Category: Fried stuff

D’Amico & Sons Italian Market & Bakery

After a long wait (which probably felt much longer for the owners than people like me looking forward to the opening), D’Amico & Sons Italian Market & Bakery (https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093695793933) has officially soft-opened in the Oviedo Mall.  Sometimes I go to the Regal movie theater in that mall, and it desperately needs something else to keep bringing people in.  I am pleased to report that D’amico & Sons should flourish there, if the enthusiastic crowds on the second day of its soft opening continue.   Its hours are 7 AM to 7 PM, Monday through Saturday, and 7 AM to 3 PM on Sunday.

I am thrilled to have another Italian market in town, especially one that is much closer to me than my beloved Stasio’s and Tornatore’s.  It is a much larger space than either, having completely refurbished the old Chamberlin’s health food store, bright and clean and spacious, with plenty of natural light and ample parking.  There is even a covered patio with tables under an Italian flag awning, for those who want to enjoy coffee, gelato, pastries, and sandwiches on the premises.

Like any good Italian market, you can order a variety of coffee drinks.  I am happy to see any locally owned and operated coffee shops to combat the Starbucks stranglehold.

There is a gelato counter too, although it was too crowded today to get a photo of it.  It looked like they might have twelve or 16 different flavors, and I’m sure my wife and I will work our way through them eventually.  Of course I like ice cream (who doesn’t?), but I like gelato even better.  I prefer the texture, the intensity of the flavors (especially fruity flavors), and somehow, it is even healthier (or less unhealthy, if you will).

When I arrived around 12:30 on its second day open, there was a long line just to get up to the bakery counter.  I managed to snap this shot of  beautiful macarons and pastries in a glass case, but there were other cases to behold on each side of it, with cakes to the left and cookies to the right:

Here is another vertical refrigerated case full of gorgeous gelato cakes: chocolate raspberry, triple chocolate, and pistachio.

I ended up bringing home two lobster tail pastries that were so flaky and crispy — the top one filled with rich Bavarian cream, and the bottom one filled with cannoli cream and tiny chocolate chips.  Below that are two zeppoli, fried pastries dusted in powdered sugar.  Those were my wife’s favorites.  

They also sell these Italian wedding cookies and black and white cookies, which I highly recommend.  I have bought this brand of black and white cookies before (Bakery Boys of New York), but I brought home the Italian wedding cookies because she loves those, and she was really happy with them.  I don’t think they sold individual Italian wedding cookies at the cookie counter, but one would not have been enough!

There are plenty of savory foods to choose from too, including golden-brown arancini, rice balls coated in bread crumbs and lightly fried, for a texture that is crispy-crunchy on the outside and soft and yielding inside.  If you’ve ever had a papa rellena from a Cuban cafe or bakery, these are similar, but with rice instead of mashed potatoes inside.  There are original, cheese, and cheesesteak arancini to tempt you.  D’Amico & Sons definitely have a lot of balls.

I brought an original rice ball home for my wife.  The thing is the size of a baseball!

A butcher case of fresh sausages was tempting, but I passed on this first visit.  I’ll definitely be back to try some.

They also offer pizzelles, which are pizza-like flatbreads, sold by the slice (and possibly also whole).  They looked great, but I treated myself to a pizza yesterday and still have leftovers.

You can also get sandwiches made to order, and I took great care to get a legible photo of the hanging menu, since it is not listed on the Facebook page yet.  Right-click this image and open it in a new tab for a larger, more legible photo.   
I was really surprised they don’t offer a traditional Italian sub with salami, ham, and other deli meats, plus the typical provolone cheese, veggies, and a vinaigrette, so I ordered what seemed like the closest approximation: the Italian Cubano, with Boar’s Head prosciutto Riserva, porchetta, Swiss cheese, pepperoncini peppers, tomato, deli mustard, and Boar’s Head Pepperhouse Gourmaise (a really good mayo-based condiment) on a sub roll.  It was ready pretty quickly, despite how slammed they were at the deli counter.

This is the Italian Cubano sandwich, unwrapped back at home.  I would have preferred the pepperoncini peppers to be sliced or chopped rather than whole, but at least they removed the stems.  The bread, prosciutto, and Pepperhouse Gourmaise really made this sandwich, but it was a little light on ingredients, and the bread was not fully sliced all the way across, so the ends didn’t have any of the good stuff on them.  I didn’t get a taste of the porchetta by itself, but at least I saw it in there.  I wonder if they would consider getting a sandwich press for more of a traditional Cubano experience.

I would absolutely try other sandwiches from here, even if they’re not going to dethrone Stasio’s (and my favorite sandwich in the city, the namesake Stasio) anytime soon.

There is a separate counter next to the gelato for ordering fresh-baked bread, and I wisely bought two different loaves to bring home.  The sub roll was great, but this sesame seed-studded semolina loaf was even better — warm and fluffy inside, crackly crust outside, and so wonderful when spread with some of our room-temperature butter back at home.

I also bought a pull-apart olive batard, which didn’t have a crunchy, crackly outer crust, but was also warm and fluffy and full of salty, chewy, pungent black olives, baked in.  I’m not the biggest olive guy in the world, but I like them as olive salad on a muffuletta sandwich, and I liked them in this bread.  My wife really loved this one, and olive her.

Over by the pizzelles, there is a refrigerated case brimming with different Italian cheeses, including ricotta, fresh mozzarella, and even some delicious-looking smoked cheeses.  I abstained this time, but I’m glad to know they have all this variety.

And since I am infamous for documenting my love of sardines with my ‘Dines List reviews, I could not leave without a can for this Cuoco brand Seasoning for Macaroni with Sardines.  I’ve made the Sicilian dish pasta con le sarde before, with fresh fennel, but I look forward to trying this ready-made combination of sardines, oil, fennel, onions, raisins, and salt the next time I cook up some high-quality imported pasta.  Of course I will review it in a future installment of The ‘Dines List!  Good for Kaley Cuoco for choosing to diversify, selling sardine seasoning while still performing the animated voice of Harley Quinn.  Beauty, talent, and business savvy!

While D’Amico & Sons does not have a full-service Italian restaurant next door like Tornatore’s (probably my favorite Italian restaurant in Orlando), and while the sandwiches may not be Stasio’s quality just yet (definitely my favorite sandwiches in Orlando), Central Florida’s newest and most spacious Italian market, bakery, cafe, and deli is already off to a terrific start, and Seminole County residents are lucky to have it.  I know I am.  I strongly encourage all my regular readers to make a pilgrimage out here ASAP and consider getting Christmas and New Year’s Eve goodies for any entertaining you have planned.  Heck, Hanukah celebrators should find a lot to love here too!

Pigzza

Pigzza (https://pigzza.com/) is described as “An Italianish joint” on its website.  The creation of Thomas Ward, the chef-owner of Orlando’s beloved Pig Floyd’s Urban BBQ, Pigzza combines Ward’s love of barbecue with Italian food, specifically pizza and pasta, the same way Pig Floyd’s combines barbecue with Latin and Asian flavors.

I met one of my best foodie friends for dinner there in May, and we shared a lot of food, as we usually do whenever we have out.  We started with a beautiful order of oven-roasted chicken wings that were crispy but very juicy and tender, not greasy at all.   The plating elevated these even further, garnishing the wings with arugula, chewy craisins, and an artistic flourish of green goddess dressing.  Not many restaurants oven-roast their wings, but I always love these as an alternative to fried versions, which are more likely to get dried out.  Glancing at the menu on Pigzza’s website, it looks like these specific wings are not available anymore, but now you have a chance to get Calabrian chili and orange double-cooked wings instead, and that sounds pretty spectacular.

We also shared the Rhode Island-style calamari, crusted with cornmeal and tossed with garlic-herb butter, spicy pickled cherry peppers and banana peppers, and fried capers.  These were terrific too.  So chewy!  Such good breading!  I always appreciate cherry peppers on or in anything.  The calamari came with tangy red sauce and garlic aioli for dipping, and dip them I did, but they were so good that they didn’t even need the condiment.

For a pizza, we chose the CBW, topped with Alabama white barbecue sauce, barbecue chicken, bacon, smoked mozzarella, candied jalapenos, cilantro, and green onions.  Usually I’m a pizza purist who prefers red sauce to “white pies,” but since we got to taste Pigzza’s red sauce with the calamari, I was happy to try something different and unique.  And this isn’t any ordinary white pie, as you can tell.  These are 12″ pizzas, more Neapolitan-style than New York, and ideal for sharing between two people.The crust was very good, but I prefer the crispier crunch of New York- and Sicilian-style pizzas.  With this CBW, it was the combination of toppings that set it over the top.  Everything was fresh, high-quality, and combined so well together.

We also shared the spicy sausage tortiglioni pasta, which I learned is very similar to rigatoni.  The pasta was tossed in a vodka sauce, so it was tomatoey and creamy all at the same time, topped with grated Parmesan cheese and fresh oregano.  The sausage had a nice heat, and my only wish was that there could have been more of it in the dish.  I could have easily eaten it all myself, but I am always happy to share food with friends.

I returned to Pigzza in late July to meet two former co-workers, right after leaving my old job after 15 years.  We started with the Rhode Island calamari again, which was just as good this time (although my photography wasn’t).  My former supervisor went to school in Rhode Island, and this calamari earned her seal of approval too.

This was the pizza she ordered for herself, topped with pepperoni, Pigzza red sauce, smoked mozzarella (the smokiness makes such a huge difference), pecorino romano cheese, oregano, and marjoram.  We didn’t share each other’s pizzas, but she seemed very happy with it.

My other colleague, a vegetarian, got a pizza that I believe is called the Big Mo.  If this is it, then it was topped with roasted mushrooms, pink pickled onions, caramelized onions, and chives, along with vodka sauce and smoked mozzarella.  She was also really happy with her choice.  It wasn’t this blurry in real life, I swear!

