva Rosa Cocina and Bar

Selva Rosa Cocina and Bar (https://soon.selvarosa.com/) is a gorgeous new Mexican restaurant with some Japanese fusion elements, located in Maitland. It took over the old location of Teak, a casual restaurant we loved at first, but the quality faltered over the years until it closed. (This may become relevant later, stalwart Saboscrivnerinos.) It is on one corner of The Village apartment complex on 17-92 (not to be confused with the infamous Villages elsewhere in Central Florida), with Lim Ros Thai Cuisine on the opposite corner.

The interior is very modern and pretty, with plenty of pink neon signs and fake plant walls, designed to be trendy and Instagrammable for photo ops. They are going for sexy, sophisticated style. More about that later, I promise.

We have been there twice now, and they always bring out thin, crispy tortilla chips that are well-salted and are not greasy at all, along with a simple, tasty table salsa.

I took photos of the menu, because they still aren’t available on the shell of a website. You may want to right-click on these to open them in new tabs and then expand them:

My wife ordered a black sesame latte on our first visit, perfect for our early lunch on a chilly Saturday. She said it was delicious.

I ordered this pair of Ensenada-style tacos, one for each of us, with fried grouper, shredded cabbage, pico de gallo, and habanero salsa on soft flour tortillas. I love a good fish taco, and they are surprisingly hard to come by in Orlando. This was excellent, in part because grouper is one of the tastiest fish… and also surprisingly hard to come by in Orlando.

My wife ordered pollo a la brasa, half of a deliciously marinated and grilled chicken, served artfully on a banana leaf with avocado crema and fresh cilantro on top, with a mound of the best Mexican rice I’ve ever tried anywhere and excellent black beans topped with queso fresco.

I was going to go with something else, but mentioned to our server David that I had a hard time deciding and would have to return soon. He suggested one of their most popular dishes, the short rib taquiza, a sizzling fajitas-sort of setup with a giant beef short rib, prepared with birria-style seasoning and a huge bone that slides right out. I know he was trying to upsell me, because this is a $38 dish, but I am a sucker for slow-braised, tender meats on the bone, and I already like short ribs, so I changed my order. No regrets. This thing was a beast, and it came out smoking and sizzling to beat the band. Even I got three meals out of this massive meat, but believe it or not, I am consciously trying to eat less, and also to eat healthier when I can. Short rib isn’t health food by any stretch, but at least I didn’t devour the whole thing in one sitting. (I always joke that my mom doesn’t approve of ordering fajitas at restaurants because people shouldn’t draw attention to themselves with those sizzling platters, but the main reason is because she doesn’t like Mexican food.)

The short rib taquiza came with another mound of that terrific Mexican rice (did I mention it’s the best I’ve ever had?), a bowl of rich, thick beans with chunks of unctuous pork belly, and a salad of shredded iceberg lettuce mixed with sliced tomatoes, raw white onion, and a little guacamole.It also came with warm, soft, handmade corn tortillas, probably the best corn tortillas either of us have ever had in Orlando, but I failed to get a photo of them. My wife and I loved the corn tortillas so much, we planned to get more on our next visit.

My wife ordered this dessert after her first choice (something with pistachios) was sold out. It looked cool, but she didn’t care much for it, and I had no interest in something chocolatey. It didn’t look appetizing to me at all. By the way, that was a shortbread-like cookie underneath it, not a layer of frosting or whipped cream.
It had raspberry puree in the middle, which she didn’t like or want. Back at home, I performed a bit of surgery, slicing it open and removing the raspberry filling for her. It wasn’t anything mind-blowing, and neither of us would ever get it again.

We returned the following weekend for a later lunch on “Superb Owl” Sunday, figuring the restaurant would not be too busy. We were right. But even though it wasn’t busy at all, it was a very different experience. What a difference a week makes!

She ordered another sesame latte, which was served in an attractive glass this time:

This time, we made it a point to arrive after 1 PM so we could hopefully try one of their sushi or similar raw fish dishes, since the menu said they do not serve them before 1. Instead of a sushi roll, my wife chose the ahi tuna truffle appetizer for us to share, with a mound of raw ahi tuna over diced avocado with red onion, cilantro, and their sweet soy truffle sauce, served with crunchy fried cassava chips and crispy tostadas. I am not a truffle fan, but this whole dish worked really well together. Ahi tuna is one of my favorite things to eat in the world, and she liked it too. By the way, all our food — apps and entrees alike — came out at the exact same time. Not ideal, but not something that would usually annoy me. Stay tuned, true believers.

Knowing we would have plenty of leftovers to enjoy over the next few days, I selected another pair of tacos, since we were both intrigued by this combination. These were the tacos bacanos, with ropa vieja (a Cuban dish of shredded beef stewed in a savory, tomatoey broth), black beans, avocado, and salty crumbles of queso fresco. These particular tacos were supposed to come on “plantain tortillas,” which I expected might be like tostones, but fried into a curved taco shell shape. As far as I could tell, these were pretty typical corn tortillas. Once I got home and started writing this review, I realized the menu said these tacos should also include avocado crema (so good on my wife’s grilled chicken on our previous visit) and pickled onions, but ours didn’t come with either. Missing or switched ingredients would be a recurring theme this time around, leading to more perplexing disappointment.

My wife loves a good steak, and she ordered the churrasco al carbon for her entree, figuring she would get multiple meals out of it. The grilled angus skirt steak arrived looking beautiful, topped with a little chimichurri and a few hot pink pickled onions. The kitchen cooked it rare as she requested, something that some other trendy restaurants just couldn’t get right. It came with yuca fries, black beans, and “seasonal vegetables” — mostly roasted squash.

This time I got the fajitas I almost ordered last time, when David recommended the colossal short rib instead. This was the asado Selva Rosa, a sizzling setup that was supposed to come with guajillo lime chicken, adobo grilled chicken, achiote shrimp, and one of my favorite Mexican meats, chorizo sausage. Since I’m trying to eat more protein and fewer carbs, it seemed like a nice way to try multiple things, but I fully admit that the chorizo was the deciding factor for me. So I thought it was a little odd that our new server asked how I wanted the meat cooked. Chicken, shrimp, and crumbly chorizo? I was surprised, so I hesitantly said “medium, so the chicken is cooked all the way through.” I just wasn’t expecting that question. I like my steak rare, but not my chicken!
So when it arrived, I couldn’t differentiate between two different types of chicken, the chorizo was noticeably absent, and there was also some steak that was tough and overdone. The menu didn’t say anything about steak, and if I had known steak would be involved, I would never have asked for it medium, because as I said, I like my steak rare. The hits just kept on coming! Honestly, I wonder if someone in the kitchen mixed up “churrasco” (steak) and “chorizo” (sausage).

It came with the same side salad, refried beans (not as good as last time, with no big chunks of pork belly or any other meat), and Mexican rice (also not as good as last time, when I told ya it was the best Mexican rice I’ve ever had).

This time I remembered to take a photo of the fresh corn tortillas when I unwrapped them from the foil, soft and steaming. But these looked different — certainly not as good. I gave them to my wife, who loved them last time, and I think she agreed they weren’t as good.

I asked our server what happened to the chorizo, because that’s why I ordered this dish. She said she would check, then some time passed and she said the kitchen would make me some chorizo, then more time passed and they brought this out. This was definitely not the orangey-red, spicy, savory, greasy, crumbly chorizo I’ve enjoyed in countless authentic tacos, burritos, and tortas. This was a slight step up from a salchicha, not that different from a hot dog, but possibly with a natural casing that got crisped up. Full disclosure: they took $5 off the bill because of this without me asking them to, but all these little things were adding up, and we were both feeling annoyed.

At this point, we had a lot of leftovers and were losing steam (and patience), so I asked our server for the Rosa en Fuego dessert they were out of last time, as well as some boxes. She brought us two boxes for all this food, so we had to go back and forth a couple of times to get enough boxes to pack everything up, and then a separate request for a paper bag to carry everything in. I refuse to leave expensive food behind at restaurants, even if more and more places are starting to act weird about offering to-go containers. It was starting to feel like a comedy sketch, and I imagined a domineering manager berating the wait staff about giving customers too many to-go boxes, and that’s costing them money. It really felt like that could be happening behind the scenes, and I’m a pretty chill, patient, conflict-averse guy, but it all seemed so unnecessary and ridiculous.

This was the Rosa en Fuego, a pretty large and attractive dome.
I never even saw the dessert menu, but my wife wanted to try it because it included pistachio and rosewater, two ingredients she loves. I joked that Pistachio and Rosewater sounds like a law firm for elves, and we riffed for a while about how they practiced enchanted forest law, like toadstool landlord/tenant issues, lily pad eminent domain, and zoning ordinances for businesses inside holes in tree trunks.

What we didn’t realize was that this would be a whole production, with some kind of alcohol set ablaze with a torch:

Then poured onto the dome, flames and all (hence the “en fuego”):

The sugary dome started to burn and melt away:

And it ended up being this little melty, shriveled thing with a light green bit of pistachio cake underneath. I was never interested, and she said it tasted like kerosene (probably butane, to be more accurate). I’m sure the influencers will go gaga over it, posting video of the burning, the melting, and their inevitable reaction shots.

As an aside, I noticed the men’s restroom looked surprisingly luxurious, with gleaming black urinals and fancy faucets for the sinks, but when my wife returned from the women’s restroom early in our meal, she looked upset. The toilet in the one accessible stall (which her rollator could not fit inside) was clogged and overflowing, and she said it made her lose her appetite. That kind of set the mood for our entire lunch. On the way out, after I paid our bill and tipped well, she told the manager about the restroom situation in a polite and diplomatic way, and we both looked into the eyes of a man who had no fucks left to give.

After two visits a week apart, after how much we enjoyed everything the first time and how many corners were cut the second time, our excitement has cooled like that weird melted dessert. My wife put it best: more than the food (which features trends like wagyu and truffle and fusion sushi), Selva Rosa Cocina and Bar is all about the vibes. The decor, the menu options, the presentations, the fact that ingredients are substituted or missing without warning and nobody seems too concerned, the checked-out service — it all feels aimed at trendmongers who care more about how their photos will look than about the overall quality, and most importantly of all, how they look in those photos. For us, that holds no appeal, and yes, I am fully aware of the irony of me taking a lot of photos for the purposes of this review. I realize this is still a relatively new restaurant, so they may be working out kinks and/or bugs, but the colossal downgrade in our experience from one week to the next was noteworthy. It is probably clear that Selva Rosa is not our scene, so I wanted to tell a full, clear, unbiased story so you can determine whether or not it may be your scene. Let me know what you decide.

Rawsha Mediterranean Cuisine

Rawsha Mediterranean Cuisine (https://rawshamediterraneancuisine.com/) is the first Iraqi restaurant I know of to open in Orlando, and definitely the first one I’ve ever tried. It is a very casual restaurant in a strip plaza at 8956 Turkey Lake Road, Orlando, FL 32819, easily accessible from Sand Lake Road, especially if you take I-4 and get off on Exit 74. There are plenty of tables, but no booths. You take a seat and a server will take your order, so there is no lining up at a register to place your order and pay up front.

This is their chicken shawarma, ready to be sliced off this huge rotating vertical spit:

And this is their rotating beef shawarma. More on that later, I promise.

They have their whole mise en place setup for assembling wraps and platters with carrots, cucumbers, tomatoes, onions, pickles, pickled red cabbage, pickled turnips, olives, and more.

I ordered this hala platter for my wife, figuring she would get two or more meals out of it, but I planned to taste the meats too, for the sake of journalism. It included an Iraqi kebab made of beef and lamb (on the left), a chicken kofte (in the middle; almost like a grilled meatloaf made of ground chicken with savory herbs and spices), and a lamb chop (on the right), grilled to medium. These platters come with two choices of sides: rice, fries, hummus, baba ghanouj, or fatoush. You can see we went with rice as one of the options. I was glad that my wife enjoyed all three meats, but the lamb chop seemed to be her favorite. I didn’t try it, but I can vouch for the Iraqi kebab and chicken kofte being really, really delicious. I enjoyed the char-grilled tomato, onion, and jalapeno later, and I ate the orange-looking flatbread at the top, brushed with their special red sauce and lightly grilled.

Baba ghanouj, that Middle Eastern dip of roasted eggplant and tahini paste, is one of my wife’s favorite things to eat in the world. Normally it takes on a smoky flavor from the eggplant roasting, but Rawsha’s version of baba ghanouj was light on the smoke and heavy on the tahini. Not bad, just different.