And perhaps saving the best for last, this was my pizza, the Meat Me at Floyd’s, named for Pig Floyd’s just up the road.  It was topped with braised beef brisket, grape jelly barbecue sauce, smoked mozzarella and cheddar cheeses, pickled onions, green onions, and cilantro.  I loved this combination, even better than the CBW I shared on my previous visit.  But if I see brisket, pickled onions, and smoked cheese, I am going to be happy no matter what.

I’ve been sitting on this review for a while, half-written, hoping to visit Pigzza for a third time.  Working from home until late these days, it is much harder for me to get to the side of Orlando with all the great restaurants clustered together, plus parking is kind of abominable there unless you arrive super-early.  I will absolutely return, but I figured I should let everyone else know about it sooner rather than later, even though by now, probably — hopefully — everybody does.  It is a fine addition to the Mills 50 District and Orlando’s pizza scene, and Thomas Ward has done it again!

 

Z Asian Vietnamese Kitchen

Z Asian Vietnamese Kitchen (https://eatzasian.com/) is one of the nicer, more upscale Vietnamese restaurants in Orlando’s Mills 50 district full of Vietnamese and other Asian restaurants, markets, and shops.  That said, as someone who does not love high-end, fancy, luxurious dining, it is still very accessible and welcoming for all.  It is also unique because it received prestigious Michelin Bib Gourmand awards in 2022 and 2023.  To clarify, that does not mean it has a Michelin star, like some of the highest-end eateries, but rather it was recognized for its “good quality, good value cooking.”  Chef and co-owner Huong Nguyen focuses on street foods from Saigon, but her menu offers several dishes that Orlando’s other Vietnamese restaurants do not serve.

I first went to Z Asian with a former co-worker in late July.  She and I both left our workplace for new opportunities this year, so it was a chance to catch up and chat.  She is vegetarian, and Z Asian has so many vegetarian and vegan options on its menu, I thought it would be a perfect choice for dinner.

We started out with an order of two vegan summer rolls (goi cuon chay), with tofu, vermicelli noodles, and shredded lettuce rolled up in transparent, sticky, chewy rice paper and served at room temperature with a side order of peanut sauce.  My wife loves summer rolls with peanut sauce from other Vietnamese restaurants like Little Saigon and Pho 88, but they are usually not my favorites.  I’m not a big tofu guy either, but I’ll try anything once, and this was an excellent summer roll!  The tofu had the consistency of a firm omelet with a slightly crispy exterior, balancing against all the chewy ingredients. 

I also chose an order of pan-fried rice flour (bot chien), something I always see on Vietnamese menus but had never tried before.  It always looks good, and I thought my vegetarian friend would like it too.  It came served on a blanket of lovely fried eggs, although there is a vegan option too, without the eggs.  It was served with a side of crunchy, sweet pickled carrot and daikon radish, with a sweet chili soy dipping sauce.   This was AWESOME.  We both loved it.  This was another dish with a crispy exterior and soft, yielding interior, kind of like fries or tater tots — not in taste, but in “mouth feel.”  They were terrific with the sauce, and I liked the pickled vegetables (necessary ingredients on any banh mi sandwich) a lot.

My friend ordered stir-fried garlic noodles with tofu.  I didn’t try this, but she seemed to like it a lot.  In addition to the fried tofu (similar to the pieces in the summer rolls), it came with bok choy, carrot, and plenty of crunchy bean sprouts.

I ordered special rice noodle soup (hu tieu thap cam), with thinner rice noodles than you usually find in bowls of beefy pho.  Instead of being a beef-based soup like pho, this soup included pork, shrimp, squid, fish cakes, and krab sticks, in addition to aromatic herbs.  It was a nice, light soup and a pleasant change from the pho I’ve ordered so many times elsewhere.   Somehow, I managed not to splash my clothes, which was a minor miracle.My research tells me hu tieu is a Chinese-Cambodian invention that was adapted to Vietnamese tastes in the city of Saigon, and that I could have also ordered a “dry” version with a small bowl of soup on the side to protect my work clothes in the future.

Before leaving, I ordered the pan-fried rice cakes (minus the eggs) to bring home for my wife to try.  She was dazzled with them too, and they did not lose their subtle crispiness on the drive home. 

And I also brought home a dish I had really wanted to try, after seeing so many people post photos of it.  My vegetarian friend would not have been into this at all, but I knew my wife would share my appreciation of Z Asian’s grilled jumbo squid (muc nuong sate).  You can get squid at lots of restaurants (Italian, Greek, Chinese, steakhouses, and so forth) in the form of breaded, fried calamari, but I had never seen such squid served in such a beautiful presentation as this.  If your fellow diners aren’t averse to eating cephalopods (so that counts out my in-laws), this will be a real attention-grabber at your table, and I strongly recommend it.   
The menu says the grilled jumbo squid is marinated in “house sauce,” and it is served with house-made jalapeno green sauce, but it did not need to be dipped in anything.  Squid can sometimes get chewy and rubbery, but this was so tender and flavorful, with slight spicy and sweet flavors balancing out the taste of the ocean (but not a fishy taste).

It wasn’t long before I returned to Z Asian with my wife, who ordered a Thai milk tea (tra Thai) that was rich and cool and creamy and sweet, with a slightly smoky flavor. 

For some reason, I could not decide what to order.  Normally I am not intimidated by a large menu, but for this second visit, I just couldn’t choose.  I eventually picked something pretty random, the seafood stir-fried noodles in garlic sauce, which came with tail-on shrimp, squid, fish cakes, and the usual bok choy, carrots, and bean sprouts.  I chose egg noodles instead of rice noodles, but I had completely forgotten that this was essentially what my friend ordered on our first visit, minus the seafood. To be completely honest, this was okay.  I feel like I did not make the best choice.  I might have been happier with pho or bun bo hue, but I kept thinking about how hot it was for soup (on a scorching August afternoon in Florida), and how it would be hard to beat Pho Huong Lan, maker of the best pho and bun bo hue I’ve ever had anywhere.  Plus, with Z Asian’s huge menu, I wanted to challenge myself and step out of my comfort zone, trying something new instead of something familiar I’ve had dozens, if not hundreds, of times over the years.  But there wasn’t anything wrong with the dish; I blame myself for being uncharacteristically wishy-washy and not choosing wisely.  I was kind of hoping the garlic sauce on the noodles would be more like the awe-inspiring buttery garlic noodles at Kai Asian Street Fare, but not knowing any better, I just set myself up for disappointment.

As always, my wife was smarter than I, choosing a favorite from other Vietnamese restaurant menus: slices of tender grilled beef, tail-on shrimp, and a crispy fried spring roll cut in half, served over rice vermicelli noodles, with shredded lettuce, julienned cucumber and carrot, diced scallions, and crushed peanuts.  This was not a noodle soup, but a very refreshing, summery dish with warm and cool ingredients.  Sometimes you can’t go wrong with a classic!   

So that’s Z Asian Vietnamese Kitchen.  I would absolutely return and try something different next time — maybe something with clams or snails, or maybe even sample the bun bo hue or the pho.  But I really don’t think you can go wrong, and if you are a vegetarian or vegan, you have a lot more options here than most other restaurants in and around Orlando.  And if you don’t want to take my word for it, a certain tire company also really recommends the place.

Primrose Lanes

This may be the most predictable review I have written for The Saboscrivner food blog in a long time, probably because this particular restaurant is the talk of the town right now.  Orlando-based foodie social media has gone gaga (or gone to the dogs, if you will) discussing, debating, and deconstructing the $15 hot dog from Primrose Lanes (https://www.primroselanes.com/), the new restaurant and bar from former Luke’s Kitchen and Bar Executive Chef Jason Campbell.  I will say that if you haven’t heard about this hot dog, then congratulations — you haven’t been spending much time online, and that is laudable.  But if you are familiar with Orlando’s latest obsession, sometimes things that get a lot of hype have earned it and deserve it, and this fabulous, fantastic, first-class, fine freakin’ frankfurter definitely lives up to the hype, hoopla, hubbub, and hysteria.

But Primrose Lanes is not just some hot dog hut.  It used to be the bowling alley Colonial Lanes, founded in 1959.  It was sold and set to become yet another self-storage facility, and the owners even started ripping apart the bowling lanes.  Then the Team Market Group bought the building, refurbished the eight remaining lanes, and worked with Chef Campbell to create a dining and drinking destination far beyond what you would expect from “bowling alley food.”  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed the pastrami sandwich and house-made potato chips at Brooklyn South Bar at Aloma Bowl, but this is a legit gastropub — a true culinary experience that is far better than anything you’re envisioning.  It may not be the cheapest meal in Orlando (although plenty are way more expensive), but as someone who seeks out bargains and hates feeling ripped off, you will definitely get what you pay for at Primrose Lanes, and you’ll leave the restaurant feeling like you just bowled a perfect game.

On my first visit to Primrose Lanes, I went alone and sat on a high-top stool along a beautiful polished wood countertop.  I believe a lot of the wood in the restaurant was salvaged from the 24 original bowling lanes that had been destroyed.  The restaurant and bar area is a beautiful space, both modern and retro at the same time, with a big glass window overlooking the eight bowling lanes.

I started out with the “Funyun” fried onions, because I review onion rings wherever I find them on menus with a special notice longtime readers know as “RING THE ALARM!”  Of course I’m more about the concept of fried onions than the classic ring shape, so I am not a stickler for literal onion rings every time.  These fried onions were unlike any other fried onions I’ve ever had, with thin stems serving as handles to hoist the thick, rounded bulbs and dip them into creamy comeback sauce.  For a guy who eats a lot of chips and other salty snacks (and reviews them in my recurring Tight Chips features right here on this blog), I almost never eat Funyuns, those vaguely onion-flavored corn snacks, but they made a very interesting coating for these very real onions.  

The O.K.C. smashburger was a magnificent double-decker monster, extremely juicy despite the two patties being smashed flat on the flattop grill (hence the name).  I always liked thicc burgers (R.I.P. Fuddruckers) and bemoaned the smashburger trend, worried that everyone would be serving dried-out, overpriced hockey pucks.  But smashburgers like this one have won me over and give me hope for the future.