I also ordered fatoush, a delicious salad made with lettuce, tomato, red onions, cucumbers, crispy bits of fried flatbread, and I think I tasted parley and mint in there too. The dressing was very light, and may have included pomegranate molasses. I liked this more than my wife did.

This was the beef arabi, something else I expected we would split, but she wasn’t into it. It was a flatbread wrap with beef, red onions, and herbs, crisped up on the flattop grill and sliced into pretty slices, almost like how a sushi roll is served. It wasn’t crispy by the time I got it home, so this is one better enjoyed on premises.

The beef arabi came with a side of a delicious creamy garlic sauce (toom), as well as cole slaw, slices of crunchy, fresh cucumber and carrot, pickles, and pickled turnips. I thought the garlic sauce helped the beef arabi tremendously, but something more acidic inside or on top would have helped it too, like a hot sauce. Luckily, I have a house full of hot sauces.

These fries were limp and cold by the time I got home, which was reasonably foreseeable. I jazzed them up with some spicy Filipino banana ketchup, though.

The main reason I wanted to try Rawsha was to try their “crispy shawarma” that they demonstrated making in an Instagram video. It looked so good in the video, especially with all the ingredients. Even though I arrived right at 11 AM when the restaurant opened, they told me it would be 20 to 30 minutes for the shawarma to be ready. That was fine with me. I drove across town meaning to try that one specific thing, and for a change, I had nowhere to rush off to, so I killed time on my phone. It ended up taking a full hour, but whatever, these things happen (and often to me).

I’m sure the shawarma would have been in its ideal state eaten hot and fresh at the restaurant, but it took so long, and the rest of my takeout order was ready and had been sitting around for a while, so I had them wrap it up to go as well. At least it looked good, having been brushed with the aforementioned special red sauce and crisped up on all its outer surfaces on the grill. It did lose some of its crispiness on the way home, which was inevitable, but I couldn’t wait any longer.

It tasted fine, but it didn’t have any of the cool stuff inside that they included in their video: no pickles, tomatoes, tahini, or pomegranate molasses. It was just the beef sliced off the spit, and that was it. I think those other flavors, especially the acidic flavors and crunchy textures, would have balanced it out much better. Was it worth the wait? Maybe not, but I hope if you go to try it, you won’t deal with a wait like that. I would totally try it again if I could enjoy it crispy and fresh in the restaurant. Otherwise, the next time I’m craving beef shawarma, I think I will return to The Cairo Express instead. And since I visited Rawsha, I found a place that serves the best chicken shawarma I’ve ever had in my life, which I will review soon enough. But I would still return to Rawsha, especially for that Iraqi kebab, chicken kofte, and fatoush salad.

So that’s my first experience at Rawsha, raw(sha) and unfiltered. When you try it yourself (which you should), dining in would be the preferable option, as it usually is. Maybe coming later in the day is a safer bet if you don’t have a cushion of time to kill. When you taste this Iraqi food, you might find yourself singing “Oh baby, I like it RAWSHA!”

Il Pescatore

Il Pescatore (https://ilpescatoreonline.com/) is an old-school Italian restaurant in Orlando’s Milk District, nestled between Vietnamese restaurants Pho Vinh and Pho Hoa on Primrose Drive, directly south of East Colonial Drive. Se7en Bites and Smoke & Donuts BBQ are just past it, too. The Milk District is full of treasured restaurants, and Il Pescatore turned out to be one more. It’s not new, and many Orlando locals probably know it already, but it’s still relatively new to me, okay?

I honestly don’t go out for Italian food very often anymore (excluding pizza and my beloved Italian subs), since I make myself multiple salads a week at home and work wonders with pasta. But my first visit to Il Pescatore two years ago was kind of a treat, and also an emotional milestone, because two valued co-workers and great friends took me to lunch there on my last day of a job I had held for 15 years. Even though I worked close to the Milk District for that many years, I had never gone to Il Pescatore before, because I thought it was a fancy, upscale restaurant, and those are usually not my thing. I was wrong! It was cozy, comfortable, and welcoming, and the food was super-solid.

This was my side salad, with fresh, crunchy iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, red onions, a bit of shredded red cabbage, and an excellent house-made vinaigrette dressing that really stood out.

One of my colleagues ordered the tri-color salad with romaine lettuce, tomatoes, and fresh mozzarella, topped with the same house dressing.

Another colleague ordered this Greek salad, with mixed greens, feta cheese, kalamata olives, tomatoes, cucumbers, whole pepperoncini peppers, red onions, and that incredible house dressing.

I did not try this funghetti al ‘aglio, mushrooms sautéed in olive oil-based garlic sauce, but my colleagues seemed to really enjoy it.

This was good ol’ bruschetta, a crowd-pleasing classic, with tomatoes, garlic, and herbs tossed in olive oil and served over toasted Italian bread. We all dug into this appetizer and enjoyed it.

This was my colleague’s calzone, which would have been stuffed with ricotta cheese and mozzarella. Like the lasagna, you can’t go wrong with something like this! By the way, Il Pescatore’s red sauce slaps. You can tell they make it fresh in house and aren’t just opening some industrial food service can.

I ordered this baked lasagna from the lunch menu, and while I wish I remembered it better after two years, I’m sure it was great, as anything smothered and baked in red sauce and mozzarella cheese would be. Lasagna is one of my favorite dishes of all time, but I make such an amazing version myself (especially in the winter), I rarely order it at restaurants. Once in a while, I make an exception, and I’m sure I chose wisely here.

This combo sub was definitely mine too: ham, genoa salami, capicola, provolone cheese, shredded iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, and more of that house vinaigrette on a nice, soft roll, served cold. I have a hard time passing up an Italian sub, and while this one wasn’t the biggest or the best of all time, it definitely hit the spot.

I didn’t order the tiramisu, but my colleague/mentor/friend was kind enough to offer me a taste. It’s a wonderful dessert I rarely partake in but always enjoy whenever I do: an architectural marvel of lady finger cookies layered with mascarpone cheese and espresso.

I returned to Il Pescatore this past week with the same two now-former co-workers, along with a third. Of the four of us, only one person is still at the old workplace. I think the world of these people, and I am so glad we have kept in touch. The last time we got together to catch up over a meal, earlier this year, we also ended up at an Italian restaurant, Terralina Crafted Italian at Disney Springs. This time, it was a lot closer to people’s work and home (and for me, they are one in the same).