This O.K.C. smashburger was dressed with American cheese (still the best burger cheese), mayo, thin slices of delicious house-made pickles, and lots and lots of thin strands of fried onions, which really make a burger for me.  Dating back to the Great Depression, Oklahoma-style burger patties are pressed into super-thin strips or slices of onion, which then cook in the heat and the meat juices.  It was served on a brioche kaiser roll baked by the Olde Hearth Bread Company, which provides baked goods (no baked bads, ever) to many of the best restaurants in the Orlando area.  Even without ketchup, it was a winning burger through and through.

And what about this bougie $15 hot dog?  Well, like I said, it surpasses the hype, and anyone who has tried it will probably agree.  I rarely order hot dogs when I’m out on the town, because you can pay $7 or $8 for a pack of good-quality Sabretts or all-beef Boar’s Head dogs in the natural casing, so why would you pay that for a single hot dog?  But I’m glad I recently treated myself to the brilliant Detroit coney dog at SoDough Square, and I thought I had discovered the best hot dog in Orlando then.  It is great, no doubt about it, but Chef Campbell’s hot dog is a triumphant treasure in every possible way.

It is house-made, and I don’t know who else around here goes to the significant effort of making their own hot dogs.  It has such a fantastic snap, the way the best hot dogs and sausages do, and I had to close my eyes to savor every bite.  In a recent article by Orlando Sentinel food writer (and mah friend) Amy Drew Thompson, Chef Campbell said the hot dogs are made with “Certified Angus. Ribeye, short rib, brisket and chuck in a lamb casing,” and then smoked.  That lamb casing is what gives it the satisfying snap, and if you don’t know what I’m talking about, then you need to treat yourself to a higher standard of hot dogs, my dudes.  The tangy, zingy relish is house-made too, but I don’t know if the buttery grilled bun is from Olde Hearth Bread Company or baked in-house.  The pickle spears next to the burger and the hot dog were delicious too, much to nobody’s surprise.  I have no doubt they were also made in-house by Chef Campbell and his team.

Oh yeah, I had heard you could get it topped with smoked trout caviar for an extra $5, and I said “Yes, let’s do that thing.”  It added an extra level of decadence to the best hot dog ever (to say nothing of additional salt and smokiness), and I have no regrets.  Hey, I’m eating at home more than ever now that I have a remote job, and this was my first trip out of the house in several days, so I felt like living large!  WHAT?

Anyway, when I picked up my wife a little later after enjoying that epic meal, she was really hungry and wanted to go to one of her favorite spots for chicken tenders.  I was raving about the meal I had enjoyed earlier, and I told her Primrose Lanes had chicken tenders too, as well as a Shirley Temple made with house-made grenadine syrup.  I thought for sure she would say “Let’s try it some other time,” but instead she said “That sounds really great, and we’re close, and I’m hungry.  Would you mind going back the same day?”  And I said “Hell yeah, girl,” and back I went, fewer than two hours later!

She loves Shirley Temples, so she ordered that, and I ordered a lemonade that was nice and cold and tart and refreshing, and not too sweet.  She said her Shirley wasn’t as sweet as most, which probably use all kinds of artificially flavored grenadine syrups, possibly bolstered with high fructose corn syrup.  She said it was almost “savory,” but I tried a sip and can tell you it wasn’t necessarily savory, but definitely not cloyingly candy-sweet like most.  It was also garnished with a dark cherry that definitely wasn’t a bright red maraschino, but maybe an amarena or Luxardo cherry.  

She ordered the chicken tendies [sp], which came out darker than either of us expected.  I asked if they were burned, and our lovely, patient server Claire, who took care of me on both back to back visits, said they all look like that.  The tendies (I still can’t get used to that) came with a ranch dip seasoned with dill and “sha’bang sauce” that was thick and spicy — not exactly buffalo or sriracha, but they could have been involved — with tiny bits of sliced orange in it.

We also shared hash brown bites, perfect potato cubes that were crispy on the outside and soft and yielding inside, dressed with garlic crema and topped with more of that smoked trout caviar.  These would be a terrific appetizer to order with any meal, unless you are a vegetarian, and then they could easily hold the trout roe for you.  They reminded me of LEGO blocks, the way they were stacked so nicely.

One of the biggest hits of my wife’s first visit to Primrose Lanes and my second was the tuna tartare (her choice), a refreshing portion of diced raw tuna with avocado, spicy mayo, lightly pickled cucumber slices (so good!), sprinkled with regular and black sesame seeds and accompanied by what had to be fried Saltine crackers.

This dish knocked my wife’s socks off.  Every ingredient, every taste, every texture worked in perfect harmony.  It was my favorite part of my second visit, after all the heavy stuff I ate not that much earlier in the day.  It was so cool and creamy and crispy and piquant, especially since I love spicy tuna rolls and poke bowls so much.  She was in love with the fried Saltines, which had some kind of mysterious seasoning on them too, and I couldn’t believe nobody else had ever done that before.

And because my wife loves soft serve ice cream, she ordered vanilla soft serve for dessert (because they were out of chocolate) and got it topped with fudge sauce.  While I thought the smashburger, the hot dog, and the tuna tartare could not be beat, this was her overall favorite.  She looked pensive after the first bite, engrossed in thought, consumed as she consumed it.  Her eyes rolled back in her head.  She said she had never had soft serve ice cream this good; nothing else had ever come close.  She used the word “orgasmic.”  Ladies and gentlemen, you heard it here first.

I could usually do without soft serve ice cream — it tends to be kind of bland and tasteless for me, and rarely tastes like vanilla so much as some kind of plain whiteness.  But upon her urging, I tried it, and it was as inspired as the rest of the food on this menu, so far above and beyond what most people might expect, so much better than it even needed to be.

This is the exact kind of restaurant I love to review on my blog.  There are countless restaurants where you can get a decent-to-good meal, and if you pay enough money, you’re bound to get something above-average.  But I especially love finding good or great food where you don’t expect it, whether it’s a nondescript food truck or trailer or a restaurant inside a place where you wouldn’t go looking for one, and especially wouldn’t dream of finding a good one.  I’d say an excellent restaurant in a bowling alley counts for that, even though Primrose Lanes is more of a restaurant and bar with eight really cool bowling lanes than a bowling alley with that serves food.

I don’t mind admitting that I’m a pretty rotten bowler.  Because I suck so much, I don’t particularly enjoy bowling, so I don’t do it, and that means I never improve.  But if you ever go out for a trivia night with me, you will see me kick all kinds of ass and be impressed, then maybe a little scared, then annoyed, then bored, and then probably round the corner to impressed all over again.  And if you ever join me for karaoke, you will find that I am not a particularly good singer, but I will do my damn best and cheer like crazy for my friends who are doing their damn best along with me.  Unfortunately, I have yet to find ridiculously elevated food like this at any local trivia or karaoke spots, nor do I have many friends who are ever up for that kind of thing.

The good news about Primrose Lanes is that you don’t have to bowl at all.  Plenty of people go just for the food, and you can too.  But if you like to eat and bowl, then my stalwart Saboscrivnerinos, this needs to be your next night out with the ladies or the fellas, or your next hot date.  Everyone will love it.  But if you’re trying to corral 15 or 20 small kids for a bowling birthday party, I would advise against schlepping the little dudes to Primrose Lanes.  Children are certainly welcome, but I’d say it is more of a place for adults to have fun.  And as a non-kid-haver who ate there twice in one day, adults will likely have more fun there without kids… unless your kids are really cool.

King Cajun Crawfish

It has been over five years since I’ve eaten at King Cajun Crawfish (https://kingcajuncrawfish.com/), the Vietnamese-Cajun restaurant in Orlando’s Mills 50 district, one of our best and most diverse neighborhoods for dining.  I have always loved it, being a fan of New Orleans and its culture and culinary traditions, so I don’t know what took me so long to return.  At least I’ve been there more recently than I’ve been back to the Big Easy itself (not since 2001, sadly).

You may already be familiar with the Cajun and Creole dishes of Louisiana, but I will be didactic and point out that Cajun food is rustic and rural, a spicy stewpot of French-Acadians who left Nova Scotia and settled in the bayous of Louisiana along with Southern influences, while Creole food is more continental “city food” from New Orleans, influenced by Caribbean and European flavors, especially French.

Vietnamese-Cajun is a unique offshoot — a fusion of a fusion — and we are lucky to have several Viet-Cajun restaurants here in Orlando.  I believe King Cajun was the first, so it has always been my favorite.   Food & Wine offers a nice history of the fusion cuisine, which started with Vietnamese refugees who worked in the seafood industry in Gulf Coast Texas and Louisiana.

I recently invited a beloved professional mentor and friend out to lunch, something we’ve been meaning to do for almost 15 years but never gotten around to.  She is a sophisticated and brilliant woman who hails from New Orleans, so I figured King Cajun would be a good choice.  I see it as pretty authentic, but I was glad she said the same, without any prompting.

King Cajun Crawfish specializes in seafood boils, messy pots of excess featuring crawfish, shrimp, and crab in savory, spicy broths with potatoes, corn, and Andouille sausage.  However, those are so messy, you really have to dress down for a meal like that, or you’ll ruin your clothes.  Just an FYI: a meal like that might not be the best choice for a date, unless you’re planning to disrobe later, in case it could end up being an inspired choice.  My colleague and I played it safer, selecting with other menu items less likely to splatter, splash, and stain, but for future reference, those seafood boils are delicious, especially if you go with the house specialty “ShaBang sauce” (a blend of their traditional, lemon pepper, garlic butter, and “Rajun’ Cajun” seasonings).

My mentor started out with hush puppies, seasoned dough balls fried to crispy, golden perfection, yet savory and soft inside.  These were terrific dipped into some thick, tangy remoulade sauce, and the leftovers heated up perfectly in my toaster oven later that night.

She also ordered a cup of jambalaya, which is a rice dish in a thick, tomatoey sauce with Andouille sausage, chicken, shrimp, onion, and celery.  We both liked the little we tried, and I brought the rest home for my wife, who overcame her skepticism and absolutely loved it.

I got seafood gumbo for us to share, which my wife and I both always enjoyed at King Cajun in the past, and this was no exception.  My mentor and I requested it at medium heat, because there was hot sauce on the table to punch it up if it was too mild.  I could have taken it hotter and been fine, but it was great as is, with plenty of plump shrimp, sausage, chicken, rice, okra, and the “trinity” of Cajun and Creole cooking: onion, celery, and green bell peppers, all cooked in a flavorful roux (stirring flour into butter or some other fat to thicken sauces).  Needless to say, we did not roux this day!  Gumbo is more like a soup or stew than jambalaya, just in case you have confused them in the past.  Both have similar ingredients, but gumbo always has more of a broth, with white rice on the bottom of the cup or bowl.

The hot, fresh French bread at King Cajun is awesome — perfectly crusty on the outside and fluffy, soft, and warm inside.  A small loaf, more than enough for two people to share, is only $2.  You must get it, whether you order the seafood boil or something else saucy, like gumbo, jambalaya, or crawfish étouffée (for next time).  The po’boy sandwiches come on the same bread, but when you order the loaf, it is scored to pull apart easily.

This was the fried oyster platter (my choice), which I thought was only supposed to come with six fried oysters, but it came with far more than six.  They were also fried perfectly in a cornmeal batter.  I think I prefer raw or charbroiled oysters most of the time, but these were delightful.  You can also get them in a po’boy sandwich, but we already had French bread, and I felt like getting some sides.All the fried platters come with two sides.  I chose potato salad and onion rings, so long-time Saboscrivner readers know this is also a RING THE ALARM! feature.  The potato salad was cool and refreshing, tangy with a little yellow mustard the way Southern potato salads often are.  The onion rings were breaded rather than battered, but they didn’t have those jagged crags that cut up the inside of your mouth, and the onions inside were at a reasonable temperature, not molten and scalding.  I dipped the oysters and onion rings in the included cocktail sauce, but the remoulade (not pictured) was the best dipping sauce for both.

A side of cole slaw was crispy, cool, creamy, and refreshing, but not too heavy with mayo.  Like the potato salad, it was nice to cut all the richness of the fried stuff we had been eating.

And for dessert, you can’t leave New Orleans or King Cajun Crawfish without an order of beignets (pronounced “bin-YAYS”), puffy triangles of fried dough covered with so much powdered sugar, it looks like they just left a bachelor party in Miami… or let’s face it, any party in Miami.
King Cajun Crawfish serves Café du Monde coffee, a New Orleans classic that is an ideal combination with these beignets (especially with condensed milk added), but we both passed.  I’m not a coffee drinker, and even I’ll tell you that is some damn fine coffee with its flavoring from the chicory root.  Then again, condensed milk makes everything better, and now I’m thinking about requesting some to drizzle over the beignets or dip them in it next time.

This was a long overdue lunch with one of the best people I know, and we could not have picked a better restaurant.  It made me happy she liked it and considered it authentic (better than Tibby’s, she said!), and I wondered how and why it had been so long since my last visit to King Cajun Crawfish.  Next time I return, I will have to go with a group and dress down to enjoy some boiled crawfish and shrimp in ShaBang sauce without ruining my work clothes.  I don’t think that’s too shellfish of a request.

CLOSED: Zorba’s Greek Restaurant

EDITOR’S NOTE: I was saddened to learn that Zorba’s Greek Restaurant permanently closed in August 2024.  Apparently the owners retired, so good for them, after so many years in a hard business.  But Zorba’s really was my favorite Greek restaurant in the Orlando area, and I will miss it terribly.

***

Zorba’s Greek Restaurant (https://zorbasgreekfood.com/) is located at 115 East 1st Street, in the quaint, picturesque, historic section of Sanford, about half an hour north of downtown Orlando.  1st Street is lined with great restaurants (including the beloved Hollerbach’s German Restaurant, Christo’s diner, and the nearby St. Johns River Steak & Seafood), bars, breweries, and cute shops.  There is an excellent ice cream parlor (Wondermade, one of my two favorites in Central Florida) and a very cool new food hall, Henry’s Depot, which I recently visited for the first time and will definitely write about in the future.  There is a German grocery store (Magnolia Square Market, owned by the Hollerbach family), a shop that specializes in hot sauces and everything spicy (Spice is Nice, which I also plan to review), and a farmer’s market every Saturday.  It’s one of the most underrated foodie areas around, so I am thrilled to review another restaurant in the neighborhood that quickly became one of my new favorites.  In fact, after two visits, one for dining in and one for takeout, I might go out on a limb and call Zorba’s my favorite Greek restaurant in the Greater Orlando area.

Funny enough, my wife and I ended up there completely accidentally, after first driving to Sanford intending to go to Hollerbach’s on a day it turned out to be closed.  We had been passing Zorba’s for years, and since it is mere steps away, we went there instead, and were so glad we did.  We were hungry, so we did our usual over-ordering thing, knowing we would have plenty of delicious leftovers to last us for days, which would heat up well at home.

We started out with eggplant garlic spread, which came with warm,  soft, lightly grilled pita bread wedges for dipping and/or spreading.  I am relieved to report the pita bread was really good, because I hate the Toufayan brand of pita they sell at Publix, near the deli section. 

The eggplant garlic spread was savory and creamy, as the menu promised.  It was my wife’s idea to order it, but I think it was so garlicky, I ended up liking it more than she did.  But it was really awesome, and I would definitely recommend it as a nice starter.

She chose the octopus from the list of mezethakia, or Greek appetizers, to be her main course.  We all have our favorite dishes we can never turn down when we see them on menus, and octopus is one of hers.  You never know quite how restaurants are going to serve it, but Zorba’s served one large, marinated, char-grilled tentacle with tomatoes, kalamata olives, lemon, and some of the best feta cheese either of us have ever had.  I’ve had so much rubbery, chewy octopus that I don’t seek it out anymore the way she does, but she insisted I try it, and it was outstanding — easily some of the best I’ve ever tried anywhere.  Really meaty and flavorful, possibly from being tenderized by an acidic marinade that includes vinegar.  

Since my wife doesn’t cook, I suggested she order something else that she could eat over the next day or two, once I was back at work.  She chose papootsakia, which is really fun to say.  The menu describes it as half an eggplant stuffed with seasoned ground beef topped with creamy Bechamel sauce and baked, but as you can see, it looks like they served her a double portion!  This was another banger.  We both tasted cinnamon in the ground beef, and I suspected they use the same recipe for the moussaka (casserole with ground beef, eggplant, potatoes, and Bechamel) and some other dishes.  My wife named this one of the best things she has ever eaten in her life, and she doesn’t toss around superlatives as freely as your friendly neighborhood Saboscrivner!Needless to say, the papootsakia (hehe) lasted her a few days, and like so many saucy, savory dishes, it kept tasting better and better after every day in the fridge.

Just like octopus and eggplant are two of my wife’s “trigger dishes” that she always feels compelled to try anywhere, slow-braised and stewed meats in sauces are one of mine.  I noticed Zorba’s offered a lamb shank and a pork shank, both braised and baked in a tomato sauce.  I had a hard time deciding between the two, but our patient server suggested I try the lamb shank for my first visit, and so I did.  This really is one of my favorite meals, period.  I loved the braised lamb shanks at Cappadocia Turkish Cuisine (and listed them as one of my Top Five favorite things I ate in 2018 in Orlando Weekly), and now I’m pretty great at making them myself, using this recipe.   Well, I’m happy to say that the lamb shank from Zorba’s is as good as any of the other versions I’ve tried or made, if not better.  The tomato sauce is so rich, it really puts it over the top.  The meat was fork-tender and so savory and flavorful.The rice pilaf was already soft and buttery, but I mixed all the tomato sauce I could into it, making it even better.

As if that wasn’t enough food, I ordered one of my favorite Greek dishes, pastitsio, which is kind of like Greek baked ziti or lasagna — a baked casserole with layers of seasoned ground beef (with more of that cinnamon) and long, uncut ziti noodles tossed in beaten egg whites and feta cheese after boiling to help the noodles stick together, topped with more creamy Bechamel that browns when baked.  It is a delicious, hearty dish that is different enough from the Italian versions that you absolutely have to try it, if you never have had it before.  And the pastitsio at Zorba’s is absolutely the best version I’ve ever had.  They knocked it out of the park.

It’s so pleasing to the eye too, when the chef gets all the ziti noodles facing the same way, so it creates that honeycomb-like pattern when slices are cut out of it.

All the entrees came with a choice of a lovely Greek salad tossed in a housemade viniagrette dressing with more of that terrific feta (so much better than the kind I’ve been buying at Aldi), or a soup.  The salad turned out to be a much more refreshing choice.

The soup was avgolemono, a hearty Greek chicken soup with orzo pasta and lemon.  We wanted to try both the salad and the soup, but it’s just too blasted hot to enjoy most soups, here in the hottest summer recorded in human history.

The entrees all come with fresh-baked rolls studded with sesame seeds.  It seems like an unnecessary inclusion, but these are really damn good rolls, especially when you have such delicious sauces and juices to mop up.  Don’t leave them behind!

And my wife said we couldn’t leave without trying the baklava for dessert, so who was I to argue?  It was good baklava, although I have never had bad baklava.

Here’s a look at it with the thin, crispy phyllo dough “roof” removed:

On my second visit to Zorba’s, this past weekend, I brought home the lamb chop lollipops for my wife.  I asked for them rare, but they came out closer to medium.  These are a lot thinner than the thick lamb loin chops I buy at Costco for roasting, so it was probably harder to rescue these while they were still rare.  These were served over more rice pilaf and dressed salad greens.