I ordered an appetizer of fried smelts, hoping to share them with the group, but my one male colleague had one, the two ladies wanted absolutely nothing to do with them, and I enjoyed the rest. I am a huge sardine eater, so finding small fried fish like sardines and smelts at restaurants is a rare treat. Olympia Greek Restaurant used to have good ones, but it closed years ago. These were very good, especially dunked in Il Pescatore’s wonderful red sauce.

My vegetarian colleague ordered this lovely pizza bianco, a white pizza topped with mozzarella and ricotta cheeses, sliced tomatoes, crushed garlic, and fresh basil. I thought she ordered the 12″, but it seemed a lot bigger than that.

Someone got the chicken parmesan with linguini, which looked like a HUGE portion:

And someone else got the similar-looking eggplant parmesan, also with linguini:

Since I studied the menu over the two years since my first visit, I learned about a dish on Il Pescatore’s dinner menu called tortellini di Stefano. It sounded so perfect, but it isn’t on the lunch menu. Luckily, when I mentioned it to our server, she told me they could still make it, but there wasn’t a more moderately priced lunch portion. Hey, that was fine with me! It was really satisfying and different enough from the pasta dishes I make at home that I felt like I made the best possible choice. It arrived with a melty, oven-baked layer of provolone (not mozzarella!) cheese, and I do love provolone.

After folding in the cheese, you can get a better idea of what the dish looks like beneath. The tortellini pasta was in a “creamy meat sauce with a touch of prosciutto,” almost like a cross between a creamier Bolognese meat sauce and a vodka sauce. And prosciutto is one of my favorite foods — not just meats, but foods in general. I shook some red pepper flakes onto the pasta to add a bit of heat. They aren’t just for pizza anymore! This tortellini di Stefano wowed me. I would totally order it again whenever I return to Il Pescatore, and hopefully that won’t take me two more years.

“Red sauce” Italian is pure comfort food for me. My family used to go to Anthony’s Pizzeria in Kendall throughout the ’80s and into the mid-’90s, and when it closed, they switched to getting takeout from The Big Cheese, a South Miami/Coral Gables institution. I love a good bowl of pasta in red sauce, which sometimes I make from scratch and sometimes I leave to the experts (Rao’s). When I’m stressed or depressed (which happens a lot, surprise surprise), pasta and a good salad and some bread help get me through, and when I’m feeling celebratory, relaxed, and relieved, the same meal sounds just as good then.

After trying the humble but excellent food at Il Pescatore twice now, I know they have a lot more interesting options than the same pasta and sauce I can easily make myself at home. The tortellini de Stefano was a dynamic dish, but next time, I might try the linguini scungilli, with conch in a garlic tomato sauce. If I’m feeling flush, I might treat myself to the zuppa di mare Trapanese, a Sicilian seafood platter with shrimp, mussels, calamari, clams, and snapper, all simmered in tomato sauce. Maybe I’ll just get the eggplant parm like my colleague ordered this week, since my attempts at eggplant parm at home never come out well. I know Il Pescatore won’t let me down! They haven’t so far.

GG Korean BBQ

GG Korean BBQ (https://ggkoreanbbq.com/) is an all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue restaurant located at 5319 West Colonial Drive in Orlando’s Pine Hills neighborhood. I recently went for the first time with two good friends, including one of my inspirations as a food writer, the illustrious Amy Drew Thompson of the Orlando Sentinel. It was the first time I ever got to meet her in person, and I’m sure I made a great first impression, stuffing my face with delicious Korean food that we cooked ourselves on the tabletop grill.

This was my second time doing all-you-can-eat Korean barbecue ever, after trying it with a friend at Hae Jang Chon in Koreatown in L.A. last year. I was lucky to be dining with two sophisticated, experienced, worldly gastronomes who knew what they were doing much more than I.

GG Korean BBQ offers two options: $27.99 per person for the basic all you can eat experience (seven different fresh and marinated meats), or $39.99 per person for a more premium selection: 18 different fresh and marinated meats, plus two seafood options, shrimp and baby octopus. I was curious about the expanded option, and my friends were both kind enough to humor me and go along with it. Just FYI, your whole party has to choose the same option.

Many Korean meals start out with banchan, tiny plates of sharable side orders. My favorite thing here was the slightly sweet and crunchy yellow pickled daikon radish slices on the bottom left. I am not a fan of bean sprouts, so I left them alone, and as much as I have tried to become a kimchi fan (especially as a lover of sauerkraut and cabbage in general), it hasn’t happened for me yet. I tried a customary piece but left the rest for my colleagues. A sharp-eyed reader told me more about the yellow pickled radish: “The yellow pickle is called Takuan. It is a Japanese pickle that was invented in the 17th century by the Zen Buddhist monk named Soho Takuan. The pickle spread to Korea and very popular.” Thank you so much, bkhuna!

Both dining choices come with a variety of other sides to choose from. This was corn cheese — kernels of fresh corn heated over the grill with shredded mozzarella cheese, and probably some butter too. It looked better when it was done, and it was a decadent hit at our table.

I really liked these japchae, savory translucent noodles made out of sweet potato starch, seasoned with sesame oil. They had a nice al dente chew.

We also tried the steamed egg side, but I didn’t get a good picture of it.

Here were three dips for our barbecued meats. That was a seasoned salt on the left that accented the grilled flavors perfectly. I really liked the sauce in the middle, and the one on the right had its own spicy charm.

When you go out for Korean barbecue, the group orders a few meats at a time. Sometimes the server cooks them for you, and sometimes you get left to your own devices. There can be a lot going on, so every group needs an experienced leader to make sure the meat is cooking but not overcooking, and that everyone has something ready to eat at all times. When you’re all having a nice conversation, that can be distracting, but my friend stayed on top of everything for us.

This mixed grill included beef bulgogi on the bottom (a sweet and savory marinated meat that is a great “gateway” dish for folks who are unfamiliar with Korean cuisine), and I honestly don’t remember if the two long pieces of meat along the sides were beef rib fingers or pork belly. I’m sure we got both, though. That’s a thick slice of onion in the top right and some big slices of mushroom on the left — more for them!

Here’s a close-up of the beautiful, rich, marbled meat that was on top in the above photo. I think this was ribeye, due to that lush, lovely marbling.

More meat! Those off-white thingees on the right are large and small beef intestines. I first tried those at an all-you-can-eat Argentinian-Jewish churrascuria restaurant in Altamonte Springs called Steak in the City, similar to the Brazilian all-you-can-eat rodizio concepts (like Adega Gaucha and Texas de Brazil). Steak in the City closed abruptly over 15 years ago, taking my good friend and former roommate’s deposit for a wedding rehearsal dinner with them. (Luckily, he paid with a credit card, so he was able to get refunded, but the restaurant folks disappeared into the night with his money.) Anyway, the intestines (Steak in the City called them chinchulines) grill up with a crispy exterior, but they are mostly soft and chewy. They don’t have a strong flavor, but I’d say they are worth trying at least once, if you’ve never had them before. They would mostly take on the flavor of a marinade or dipping sauce.

Even more meat! We were all losing steam by this point.
What do you think those thin, wavy, round slices of meat on the right are?

They were fresh beef tongue, sliced almost paper-thin. As a Jewish person, I can’t go somewhere that offers tongue and not try it, whether it’s a Jewish deli, a Mexican taqueria, a Vietnamese pho restaurant, or in this case, a Korean barbecue establishment. These slices grilled up to a nondescript brownish-gray color, so they looked a lot interesting here, before cooking. But they were extremely tender!

Anyway, I’m glad I went with two experienced, worldly gourmets who had done this before, because I trusted my one friend to do a lot of the cooking for us (he’s a team player and a tireless mensch), and I followed their lead. It was a really nice lunch with two of my favorite people in Orlando, but here’s my hot take: I cook at home all the time (although I don’t grill because I don’t have a grill), but if I go out to a restaurant, I would rather rely on the chef to prepare food for me than have to do it myself. Most of the time I go to restaurants these days, I either fly solo or bring home takeout to share with my wife, and you can’t really do Korean barbecue in either scenario, so it’s a moot point anyway. I feel similar about hot pot places – fun with a group once or twice as an interactive activity, but maybe more trouble than they are worth. But if you’re going to do Korean barbecue, especially with a good group, I think GG Korean BBQ would be a fabulous place to enjoy it together.

Pann’s (Los Angeles)

It has been a while since I visited the legendary diner Pann’s (https://www.panns.com/), a Los Angeles mainstay located at 6710 La Tijera Blvd in the Westchester neighborhood, not too far from Inglewood, Ladera Heights, and LAX. Pann’s is a beautiful example of Googie architecture, a “space-age” style that proliferated in L.A. in the mid-20th Century. The Pann’s restaurant building and its iconic neon sign were designed by architects Eldon Davis and Helen Liu Fong, and the restaurant opened in 1958. Think of The Jetsons, or diners and gas stations from the 1950s and early ’60s, and you’ll see it. A previous Saboscrivner review subject, Bob’s Big Boy in Burbank, is another Googie time capsule still going strong today. Here’s a good blog article about the history of both Pann’s and its Googie style, and another shorter piece from the Los Angeles Conservancy organization. One of my favorite culinary websites, Eater, listed Pann’s on its 38 Essential L.A. Restaurants, and Los Angeles Magazine wrote about Pann’s in its piece A Love Letter to L.A.’s Eternally Charming Diners and Coffee Shops.

Anyway, I went to Pann’s with my friend and former supervisor for a late lunch/early dinner before an All Elite Wrestling event at the Kia Center in L.A., so AEW fans can figure out how long ago this was. There are plenty of comfy padded booths and seats along the counter, and we grabbed two of those seats. As long as I’m not out dining with my wife, who has back problems (hence my quest for booths at most local restaurants), I usually enjoy sitting at a counter or bar to eat.

My friend is a fried chicken connoisseur, so he ordered this two-piece fried chicken dinner with mashed potatoes and gravy and collard greens. I didn’t try any of it (not my place to do so), but he seemed to love it.

As hard as I try to not drink my calories, I am a sucker for lemonade, and I couldn’t resist a “home made drink” called a watermelon cooler. It was so sweet and fruity and refreshing, kind of like a Mexican agua fresca or “melonade.” It totally hit the spot, and I appreciated the free refills.

There was so much I wanted to try on Pann’s menu! I love a good diner, and Orlando really isn’t a diner city. But I was full from another good restaurant meal earlier that day (which I still have yet to review), and I didn’t want to feel bloated and uncomfortable heading into a wrestling show that promised to be over four hours long. I didn’t even order Pann’s onion rings, and my longtime readers know I like to try onion rings anywhere and everywhere!

Instead, I played it safe and stuck to breakfast food. I got a hotcake plate with a stack of three pancakes, two eggs fried over-medium, and beef hot links (sausages). It was all so delicious. I rarely order breakfast food anywhere unless I’m at my beloved Waffle House, but this was a wise choice, even with the siren song of fried chicken or catfish or a patty melt. The pancakes were so fluffy; they might have been the best pancakes I’ve ever had. The beef hot links were great too. I figured it would have more flavor and be more interesting overall than the pork sausage patties that were also an option, and I’m sure I made the best possible choice. They were pleasantly spicy (not overly so), and had a nice coarsely ground texture.I am the biggest Twin Peaks fan I know, and I always think of breakfast-loving Special Agent Dale Cooper’s line, “Nothing beats the taste sensation when maple syrup collides with ham.” While a ham steak was yet another option I passed up on Pann’s menu, do you think I enjoyed the warm syrup coming into contact with the spicy beef sausage? You’d better believe it!

Pann’s is certainly not haute cuisine by any metric, but that has never been my thing. I loved it, and I was so glad we fit it into one of my L.A. work trips. I love a good diner, I’m a sucker for the Googie architecture style, and it was a perfect meal on our way to a memorable evening of choreographed violence. One thing I love about L.A. is how much history and character so many restaurants have (like Bob’s Big Boy, Langer’s Deli, Philippe the Original, The Prince, Genghis Cohen, HMS Bounty, and others I haven’t even reviewed yet), especially compared to living in Orlando, a much younger city. Pann’s is the perfect example of history and character, but it doesn’t coast on its reputation at all. The food they serve is a testament to why it has lasted so many decades.

Thailicious

Thailicious (https://thailiciousfl.com/) is a very casual Thai restaurant in the suburbs of Longwood. The building looks like a house, complete with outside tables on a covered, screened-in front porch. My wife and I have gone three times so far, and we really like it, enough to already consider ourselves semi-regulars. I want to work our way through the entire menu, but their dishes are so good, it is hard to not default back to past favorites.

My best advice for going for dinner is to arrive early, because it always gets super-busy. The people of Longwood know what’s good, and they also may not want to drive far and wide for newer, trendier Thai restaurants, knowing they have a wonderful, well-kept secret in their own back yard.