Since I liked the lamb shank so much last time, this time I ordered the pork shank, which was an even bigger hunk of meat with the bones still in.  Like the lamb shank, it was baked to fork-tender perfection in the same rich tomato sauce, over more rice pilaf.  I didn’t even eat this until the day after I brought everything home, but I suspect it got even tastier in the fridge overnight.   No matter which shank you choose, you can’t go wrong.   Zorba’s prepared both perfectly.   

I could not help ordering a regular gyro for us to share, just to see how Zorba’s stacks up to other gyros around Orlando.  It was really good, with the garlicky, salty lamb slices still tender (some places throw them on the grill after carving them off the spit, drying them out), nice, thick, creamy, garlicky tzatziki sauce, and a properly grilled pita.  If you’re in the mood for a gyro in Sanford, you absolutely can’t go wrong.  BUT — and this is not a complaint about the quality at all — nobody in the Orlando area makes a better gyro than Mediterranean Deli on Fairbanks Avenue.  If they do, I haven’t found it yet.

So that’s Zorba’s Greek Restaurant.  If Sanford wasn’t such a schlep from home, we would become regulars for sure.  As it is, I’ll still make the trek to bring it home when we’re in the mood, because it is that damn good.  You can tell everything is homemade, fresh, and authentic.  The service was great when we dined in, and it’s a nice little spot that would be fine for  casual family dining, but nice enough to bring a date.  There are so many great dining options in Sanford these days, but this is one that may not be as new or exciting or “sexy” as some of the other restaurants along 1st Street.  Don’t sleep on it, though.  It was one of our favorite discoveries of 2023, and it will probably become one of yours too.

Tight Chips: Over Two Years of Potato Chips

In this new installment of Tight Chips, I will review some of the new flavors of potato chips I’ve enjoyed and discovered over the past two years, since my last chip review roundup.  I pride myself on sticking to a budget and keeping my impulse buys and “retail therapy” in check, but one way to sucker me out of a few bucks is to come out with new and weird flavors of potato chips.  I always feel obligated to try them, especially five years into this food blog, under the flimsy excuse of “JOURNALISM!” and even “SCIENCE!”  I used to be like that with sodas too (especially as a non-drinker), but at least I’ve managed to cut back on those.

But it’s almost July 4th, a time when we celebrate our country’s independence (while hopefully realizing we still have a long way to go to improve things here) and get together with family and friends for cookouts and dangerous explosions, often eating lots of chips.  Perhaps this blog entry can serve as a guide for those of you who offer your guests salty, crunchy snacks in between grilling out, drinking heavily, and blowing things up.

I’m going to start with some of my favorite potato chips I’ve ever tried: Zapp’s, out of Gramercy, Louisiana.  Zapp’s specializes in thick, crunchy kettle-fried chips with strong, bold flavors.  You can usually find them at Wawa, 7-Eleven, Publix, and Winn-Dixie stores, at least here in Orlando.

Zapp’s most popular flavors may be Voodoo and Voodoo Heat, which combine salty, savory, sweet, smoky, and tangy flavors, similar to the Canadian-inspired all-dressed chips I have reviewed before.  I give the slight edge to Voodoo Heat, which, as you might guess, is spicier than the delicious but mild Voodoo flavor.

If you like it spicy, but also tangy and sweet, these are awesome.

I must admit preferring the thinner, crispier, Lay’s-style potato chip to Zapp’s crunchier, thicker chips, but Zapp’s has recently started offering its own “Thinz,” which are more like Lay’s, texture-wise, but with the superior Zapp’s flavors.  Winn-Dixie carries larger bags of Zapp’s Thinz.

The Voodoo Thinz taste just as good as the thicker kettle chips:

Zapp’s Bourbon Street Smoky Sweet is kind of like a sweet barbecue flavor minus the tanginess of tomato, and they are also really good.  I’ve only seen the Thinz version sold around here:

But you can’t go wrong:

Zapp’s Evil Eye is more of a tomato-forward flavor that I like, but not as much as the Voodoo:

But they don’t skimp on the seasoning:

Finally, Zapp’s Cajun Dill Gator-Tators are kind of like a mildly spicy dill pickle flavor, but not overly spicy, so don’t worry.  They don’t taste like alligator at all, so don’t worry about that either.

They are one of the better pickle-flavored chips out there, but I will be covering a few more here.

The Voodoo flavor is such a breakthrough hit, other companies have similar versions.  Southeastern Grocers, the parent company of Winn-Dixie, has a surprisingly excellent New Orleans Blend potato chip flavor that is thin and crispy like Lay’s and Zapp’s Thinz, and large bags are ridiculously cheap compared to the name brands.  They also go hard on the seasoning and are excellent quality. 

These are better than they have any right to be:

I only ever see the Dirty brand of potato chips in small bags near the Publix deli (not in the chip aisle).  These are thicker kettle chips.  My wife likes the plain ones from time to time (she doesn’t share my fascination with flavored chips), but one day I tried the Funky Fusion, and it is essentially the Dirty version of Zapp’s Voodoo flavor.  Not nearly as good, though.

Not bad, but they’re no Zapp’s.

All this talk about July 4th cookouts and then the flavors of New Orleans might put someone in the mood for an icy cold, refreshing beer.  If you want one, enjoy it responsibly, but I can caution you against bothering with Clancy’s Beer-flavored potato chips, which are occasionally available at Aldi supermarkets.  Clancy’s is Aldi’s private label for chips and other salty snacks like pork rinds.  Some are great (including Moscow Mule- and Bloody Mary-flavored chips I have reviewed before), but this wasn’t one of the great ones. 

They were mostly bland, vaguely earthy-tasting, and incredibly salty, even by potato chip standards.  I wouldn’t get them again.

I mentioned Clancy’s Bloody Mary and Moscow Mule-flavored chips, which I enjoyed in the past, but the smoked Kentucky bourbon flavor was another miss from this Aldi store brand.

They tasted a little smoky, but not in a good way, like smoked meat or barbecue sauce.  Mostly they just tasted overwhelmingly salty.  I used to enjoy Maker’s Mark bourbon, and there is no substitute for the real thing.

To close out the Aldi chip discussion but tie it back to the cookout theme, Clancy’s also came out with a grilled ribeye steak flavor, which I didn’t love either. 

These had a subtle “burned on the grill” taste with more overwhelming saltiness and also a peppery flavor, but they sure didn’t taste like steak or any other meat.  I think I just don’t care for the “Krinkle Cut” style of ridged chips that much, at least not from the Clancy’s brand.  They always taste much saltier to me.

I bet you didn’t realize how classy potato chip flavors have become.  Barbecue and beer are one thing, but bourbon and ribeye steak are new.  Going beyond that, a Spanish company called Torres makes really upscale chips, including a sparkling wine flavor I recently found at Publix, and another snack company I love, Herr Foods, Inc., out of Nottingham, Pennsylvania, came out with Herr’s charcuterie board-flavored potato chips earlier this year!  Forget cookouts, these are the perfect chips for a really fancy soiree or a date!

It’s uncanny how much the Torres chips actually tasted like sparkling wine — sweet, acidic, fruity, sour.  It isn’t the most satisfying flavor combination overall, but they are definitely worth a try for those who share my fascination with novelty and weirdness.

And as my longtime readers know, I am a pretty serious aficionado of cured meats.  I love that the Lunchables generation has turned charcuterie boards into a thing, but I would rather have my salami, prosciutto, soppressata, capicola, and other delicious deli meats on a sub or hoagie, topped with cheese, vegetables, and condiments, rather than arranged beautifully on a wooden board.  But when you don’t have access to either, you probably want to try these new Herr’s chips.  They definitely have a delicate, salty, porky flavor, but didn’t taste like any specific cured meat that I could pick out.  I should note that I’ve only ever found this Herr’s flavor at Deli Desires, which is one of Orlando’s more underrated spots.These chips did not include any meat in the ingredients, so you’re welcome, vegetarians!

I love Herr’s chips, and being a Pennsylvania-based company, you can always find them at Wawa convenience stores, another Pennsylvania company.  My most recent chip finds are these three “Flavors of Philly” Herr’s chips: tomato pie, roast pork sandwich, and Korean BBQ wings.  

I tried the tomato pie chips first, inspired by Corropolese Italian Bakery & Deli in Philadelphia.  Tomato pie is similar to Sicilian pizza, but the thick, rectangular slices have a sweet tomato sauce and are topped with Romano cheese, but no mozzarella.  The closest I’ve found to it in Orlando is the tomato pie at Tornatore’s, which is more of an upstate New York version, but the scachatta at Alessi Bakery and La Segunda Bakery in Tampa is similar to tomato pie, sweet sauce and all, only they have finely ground beef in their sauces.  These chips tasted like sweet tomato sauce with a dash of pungent cheese, so they nailed it as best they could.

The roast pork sandwich chips are specifically inspired by John’s Roast Pork, a Philadelphia legend I haven’t had a chance to try, although I did have two pretty amazing roast pork sandwiches when I was there last month.  Be on the lookout for that review coming soon.  Anyway, these chips were a lot more subtle, with garlic emerging as the main flavor (aside from salt).  It’s a delicious sandwich when made well, especially when topped with sharp provolone and bitter broccoli rabe, but much more subtle than an Italian hoagie or a cheesesteak.

What I wasn’t expecting was that Herr’s Korean BBQ wings flavor, inspired by Mike’s BBQ restaurant in Philly, would be the best-tasting chips in this new trio.  But I should have guessed, because Korean-style chicken wings kick ass, whether you order them from Hawkers, Domu, Kai Asian Street Fare, or bb.q Chicken.

And Herr’s just keeps on barreling forward with wild flavors.  I admit I didn’t think much of these Loaded Tots chips, but it was an ambitious experiment:

There were some interesting flavors present, but I know I couldn’t pick out bacon and cheese and sour cream and chives!

Earlier this year, Herr’s sold new Sandwi-Chips with four “extra bold” flavors, exclusive to Wawa stores, marketed to be put into sandwiches.  That’s something I’m going to do if I have a sandwich and chips together anyway, so I took it upon myself to sample all the new flavors, inspired by condiments and sandwich toppings.

Everyone knows I love mustard, to the point where I write a recurring mustard review feature called Cutting the Mustard, so I tried the Herr’s mustard Sandwi-Chips first.

Needless to say, these tasted bright and tangy and acidic, just like yellow mustard.  If you’re making a ham, turkey, or roast beef sandwich or a burger, go to town with these.  You won’t regret it.

The sweet onion Sandwi-Chips were almost too strongly oniony, compared to a more mellowed-out sour cream and onion flavor.

They were kind of a lot, as my students used to say.

Next up, I had to try the ketchup Sandwi-Chips, because I have always really liked Herr’s regular ketchup chips.  That is a popular Canadian chip flavor, but not nearly as popular in the U.S.  I’ve never been to Canada, but always wanted to, as I have a fondness for its culture and people, with their reputations for being polite.  In fact, several people have thought I, your friendly neighborhood Saboscrivner, am Canadian, between my voice (your guess is as good as mine) and my unfailing politeness.  I’ll take it as a compliment, eh?

Anyway, to make this a truly scientific experiment (well, not really), I had to compare and contrast Herr’s original ketchup chips, which I’ve had several times, with the new Sandwi-Chips.

They tasted very similar, and I’m honestly not even sure if I mixed up the photos or not.  I’ve always appreciated that the regular ketchup chips are heavily seasoned, and they will definitely turn your fingertips RED.  They are tomatoey, tangy, and sweet, and I like them a lot.  Always have, always will.

I think the only difference I noticed was that the “extra bold” ketchup chips might have had even more seasoning on them, but I couldn’t discern any unique taste.  But I liked both!

Finally (at least for these), Herr’s came out with a spicy pickle flavor of Sandwi-Chips, and they tasted very pickley, as one would expect and hope, but somewhat light on the spice.

They were fine.  They would go particularly well on any sandwich or burger where you would normally add pickles, or even if you actually did add pickles.

As long as we’re talking about pickle-flavored chips, I should note that I used to hate pickles, until I embarked on a mission to learn to appreciate pickles by comparing, contrasting, and reviewing a bunch of different pickles.

The pickles that made me a fan were Grillo’s pickles, which I waxed rhapsodic about in that above review, “A Plethora of Pickles.”  The Utz Quality Foods company, another snack company with Pennsylvania roots (Hanover, this time), actually created Grillo’s pickle chips, which a good friend shared with me after buying a ginormous bag at Costco.

These are maybe the best pickle chips I’ve ever tried, and I was grateful to not have to buy the whole pillowcase-sized bag of them.

I can’t say I’m the biggest fan of Frito-Lay’s extremely popular Flamin’ Hot flavor, regardless of its heartwarming and/or apocryphal origin story.  What exactly does it taste like?  HOT.  It tastes like hot, and there might be a bit of lime, but maybe that’s all in my head.  All the Flamin’ Hot chips (Cheetos, Ruffles, Lay’s, etc.) are fiery, angry red, and sometimes after the fact, other things are fiery, angry red too.

Even though I would have ignored this flavor in the past, when I saw Flamin’ Hot Dill Pickle Lay’s, I had to give them a try. 

They weren’t gross like I expected.  The sourness and the dill helped offset the intense Flamin’ Hot flavor (like nothing else in nature!), and I ended up thinking these would be good pickles to crush up on a burger or in a sandwich — maybe something that already had real pickles on it.  They would be great with some kind of cool, creamy dip, too.

And while we’re still on the condiment-flavored chips, Trader Joe’s offered these Patio chips over the summer of 2021 (and possibly still, although I haven’t looked for them since). 

The bag contained a blend of multiple chip flavors: sea salt and vinegar, delicious dill, homestyle ketchup (for all the people who make their own ketchup in a world where Heinz is easily available, cheap, and superior), and smokin’ sweet BBQ.  I appreciated this ambitious experiment, but I don’t think any of the Trader Joe’s flavors stood out on their own, and crunching on multiple flavors in the same mouthful didn’t work as well as I would have guessed.  If these have since been discontinued, I wouldn’t even be surprised.

As long as we’re talking about pickled things, the Kettle brand makes really tasty pepperoncini-flavored chips, which would be awesome crushed up on an Italian hoagie, a gyro, or a Greek salad, or anywhere else you might enjoy those pale green, mildly spicy pickled peppers.

Keep in mind these are also thicker, crunchier chips.  I don’t buy the Kettle brand very much because they only come in large bags, but I’m glad I took a chance with this particular flavor.  They really did taste like pepperoncini peppers!

So let’s switch gears now and talk about some more spicy chip flavors, after that flawless segue.  Lay’s briefly offered an Adobadas flavor in 2022, featuring chile peppers, tomato, and lime.

They were okay.  I only bought one small bag one time, and that was fine with me.

On my 2022 sojourn to the senses-shattering Buc-ee’s, a colossal convenience store that pretty much sums up the American experience and all of its excesses, I bought these “Hot” flavored chips:

And they delivered.  They were hot, but not overwhelmingly so.  Definitely not “Flamin’ Hot.”  I would have preferred some nuance, though.

These Southeastern Grocers Sweet Hot Barbecue chips came from Winn-Dixie, so you know they were cheap.  But were they good?

Actually, yeah.  I love the sweet, tangy smokiness of barbecue chips, and these packed more heat than most. I still prefer the New Orleans Blend, Southeastern Grocers’ Voodoo knockoff flavor, though.

Have you tried hot honey as a condiment?  Mike’s Hot Honey is the main brand, and it has a lot more heat than other companies’ versions.  It is awesome on pizza, just FYI.  And Utz makes a Mike’s Hot Honey potato chip flavor:

They are sweet and hot, so I guess I like my potato chips like I like my women.

Just in case anyone else cares about such things, Utz owns both Zapp’s and Dirty chips, in addition to its own brand.

Lay’s short-lived chile mango chips were also sweet and hot, but I didn’t care for the flavor combination as much:

This was a one-and-done flavor for me.  I love mangos like crazy.  I will eat mangos like they’re going out of style, and I’m a sucker for anything mango-flavored.  I was excited to find these and disappointed I didn’t love them, but you don’t have to take my word for it!

On a lucky trip to Walgreens (admittedly a while back), I found not one, but two new flavors of Lay’s: Hot Sauce (specifically Frank’s Red Hot, the perfect sauce for classic buffalo wings), and Kettle Cooked Beer Cheese.  I like Walgreens because they almost always get new chip flavors first, and unlike Publix, they sell them in small bags, which make me feel much less guilty about eating chips in the first place.  What do you get, six or seven chips in these wee bags?

I like Frank’s Red Hot sauce in the first place because it balances the cayenne pepper-based heat with the acidic tang of vinegar, and I love anything vinegary.  If you shy away from spicy food and order “mild” or plain wings, you probably won’t like these.  But if you do like typical hot sauce flavors, you will be in for a real treat with these chips, especially if you have some good blue cheese dip or dressing to go with them.

The Beer Cheese Lay’s were a lot more subtly flavored.  I’ve had real beer cheese before, and it is delicious.  A friend in Kentucky assures me it’s a big deal up there, whereas it is a little harder to find around Florida.  But these chips didn’t taste too strongly of anything.  I rarely regret trying new chip flavors, but I wouldn’t bother getting these again.  I haven’t seen them in a long time, so they may already be discontinued.

One more spicy flavor, and then we’re done, if you can believe it!  I’m guessing Game Day Chili Lay’s might have been timed to come out around the NFL playoffs and the Superb Owl.  I didn’t find them until early March (2021 or 2022?), and I was really surprised to find them at all.  These were yet another Walgreens find.  I love chili in all its forms, so I was excited to tear into this bag.

This flavor was also a little disappointing, especially given how much I love chili.  It wasn’t overly tomatoey, and I didn’t pick up on cheese at all.  It wasn’t very spicy either, and nothing about it tasted “meaty.”  I’ve already gone on at great length about how I love tomatoey flavors in my chips, but this one was a letdown.  At least I didn’t spring for a larger bag.

Well, that’s a pretty good rundown of the new potato chip flavors I’ve tried since 2021 — the good, the bad, and the weird.  If you have tried any of these, I want to hear about it.  Which ones have you enjoyed?  Were any disappointing or gross?  What are your favorite chip flavors and brands, especially if I haven’t covered them, and where can I get my hands on some?  I might not be an influencer, but if anyone wants to send me chips to review, I would probably graciously accept them!

So enjoy your Fourth of July, stay safe, have something delicious to eat (ideally accompanied by people you like spending time around), and remember to stay hydrated in this insane summer heat, especially if you’re munching and crunching on salty chips.

Eat My Conch

I haven’t checked out any new local food trucks in a while, but I passed the new Eat My Conch Brewery & Eatery trailer two weekends in a row at a Shell gas station at 7095 S. U.S. Hwy 17-92, in front of the Fern Park Lowe’s, and I finally had to stop there yesterday.

Devia and Nyesha, the mother-and-daughter team behind Eat My Conch (https://www.facebook.com/eatmyconch/) briefly had a restaurant in Longwood that one of my friends and food writer role models, Amy Drew Thompson of the Orlando Sentinel, reviewed in December 2022.  I always trust her judgment, so between her glowing review and the praise from a co-worker who went after I recommended it (despite never having visited myself), I was sad when the brick and mortar location closed before I had a chance to try it.  This truck was my chance, and it was totally worth the wait.

Eat My Conch serves Bahamian food, like from the Bahamas.  I am pleased to report (and even more pleased that I came up with this) that the delicious food is like a Bahamian rhapsody for your taste buds and your soul.  I ordered three dishes to take home to share with my wife, but they have a lot to choose from.
By the way, for anyone who might not know, conch is a kind of marine mollusk (a snail), so I appreciated the unintended pun of Eat My Conch setting up at the Shell station.