On all of our visits, my wife starts out with sweet, cool, creamy, slightly smoky Thai iced tea, her beverage of choice:

She usually orders summer rolls, one of her go-to favorites at any Vietnamese or Thai restaurant. Thailicious’ version comes with shrimp, rice noodles, carrots, and Thai basil leaves, wrapped in fresh rice paper for a chewy texture and served with a sweet peanut sauce.

On our first visit, we also ordered a crab rangoon appetizer, just for the heck of it. I hadn’t had crab rangoon in years, probably not since the days of the all-you-can-eat China Jade buffet on East Colonial Drive near Fashion Square Mall, but these were better than I remembered. They were fried to crispy perfection, not greasy or heavy at all, with sweet cream cheese inside (but nary a hint of crab, as usual).
These were so good, we got them again on our third visit.

The first time in, my wife ordered her go-to noodle dish, pad Thai, since we are now on a quest to discover all the best versions of pad Thai in and around Orlando. This was one of the best versions either of us have tried around here. The rice noodles were sauteed with pork (but you can also choose chicken, tofu, or beef or shrimp for a small upcharge), eggs, ground peanuts, bean sprouts, and green onions. The sauce was actually kind of tangy and citrusy for a change. A lot of places serve pad Thai that is too sweet, and it never has that tangy funk that I love.

I ordered my own go-to noodle dish, pad kee mao, also known as drunken noodles. These are wider, flatter noodles, sauteed with onions, bell peppers, carrots, zucchini (a nice touch that nobody else seems to add), fresh basil (so important to the overall flavor of this dish), and scallions, and I asked them to hold the bean sprouts. I also got pork as my meat of choice, and it was a wise choice. This was a delicious version of drunken noodles. The dish is always sweet, but I ordered mine medium-spicy, because I like my Thai noodles like I like my women, sweet and spicy. Next time I’ll try Thai-spicy, now that I know I can more than handle the medium-spicy baseline.
Well, my wife was brave enough to try the drunken noodles, and she loved them so much that she ordered them (mild, of course) on our second visit, and again on our third! I tell ya, this dish is a crowd-pleaser. If you’ve never tried them before, either at Thailicious or your Thai restaurant of choice, give them a chance, and you won’t be sorry. She wasn’t.

I tried something completely new and different on our second visit: a noodle curry dish from northern Thailand called khao soi, made with egg noodles, napa cabbage, pickled sweet peppers, and pork (instead of chicken or tofu). The noodles came in the creamy, medium-spicy curry kind of like a thick soup, and our very friendly and patient server gave me chopsticks with it, utensils you don’t usually get at Thai restaurants. It was nice gambling on a brand new, unfamiliar dish and enjoying it so much. I’d totally order it again, but that would also defeat my purpose of making my way through the Thailicious menu, as I intend to do in the months and years to come.

Get ready for the noodle pull!

It was so good, it inspired me to start ordering this dish elsewhere, to compare other restaurants’ versions to the first khao soi I’ve ever had here at Thailicious. You know what they say: You never forget your first time!

Then we got coconut sticky rice for dessert on visit number two, which we never order, but we loved it so much that we wondered why. What a delicious, sweet treat, especially topped with a huge scoop of creamy coconut ice cream! We haven’t been living right, avoiding sweet sticky rice, but better late than never.

On our third visit, I ordered the laab gai, a dish of ground chicken seasoned with lime juice, shallots, roasted rice powder, and scallions, served at the hot spice level, on a bed of fresh, crunchy iceberg lettuce. I am still relatively new to laab (sometimes called larb) after being introduced to an incredible version with ground pork at Isan Zaap Thai Cafe last year and then trying a chicken version at Lim Ros Thai Cuisine earlier this year. I would rank this one between the two.

I also got the spicy basil from their traditional spicy Thai dishes menu, with sautéed pork, sweet basil leaves, onions, zucchini, and red and green bell peppers, at a hot spice level. It came with a bowl of jasmine rice on the side, which I mixed in to soak up the delicious flavors. They always get the pork so tender here at Thailicious. In fact, not only are the flavors fresh and strong, but everything is the perfect consistency.

It was delicious, but I always return to noodle dishes, so I’ll give the edge to the fabulous drunken noodles, pad Thai, and that amazing khao soi from visit #2. Now that I’ve written a review with a good bit of variety, I will start returning to those old favorites, because I will definitely return to Thailicious.

Orlando has several Thai restaurants, many of which are new, hot, and trendy. This Longwood mainstay isn’t hot or trendy, but it is so damn good, without any pretension or attempts to be the new influencer-illuminati destination. That makes me love it even more. It’s a friendly neighborhood sort of place with next-level food, comfortable booths, and warm and welcoming service. Just don’t get there too late on Friday or weekend evenings, because the locals know what’s good, and you will have to wait!

Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner

Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner (https://www.moakaidiner.com/) just opened the week before last in the old Mongolorian location at 2217 East Colonial Drive in Orlando, just west of Bumby Avenue. The restaurant is still in its soft opening phase, but it is fully open for business every day except Sunday. Sunday brunch hours will be added in due time. It is owned by the same owner of my beloved Poke Hana (honestly one of my favorite restaurants in Orlando since 2018) and Korean fried chicken joint Chi-Kin, which I still haven’t been to yet.

I love Hawaiian food, and Poke Hana is a big reason for that, since I’ve never actually been to Hawaii. Even before that, there was a short-lived Hawaiian restaurant in Oviedo called Hawaiian Grindz that introduced me to most Hawaiian dishes. Unfortunately, it didn’t last very long, perhaps because the owners seemed to be very laid-back, to the point of not always opening when their posted hours said they would.

Anyway, Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner is a very professional setup with a busy, happy-looking staff, all in festive aloha shirts. It is a classic diner layout with booths along the window, tables, stools overlooking an open kitchen (separated by a plexiglass screen) and more stools at the bar. For my first visit earlier this evening, I sat at the bar and placed my takeout order with the very friendly and welcoming Olivia, the bartender.

While I waited for my takeout, I ordered a POG juice. I remember how popular Pogs were in the early ’90s, especially at the comic book shops I used to frequent, and how quickly the Pog fad came and went. But don’t worry — POG juice is passion fruit/orange/guava juice, and it is so sweet and tangy and tasty. It is surprisingly thick and heavy, as fruit juices can sometimes be, but I already love all tropical fruits, especially passion fruit and guava, so I enjoyed it and highly recommend it.