Without hesitation, I ordered conch fritters ($16).  You can’t go to a place with “Conch” in the name and not try the conch fritters, and they were so good.  These golden-brown spheres are kind of like hush puppies, but so much better.  If you know, you know.  (That’s what my students would say, anyway.)  They had perfect crispy outsides protecting, fluffy-soft interiors with bits of tender, chewy conch, and they were seasoned extremely well without being too spicy for my spice-averse wife to handle.  They went very well with the creamy, slightly tangy mayo-based dipping sauce.

My wife was also curious about Chicken N. D. Bag ($15), which sounds like a cartoon about a coward and a jerk, but instead it’s a hearty plate of perfectly fried chicken wings over really great fries, topped with thinly sliced onions.  The purpose of the onions is to steam over the in the paper bag, which added the slightest oniony essence to everything over my short drive home.  The fries had the lightest batter coating, which I always love, and despite not devouring them on site and even having them steam in the paper bag, they were still crispy and hot when we tore it open back at home.  The breading on the chicken wings stayed crispy too, which is always nice.

I’m assuming it was the Chicken N. D. Bag that came with this really good, creamy cole slaw with sweet, chewy, tangy Craisins, and not the conch fritters.  But I’m always happy to find mystery cole slaw!

The thing I was looking forward to trying the most ended up being both of our favorite: cool, refreshing conch salad ($16), with finely diced conch, tomato, onion, jalapeno pepper, mango, pineapple, and apple.  The fruit was a $3 upcharge, but I love sweet and fruity and spicy and savory flavors together, and I knew it would be well worth it.  I definitely got dehydrated yesterday, first after spending half my Saturday at work and not eating or drinking anything, and then waiting outside in the humidity while my order was being prepared from scratch.  As tasty as the fried items were, I enjoyed that cool conch salad the most.

I’ve never been to the Bahamas or anywhere in the Caribbean, but I have been assured the food at Eat My Conch is as authentic as it is tasty.  I can believe it.  Everything is made fresh to order, so don’t expect, dry, greasy conch fritters or wings that have been sitting around under heat lamps.  Since I wasn’t sure what the menu would include, I didn’t bother trying to call ahead, so I had to wait a while for my food.  But this isn’t a complaint, just a description!  It was totally worth the wait, but you may want to be wary if you’re in a hurry, especially if there is a line ahead of you.  That conch salad totally hit the spot, and everything else was really good too.  I hope you give them a try and enjoy your Bahamian rhapsody too, and I assure you it is real life, not just fantasy.

CLOSED: Outpost Kitchen, Bar, & Provisions

EDITOR’S NOTE: On November 9th, 2023, The Outpost Kitchen, Bar & Provisions suddenly closed, apparently evicted from its Maitland location after falling $64,000 behind in rent payments.  Staff were not given any prior notice.  See https://www.orlandosentinel.com/2023/11/10/outpost-kitchen-evicted-from-maitland-city-centre-records-show/.

***

After years of attempts, my wife (Doctor Professor Ma’am) and I finally had the most outstanding dinner last night at Outpost Kitchen, Bar, & Provisions (https://www.outpostkbp.com), a restaurant in suburban Maitland, nestled between Casselberry and Winter Park, surprisingly close to home.  It seemed like life kept conspiring to keep us from dining there, with all kinds of illnesses, injuries, and random emergencies forcing us to cancel previous reservations, but once we made it, it was totally worth the wait.

The décor is at once both rustic and hipster-modern, full of wooden tables and chairs (no booths), Edison-style hanging light bulbs, and even a retro refrigerator in the dining room, not far from the open kitchen.  There is also a large bar, an outdoor patio, and floor-to-ceiling glass windows surrounding the free-standing building that provide plenty of natural light and views of “scenic” Highway 17-92.

Shortly after being seated in that expansive, high-ceilinged, wide open dining room, we met the co-owner, Kevin Casey, who reached out to me on Facebook last year to invite us out to the Outpost.  Kevin was jovial and warm and welcoming, and I apologized for it taking us so long to get out there.  I can also say that the entire serving staff was top-notch.  We received some of the best service we’ve ever encountered at a restaurant in Orlando, not just from our own server, but from her compatriots, who all checked in on us periodically, hoping we were having the best experience.  (We were.)

I had not eaten all day, so my wife and I started our decadent dinner with handmade Outpost tots ($12), a wooden platter of eight golden-brown fried spheres, drizzled with Outpost sauce (not as sweet as a barbecue sauce, but thicker and not as hot as a hot sauce) and bourbon ranch.  Now, we all know tater tots, but these were nothing like standard tots or the beloved Beefy spuds at Orlando’s iconic Beefy King.  Each of these orbs, which were about the size of large golf balls, were more like potato pancakes, also known as latkes — crispy on the outside, but yielding and fluffy-soft and seasoned on the inside.

Kevin told us that these are complicated to make right, because the potatoes are all hand-shredded, and if the kitchen staff took too long, they would oxidize and ruin the batch, but they came up with a method to simplify the process.  Whatever they did, it worked, because these are some of the most perfect potato products we’ve ever partaken in.  If you ever go to the Outpost, don’t sleep on these not-so-tiny tots!

Something else cool about the Outpost is that they pay homage to Orlando’s culinary past.  So many people dismiss our touristy town as “chain restaurant hell,” even though I started this blog just about five years ago to combat that misconception and shine a well-deserved spotlight on some of our best local restaurants.  Kevin and Julie Casey are doing the same thing with their series of Memory Lane Menus, recreating classic dishes from beloved and much-missed eateries that closed years or even decades ago.  They first did that with Pebbles, a restaurant that I’ve heard about, but it closed before I moved here in 2004, and their current Memory Lane Menu is a tribute to the legendary Ronnie’s Restaurant.

Now I never made it to Ronnie’s either, but my wife has told me all about it, and it would probably have been my favorite restaurant in the city, had I ever eaten there.  I’ve seen the voluminous menu, and it looked very similar to another long-lost legend — Wolfie Cohen’s Rascal House, a Jewish delicatessen/diner on Collins Avenue in North Miami Beach.  Unlike Ronnie’s, I got to enjoy many meals at the Rascal House, first with my family as a kid and a teenager during weekends at the old-timey Art Deco motels right on the beach with names like the Dunes, the Driftwood, and the Desert Inn.  Years later, I would visit friends on trips home from Gainesville and catch up with them over late-night overstuffed sandwiches and metal dishes of free pickles and cole slaw.  I even got to take my wife to the Rascal House once, in 2007, when we were still newly dating, before the it closed its doors for good.  I will always treasure those memories and those meals, especially because the Rascal House was the first restaurant I recall my family traveling out of its way to, trekking from suburban Kendall to Sunny Isles Beach, decades before seeking out the best food anywhere I could find it would become one of my adulthood hobbies.

But back to Ronnie’s now: the Outpost’s Memory Lane Menu for Ronnie’s is available for ONE MORE WEEK, until Saturday, June 10th.  They are offering three classic Ronnie’s dishes: cabbage soup made with beef short ribs (which was sadly sold out when we went last night), a chocolate eclair made from an original Ronnie’s recipe, and a corned beef and pastrami platter, which we ordered to share as an appetizer.  I had heard stories and fables about Ronnie’s corned beef and pastrami, served with potato salad and sliced tomatoes, and I must be honest, that was what finally spurred us to make it to the Outpost.  I’m so glad it got us in the door, because it was amazing, and so was everything else.  

Here’s a close-up of the thick, hand-carved slices of mostly lean pastrami, crusted with a delicious, peppery, spicy “bark”: 

And as much as I love pastrami (which is a lot), I liked the Outpost’s version of Ronnie’s corned beef even better, because it was marbled with so much creamy, unctuous fat.  Even without rye bread and mustard, these deli delicacies were a huge hit.  We just nibbled on them at the restaurant, but I finished them in a sandwich earlier today (on a toasted sourdough roll since we didn’t have rye at home, but with good Carnegie Deli dusseldorf mustard). 

My wife always likes a good steak even more than I do (I’m more of a sandwich and burger guy), and one thing she always craves is a coffee-rubbed steak.  Very few restaurants in Orlando offer them, but the Outpost sure does: the Crusty New Yorker, a peppercorn and coffee-crusted New York strip steak, covered with garlic caper cream sauce and served on a bed of creamy cauliflower rice.  She asked for the steak rare, and it was cooked perfectly, beautifully rare, pre-sliced and rich purple-red inside.  She also loves capers and cream sauces, so she was in heaven with this dish.  She was admittedly skeptical about the cauliflower rice, but we both really liked it.  It had a slight crunch that regular rice doesn’t have, but the creaminess and seasoning reminded me a bit of risotto.With the bounty of everything we ordered, she would end up getting three full meals out of this generous portion.

And even though I was tempted by many dishes on the menu, one of the Outpost’s burgers really sang out to me: the Black Cherry Burger, cooked to an ideal medium rare and topped with house-smoked brisket, yellow cheddar cheese, caramelized onions, and sliced hot cherry peppers on a brioche bun.  I wish it had been a little bigger (only because I wish all burgers were bigger, from White Castle on up), but it was delicious.  I would rank it among the finest burgers in the city, without a doubt.  It came with really solid fries, which I dipped in a little metal ramekin of house-made barbecue sauce.  Good fries, but after those tantalizing, tremendous tots, they were almost anticlimactic.

My wife is a bigger dessert person than I am, whereas I can often take or leave something sweet after a big meal.  Still, we were both equally tempted by two different desserts on the Outpost’s masterful menu, and we splurged and ordered both.  This was the drunken blueberry bread pudding, served in a small, sizzling-hot skillet.  It was made with brioche and sweet Hawaiian bread, bourbon custard, fresh blueberries, tangy orange icing, and blueberry compote.  It was really decadent, but not nearly as sweet as you might be thinking.  It was spectacular, and a perfect way to end a summer meal.  This was my wife’s favorite of the two desserts.