(That is the ever-patient Olivia’s arm back there.)

After that, I also tried the lychee lemonade, since I am now a lemonade connoisseur. It was also wonderful, and a lot lighter and more refreshing than the POG juice. I would definitely order that again.

I placed a large order, figuring my wife and I would get four total meals out of everything, and it was ready quite quickly.

My wife requested the shoyu poke bowl, with cubes of raw ahi tuna marinated in house shoyu (soy) sauce with Hawaiian salt, shelled edamame soybeans, macadamia nuts, chili flakes, sweet onions, and dried seaweed called ogo. These are all flavors she likes (except the onions, which she figured out after one harsh bite), so she was really happy with it. She said she liked this poke even more than Poke Hana, where we have eaten dozens of times, so that’s high praise coming from her.

I couldn’t decide between a few things, so I ordered an assortment, hoping to share, and if not, knowing I’d have leftovers for tomorrow. These were the kalbi ribs, beef ribs marinated in shoyu and fruit juices, sliced across the bones, and grilled. They had a lot of flavor from the grilling process and were so tender. I always love peeling the flat bone slices out of kalbi and enjoying the almost chewy meat around the edges of the bone. Even my wife liked the piece she had.

All “plate lunches” at Moa Kai come with two scoops of white rice and one scoop of macaroni salad, but you can also choose different sides, and some require a nominal upcharge. I already know I love Hawaiian-style macaroni salad, including from Poke Hana, so I was looking forward to this, but instead of white rice, I got garlic pan-fried noodles, hoping my wife would want to try them. We both loved them! As great as the kalbi and macaroni salad were (and they were), these garlic noodles were the truth. Whenever we return, we will split a full-size order of them.

Kai Asian Street Fare on the edge of Casselberry and Winter Park makes the closest thing in town to these garlic noodles, and theirs are also awesome, just a little more buttery-greasy. But I had a lousy phone camera back then, so forgive the ugly, blurry shots in that early review.

I got a second plate lunch, the mix plate, where you can select two house favorites. For one of my choices, I went with the spicy ahi poke with cubed, marinated ahi tuna, sweet onion, masago, and crushed macadamia nuts in house-made spicy sauce (think spicy mayo), topped with scallions. This was fire! Poke is one of my favorite foods, whether from Poke Hana, Rion’s Ocean Room, or even Costco, and I especially love spicy ahi or salmon poke like this. It was a small serving, but that’s what happens in a sampler platter like this. I could eat this by the bucketful.

The other thing I ended up with was the grilled shoyu chicken, which was a shoyu-marinated, grilled boneless chicken thigh, topped with teriyaki sauce and scallions. It was so tender and juicy and well-seasoned, and I always say chicken thighs are the best part of the chicken, aside from the oysters. Thick thighs save lives! (And if you were intrigued by the garlic noodles above, the full-size order comes topped with this shoyu chicken.)
The only reason I said I “ended up with” it was because I ordered the Korean chicken instead, which sounds like it would have been similar shoyu-marinated chicken, but cubed, battered, fried, and tossed in house-made Korean garlic sauce. I am not disappointed at all that I ended up with the grilled chicken instead. It was a slightly healthier option, and so damn delicious, I would happily order it again. I don’t own a grill, merely because it is so blasted hot and humid in Orlando nine months out of the year, I know I wouldn’t use it much. Knowing myself, that would lead to all kinds of cognitive dissonance and self-resentment, and I deal with that enough already without feeling guilty about buying a grill and not using it often enough. But I always miss the flavor of good grilled meats, and the grilled shoyu chicken thigh was a perfect piece of chicken. WE HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOYU!

I got macaroni salad with this plate lunch too, but instead of the white rice, I got Spam fried rice for an upcharge. Spam is so good, y’all! It is the very definition of a “sometimes food,” as heavily processed and salty as it is, but fried up with rice or noodles and wrapped in rice and seaweed as a Spam musubi, it is tastier than you would believe. The Spam lovers know what’s up, and the squeamish among you will just have to take my word for it. This Spam fried rice didn’t have anything else in it (no eggs or vegetables), but just Spam and fried rice were great by themselves.

But wait, there’s more! That old Hawaiian restaurant in Oviedo introduced me to saimin, a Hawaiian noodle soup similar to Japanese ramen, but with Spam. Saimin soup with Spam is on the menu here at Moa Kai, but we’re still in August, and I couldn’t conceive of ordering soup. But I still had to try some form of saimin, so I got the local style stir-fried saimin noodles with char siu (Chinese-style barbecue pork with a slight sweetness that you may know and love from Kai Kai or Tasty Wok), Spam, sliced kamaboko (cured surimi, similar to the fish cakes in ramen), scrambled eggs, carrots, and scallions, seasoned with shoyu and dashi, a Japanese cooking stock flavored with fish and kelp.
I’m going to enjoy this tomorrow, but I couldn’t resist a few bites while it was still fresh and hot, and it was on point. It reminded me of a Hawaiian version of lo mein (but better) or Filipino pancit bihon. The char siu pork was sweet and tender, and the Spam was sliced into tiny cubes and perfected by the stir-fry process. You could enjoy these local style stir-fried saimin any day of the week, not just on stir-Friday.

My wife had requested an açaí bowl for a bit of a dessert tonight and breakfast tomorrow. This was a huge helping of açaí sorbet blended and topped with fresh strawberries, blueberries, pineapple, and kiwi, shredded coconut, peanut butter, and granola. Knowing it was sorbet, I brought a cooler in the car with a couple of reusable fake-ice blocks to keep it cold on the drive home, but it still got a little melty. The tiny taste I had when she had enough for the night was soooo nice and refreshing, though.

I had never even heard of açaí until a few years ago, when everyone started touting its benefits as a healthy “superfood.” I can’t speak on that, but the dark purple sorbet made from the açaí berries is a nice blend of sweet and tart, especially when mixed with other, sweeter fruits.

And finally, we were both curious about the ube haupia pie, so I guess that makes us pie-curious. I couldn’t resist ordering a piece for us to share. Haupia is coconut pudding, a popular Hawaiian dessert made from coconut milk, sugar, cornstarch, and water, and it is surprisingly jiggly and bouncy like Jell-O. Poke Hana serves haupia in crispy fried spring rolls, which are terrific, but this was different. Moa Kai serves their haupia in pie form with a macadamia nut-graham cracker crust (superb) with a layer of creamy ube pudding in between. Ube is a purple yam with a vanilla-like flavor, common in Filipino and Vietnamese desserts and sweet drinks, and it is as tasty as it is beautiful. Someone call Yam Grier and send me to Yamsterdam, because these were some sweet-ass yams under that haupia, with more bounce to the ounce.

Folks, I am thrilled to report that Orlando has another winner. We first heard earlier this year that Moa Kai Hawaiian Diner was coming, and months passed with no updates. The menu surfaced online back in April, and it all sounded so good, I hoped plans wouldn’t change, since some announced restaurants never see the light of day. It was so worth the wait, and all the time and effort and money they put into it are paying off. You can see we tried many things so I could write a worthy review and share as much information as possible. Yeah, that’s the ticket. The diner setting is going to be a fun, welcoming atmosphere for dining in, and the location, right in our Mills 50 district with so many other fantastic restaurants nearby, will hopefully help keep them busy and garner them the success they deserve. I don’t know if I’ll ever make it to beautiful Hawaii, but at least we can all have a taste of it right here in Orlando. Whether you dine in or order takeout like I did tonight, look for Olivia, who might be behind the bar. She is awesome, and even in the brief time I waited for my takeout order at the bar, she made me feel like a valued customer, patiently answered any questions I had, asked if I needed anything, and represented the restaurant so well.

Howlin’ Ray’s (Los Angeles)

Howlin’ Ray’s (https://howlinrays.com/) is a beloved Los Angeles institution for Nashville-style hot chicken, which is one of my favorite styles of fried chicken. I got to try the iconic Hattie B’s Hot Chicken on my first and only trip to Nashville back in 2017, and I am a HUGE fan of Chicken Fire and JAM Hot Chicken, our two beloved Nashville hot joints back home in Orlando. I crave Chicken Fire a lot, but fried chicken and fries are the very definition of “sometimes foods,” so I rarely go.

I’ve been hearing raves about Howlin’ Ray’s ever since I started making these occasional work trips to L.A., and I swore I would try it on my most recent visit. From all accounts, it is one of those much-hyped places that actually lives up to all the hype. It started out as a food truck in 2015, founded by former fine dining chef Johnny Ray Zone (who sounds like a psychobilly musician or a cyberpunk protagonist) and his wife Amanda Chapman. A year later, they opened their first permanent location in Chinatown, which is the closest to my job, but not close enough to walk to. I figured it would be a good place to have delivered to work on my longest day, when I was staying late to teach part of a nighttime class. I don’t usually like getting food delivered, but it would be a lot more convenient than making it over to a place that doesn’t even have seating in my very limited time in the city.

I started out with a quarter chicken that was a leg and thigh, since I always prefer dark meat. I went with the hot flavor as a benchmark, to see how hot Howlin’ Ray’s hot actually is, and to also gauge how much I could take. It was delicious, tender, juicy chicken under that intense seasoning, fried to perfection. But holy moley, that seasoning! It definitely made my eyes water, nose run, lips tingle. It was hot, but tasty, and that’s the most important thing. I’m not a masochist — not totally, anyway — but as much as I love spicy food, I want flavor, not just pure pain. And this delivered plenty of delicious flavor!

At Hattie B’s, I ordered a medium thigh and a hot thigh to figure out a similar benchmark, and I have no regrets about either order. Like at Hattie B’s, Howlin’ Ray’s hid a slice of white bread underneath that quarter bird, and I was so glad to find it under there. Chewing it helped with the burning sensation.

I don’t go hotter than the hot level at any of these Nashville places, but I also wanted to scale back. And while they had chicken sandwiches that I’m sure are wonderful, I eat a lot of sandwiches, and I’ve even eaten sandwiches on this same L.A. trip. I wanted to try a few things from the menu, and Howlin’ Ray’s has a concoction called Mario Style that combined a few of them. This is a mountain of “shake fries” (crinkle-cut fries with spicy seasoning shaken over them), topped with chopped chicken breast at the flavor/heat level of your choice (I chose medium-plus, a half-step between medium and hot), vinegar slaw, pickles, creamy comeback sauce, and more of that shaken seasoning. I think there might have even been some cheddar cheese in there, but maybe not.
I figured I could eat this mess with a fork at my desk, but of course I dropped one piece of chicken that hit one of my favorite ties in three different places on its way down to also hit my crotch.

Here’s another pic showing you that there actually were fries underneath there. Mario Style was a huge portion of food, more than enough for a full meal. And assuming there was cheese in there, or if there was any dairy in the comeback sauce, then all four food groups are covered!

I can’t go to a restaurant that serves collard greens and not try them! These tender greens were braised with onions and also tomatoes, which is a new one for me. They were so good, I slurped the “pot likker” broth when I was done with the greens. And before I could check my teeth for rogue greens, two students chose that moment to come to my office to chat. (I checked after they left, and thankfully I didn’t have anything stuck in my teeth, but the timing really was impeccable.)

As I’ve said before, I also can’t go to a restaurant that serves macaroni salad or pasta salad and not try them! This cool and creamy macaroni salad included diced green bell peppers, piquillo peppers (an impressive touch), and a lot of fresh dill, which was interesting. I saved it for last to cool things down, even though it didn’t help with my burning lips.

This was all a huge treat. I loved it! The menu was very similar to Hattie B’s in Nashville, and I’d say Howlin’ Ray’s is on the same level, flavor-wise and overall quality-wise. I still have nothing but love in my heart for Orlando’s own Chicken Fire, and I appreciate a slight sweetness in the hot chicken from Chicken Fire, maybe due to a drizzle of honey. But my favorite thing about Howlin’ Ray’s compared to our beloved Orlando establishments is that they serve bone-in chicken, which Chicken Fire and JAM Hot Chicken do not do. That thigh and leg I had were straight fire — no pun intended — and totally worth the temporary pain. The chicken itself was fried to perfection, and people like my wife who don’t like spicy food would probably love their country style, which is even more mild than their mild. This is delicious food that I highly recommend to Angelenos and tourists alike, but I’m glad I ate it alone in my little office at my L.A. job site, so nobody else saw me tearing up and blowing my nose… except those two students who caught me mid-meal. They might have seen my tears of discomfort, but they were also tears of joy. I guess I am a little masochistic after all.