They also offered a pineapple upside down cake special, and even though I bake a mean pineapple upside down cake myself, we were both intrigued by it too.  Unlike mine, which is a light, moist pineapple-flavored cake, this one was a denser spice cake, almost like a richer, sweeter gingerbread.  It was topped with a roasted pineapple ring and some sweet, sticky caramel glaze, and that is a dehydrated pineapple ring on the side, thin and chewy and sweet and sticky like fruit leather.  (Kinky!)  The dark pools are a cherry glaze, although i thought they might be balsamic reduction at first.  Cherry definitely fit better with pineapple upside-down cake.  Our dutiful server told us that this was such a big hit, it would probably become a regular menu item moving forward.  You heard it here first, folks!

Now you stalwart Saboscrivnerinos (my baker’s dozens of regular readers) know that The Saboscrivner takes pride in his journalistic integrity.  I am proudly not an influencer (in fact, I still take perverse pride in some rando Redditor referring to me as an “anti-influencer”), and I never go into these restaurants asking for freebies in exchange for a good review.  I wouldn’t dare, and I think that is rude and gauche and presumptuous and any number of unprintable terms.  That said, since Kevin invited us in so long ago, I let him know we were coming since I wanted to meet him and thank him for reaching out… and he ended up hooking us up, out of the goodness of his heart.  I was shocked, and I insisting on paying as much of the bill as they would let me, in addition to leaving a generous tip for our server based on what this large, luxurious meal would have originally cost.  It was all so great, I would have written this identical review anyway, minus this paragraph.  We loved everything, and we look forward to returning and becoming regulars.  But that’s how nice the owner is, even during a time when local restaurants are struggling.

That’s why I am doubling down with my recommendation here.  Visit the Outpost!  They serve brunch on Saturdays and Sundays, and apparently Saturdays are a lot more chill compared to the busier Sundays.  They are even planning to institute a weekday brunch menu, so be on the lookout for that.  If you loved Ronnie’s back in the day (or you just love Jewish delis, like I do with all my heart), definitely stop by in the next week for a taste of Ronnie’s classic menu.  I will definitely swing back by, hoping for that beef short rib cabbage soup to go!  Also, stay tuned for the Outpost’s next Memory Lane Menu, paying homage to Gary’s Duck Inn, apparently the inspiration for the original Red Lobster.  I never made it there either, but some locals probably have, and it sounds like something that should not be missed.  The Outpost should not be missed, either.

Chain Reactions: Culver’s

Culver’s (https://www.culvers.com/) is a fast food chain that was founded in in Sauk City, Wisconsin, in 1984.  I tried it on a short trip to Wisconsin over 20 years ago, to visit the weird, wonderful, and uniquely American roadside attraction The House on the Rock in Spring Green, Wisconsin.  Now we have multiple Culver’s locations across Central Florida, and since I am obsessed with regional restaurants and food trends, I appreciate having more options to choose from, chains or not.

Culver’s is famous for its frozen custard, “ButterBurgers,” and breaded, fried cheese curds.  But even though the ButterBurgers are above average fast food burgers, my wife and I usually return when we’re in the mood for delicious fish, hand-battered and deep-fried.  Culver’s has the best fried fish of any fast food restaurants, and better than a surprising amount of seafood restaurants and Irish and British pubs we’ve been to.

Specifically, they serve North Atlantic cod, which you can get as a sandwich or as a dinner with two or three pieces of fish.  Sometimes my wife and I will split a three-piece North Atlantic cod dinner, which comes with fries, cole slaw, and a roll, but you can select two sides of your choice if you don’t want fries (standard crinkle-cut fries) or cole slaw.  Ring the Alarm!  Culver’s has excellent onion rings, with beer batter coating similar to the battered cod filets.  They are my favorite fast food onion rings.  They are considered a Premium side, so you have to pay a small upcharge for them.  DO IT!

Here’s a close-up of the battered fish from a different visit.  It will make you say “Oh my cod!”

As great as the Atlantic cod is (and it is), Culver’s brings out a different battered, fried fish once a year for a limited time: Canadian Northwoods walleye, which is a very light, buttery fish.  Even though this sandwich is $7.99, which seems expensive for fast food, it is worth every penny.  I added the creamy, crunchy cole slaw on top of the sandwich, too:By the way, the Culver’s website says the tartar sauce includes olives, capers and sweet relish!  I would not have guessed olives or capers, but they list the ingredients right on the peel-off lid of the little dipping cup.

That walleye doesn’t look that different from the cod, but trust me, you could tell the difference in a taste test.  The sandwich comes with a bit of lettuce and tartar sauce underneath the fish, and the bun is buttered and lightly grilled like all Culver’s sandwich buns.  That’s always a nice touch.   

I already said that I think the ButterBurgers are just okay, but Culver’s amazed and astonished when they came out with this limited-time special: the “Curderburger.”  It is exactly what you think — a burger served on the typical bun (buttered and lightly grilled, thank you very much), topped with a “cheese crown.”  Yes, that is a giant breaded and fried cheese curd patty, and it’s the stuff that dreams are made of.  (Because “SWEET DREAMS ARE MADE OF CHEESE!”)

Here’s a cross-section, with melty, molten cheddar cheese curd leaking out of the fried patty on top of the burger.  You probably shouldn’t eat more than one of these a year, or the Curderburger could become a Murderburger.  Luckily, it is a limited-time menu item. 
I should note that back in the ’90s, my brother and I were enamored with a similar decadent burger from the late, lamented chain restaurant Bennigan’s, the “Wheelhouse burger,” topped with what was essentially a mozzarella cheese stick in patty form instead of stick form.  And I have to give a shout-out to Orlando’s beloved Se7enbites, the Southern restaurant and bakery where Chef Trina Gregory-Propst created the Italian Stallion burger, topped with tomato jam, pesto aioli, and a mozzarella cheese plank.  But I digress!

This is my wife’s favorite Signature side, the pretzel bites, which you have to pay a $1.50 upcharge for if you get them in a combo with a sandwich or a dinner.  But again, like so many things at Culver’s, they are totally worth it.  The outside crust is lightly crackly and crispy and buttery and salty, and the inside is pillowy soft.  They come with a little dipping cup of Wisconsin cheddar cheese sauce for dipping, but they don’t need anything — and I say that as someone who always likes dipping things in other things. 

In fact, I tried a few of the different dipping sauces with onion rings, as you can see.  That’s the Wisconsin cheddar cheese sauce on the left in the unlabeled cup.  The Boom Boom sauce is a little spicy and surprisingly thick and heavy, but the creamy, tangy Culver’s Signature sauce SLAPS.  Those are both recent discoveries from my last trip, and I would definitely get that Signature sauce again.

George’s chili is considered a Signature side too, so you have to pay a $1.50 upcharge for it as well.  I always love chili, and if it’s offered on a menu, I will always try it.  The website boasts that this is “medium-spicy” chili con carne, but keep in mind this is a chain restaurant from Wisconsin, and I found it very mild.  It is made by simmering ground beef (the same stuff the burgers are made of, naturally), diced tomatoes, dark red kidney beans, peppers, onion and celery, and a “secret blend of peppery spices.”  With Culver’s always making a big deal about its Wisconsin roots and all its great cheese, I thought the chili could really use some shredded cheese or the cheddar cheese sauce on top to melt into it. 

I appreciate fast food restaurants that don’t just offer burgers and chicken, but have all kinds of odd, offbeat options.  You may have already noticed Culver’s is cool like that, but they even have a pot roast sandwich made with hand-shredded braised chuck roast.  I have a deep, abiding love of slow-braised and stewed meats, cooked until they are moist and tender and falling apart.  Too many people under-season their pot roast and dry it out, to the point that you can chew it forever and nothing happens, but not so with this sandwich.  It was a tasty, savory alternative to the standard burgers and fried fish, and I would definitely get it again some time.

In addition to the ButterBurgers, the frozen custard is a big draw at Culver’s and a major part of its brand.  It is my wife’s favorite part — even more than the fish.  She usually opts for the chocolate custard with chunks of Butterfinger candy swirled in, but this time she got it with some chocolate syrup, pecans, and a cherry on top. 

I’ve been sitting on this review for the better part of a year, waiting for the triumphant return of Culver’s lemon ice, a summer treat that sadly disappears for the rest of the year.  Summer is my least-favorite season here in hot, humid, sticky, sweltering Florida, but I do love all the sweet, cold, refreshing drinks and treats that come out in the summer.  My favorite is Culver’s lemon ice — in this case, a strawberry-mango lemon ice cooler, which is real slow-frozen lemonade swirled with real fruit.  It is definitely a dessert, not as wholesome and nutritious as a smoothie (although smoothies are also high in calories and carbs), but I love ’em.  Culver’s actually has lemon ice smoothies as well, where they mix the lemon ice and fruit with their vanilla custard, but I like them more tangy and acidic and less creamy.  I drank a fair bit on the drive home before I could take this photo, but they really do fill the cup all the way up.  I’m trying to avoid sweets and desserts and sugary sodas, but I can see enjoying a few more lemon ice coolers before the summer of 2023 ends.

The thing on the right is a chocolate custard with M&Ms mixed in — my wife’s choice, of course.

So that’s Culver’s.  They take longer to prepare your meal than most other fast food establishments, and cost considerably more, but you pay for quality, including fresh food cooked to order every time.  I must admit I always look askance at the receipt on every trip to Culver’s and think “REALLY?”  But the two kinds of fish (the cod and limited-time walleye), the onion rings, the pretzel bites, and the lemon ices never disappoint, and my wife loves that chocolate custard too.  Anyone who has ever read my food blog knows that I don’t consider myself too cool or too sophisticated to enjoy fast food.  I am neither an elitist nor a health nut.  Culver’s is definitely well above average for fast food, so give it a try if you haven’t already.  And if you have, what are YOUR Culver’s favorites?